I do not know how to be, she knelt down and began to ask the Mother of God to add her mind.

In relationships, people sooner or later show all the features of their character. Both good and bad. Because it's too hard to hide your nature. Closed-in recluses can be real extroverts. And ready to come to the aid of all companions in fact will begin to reproach their soulmate for unnecessary spending, and doing it almost every day. Human poverty It manifests itself in very different ways.



Therefore, many experienced people advise young couples to look at each other longer before running to the registry office. Get to know each other. It is very important to understand what your future partner will be in a critical situation. Because, as they say, “in sorrow and in joy.” But, unfortunately, feelings do not always give us the opportunity to soberly assess the situation. This is probably why many divorces happen. But you can't tell your heart.

I don’t want to tell you a long story about my life, especially since there is no plot in it. Yeah, that's how simple it is. But in less than fifteen years together with my husband, some emotions have accumulated. And they're not really nice. Perhaps speaking out is not a bad idea. There's nobody. My friends will not understand me, and I cannot complain to my husband about our lives. Because I know I'm going to be wrong.



Peels I know it may feel weird, but at 43 I'm just bored living. It would seem that I am mad with fat: I have a successful spouse, children. I’m still pretty myself, live and rejoice, but it doesn’t work. Kostya still loves me. Maybe even more than I loved when I was young. Kids are smart, they go to school. I play the role of a loving wife and a happy mother, but you would know how hard it is for me to be alone and think about the future. It is so gray and monotonous that you want to howl a wolf.

I began to live independently early and at the age of 20 I was already living in the city, having moved from my native village. There was a lot of energy, hopes and plans. But the reality only mocked me: a hopeless job, a tiny payment, the lack of the right acquaintances, even my apartment was somehow problematic, with constantly changing loud neighbors. For a while, I lived the dream that everything was about to change for the better. But then she accepted reality. I looked around and noticed Kostya.



Peels He was, to put it bluntly, never "my type." Short, thin, balding, even though he was only 25 years old at the time. Anyway, he's a beau. But he loved me with all his heart and had good prospects for life. So I just decided to go with the flow. We got married, then the first child was born, and after him... Kostya has always protected me as his personal princess. He treated his daughters with less affection than he did me. Double feelings. But it was nice to feel special.



Are there gentlemen these days? Of course there is. My husband constantly pleased my ego with various gifts, goodies. Giving flowers. If I felt bad, even for nothing, he could just take the day off and spend the day with me. The good of places for leisure in our city has always been in sufficient quantity. It's a shame I'd rather spend that time myself than with Bones. You know when a person is annoyed just by their presence? That's the option.

We even had a period when he took me to his office. Just to make me have more fun. I didn’t actually have any work. But I was able to interact with other people, study local relationships, in short, avoid routine as much as I could. Six months later, I decided to leave. The thing is that my Kostya seemed to me against the background of other men even more unlovable. He was in charge of them all, and it was kind of funny. But not so much that I looked at my husband without looking away when some twenty-five-year-old high-ranking accountant passed by.



I once caught myself thinking that I needed a banal affair. I even thought about it for a while. But then I looked around and realized that even my husband was not worthy of this attitude. He is a good man and has helped me a lot. It's not his problem that I never got to love him. Even in spite of our children... So this option doesn't suit me either. Besides, the risk is too great. I'm sure things won't go according to plan, and everyone will find out. What do we do?

Divorce? Maybe. How to formulate a claim? “Constantin, I’m leaving the family, I’m taking the kids because all these years you’ve been a stranger to me. Yeah, and when we went on vacation together. All those times. And when you hired me just for my whims. And when ...” I know I sound like a broken record. I can’t even imagine why I’m unhappy. This is not clear even from my own words.



Peels And yet it is. I don't know what to do. I just live, if I may say so. Some women will probably understand me. Some people don't. This is understandable, just do not need too strong emotions. I probably still have time to get to know myself better. Maybe one morning I’ll wake up and find out what I’m missing. But for now, my life is viscous, tasteless jelly. And it stretches and stretches without end. Unfortunately, I can’t get out of this mix yet. I'm trying really hard.