Does a mother have a conscience that she does not want to sit with her daughter’s children?

For probably any grandmother. grandchildren Something from the category of sacred, the most important work of life. Nanny them, cook them, read fairy tales... If possible, of course.



But there are some grandparents who don’t need it. Who in their years believe that life is just beginning and you can do a lot more useful things. If not for others, then for yourself. Or they just want to rest. To blame them for this or to support them is a completely different matter, but relatives will always have their own opinion on this matter.

Helping grandchildren My mother is selfish. Yes, I declare this with full responsibility. Now I am 36 years old, and I can’t remember anything truly bright from my childhood or youth. I studied on my own or at school. For the most part, the father was responsible for the upbringing. Mom lived her life.



She is relatively young, not even sixty. And I'm not asking her for money, no. The problem is that she refuses to sit with her grandchildren. Small children are troubles, but as I know, grandmothers love to sit with their grandchildren. But my mother refuses. They say it’s a big responsibility and I have to educate them.

In general, I agree with her. But my request came for a reason. The fact is that now I have not the best financial situation, and hiring a nanny in our time is quite expensive. I don’t have time to sit with my child because I work for myself. Grandma’s help is the perfect option. But it wasn't.



Five years ago, my husband and I took out loans to start a small business: a bakery. There was a lot of work and few orders. But it is normal to start a business, it takes a lot of effort, and we were ready for it. As children, we spent all our time and effort on our business. And after a while, gradually began to come out in the plus.

A little later things got better, and we even bought a car, made repairs. There was a little time for myself, and it was decided to go on vacation for a week. The employees were doing well and we were completely confident in them. Upon arrival, we were faced with some problems, which, nevertheless, could be solved in minimal time, if we worked hard together.

But just at that moment, my mother got sick. I just had to sit with her and literally spoon-feed her. The situation began to deteriorate, and on all fronts: my mother got worse, several orders for work were broken due to problems with technology, and my husband was very offended by me.



© Freepik But nothing to do with myself I could not and remained to care for a sick mother. We continued to suffer losses, and my husband closed himself and stopped talking to me. No, there were fights and scandals, because he saw all our progress at work go to waste.

After a while, my mom felt better and I was able to get back to work. Being with an angry man is impossible. It went on for another month, and in the end we decided to live separately. But it all ended well and thanks to the concessions we both agreed to make, my husband came home and I got pregnant. It's been another year and a half and... A pandemic has begun.



© Freepik Our business has not brought such profits. In fact, a little more, and we would only sink to self-sufficiency. It’s a good thing we’ve anticipated something like this before and put it a little bit off for the future. Otherwise, I just don’t know how we would have survived the birth of a child.

Little by little, some customers came back and we found other suppliers. Things were slowly starting to bounce back and I was full of energy and ideas to get to work. But there's no one to leave the kids with. There is no extra money for someone else. And imagine what kind of person you need to be so that your own grandson does not understand. Especially when it comes to helping your daughter.

I don't know what to do, dear ones. That's my situation. I don't know what to do. We are talking to old friends with whom we have long lost contact. Shame, but what can we do? That's what we're doing.



Sad, especially considering that you, dear reader, used to help your mother and even suffered from it. But people are all different. For some, the institution of the family is in the first place, and for others it is only a burden. Your idea with friends we believe is true, but you can also check the accounting and take a small loan in order to hire a nanny. Money you and your husband will still earn, but normal child care should be now. At least we think so. There may be someone smarter in the comments. Good luck!