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The wisdom of forgiveness: 7 ways to survive the insult
Each of us, regardless of age and life experience, faced with such situations where similar or not much people did that after that it became very painful. Someone with such situations in life were more, some less, and each has its own story on this. As a result, we typically experience a very unpleasant feeling, which is called the offense and very often it's many years living inside of us, poisoning the very life. This powerful and destructive emotion with long-term effects on the body can cause significant harm, up to malignant tumors. From the point of view of energy interactions hurt on a subconscious level is a hidden wish of death to the offender, that certainly returns and eventually transformirovalsya to problems in various spheres of life.
That is why it is very important to learn to forgive, to let go of the negative that happened in their lives and thereby clear space for positive emotions and sensations, and joyful events in life.
On the importance of forgiveness say, and representatives of different religions, and many psychologists and teachers. They all agree on one thing – if he appeared in human life, it doesn't just happen, unfairly. This means that we for some reason need to go through this difficult and painful lesson, to learn to love regardless of the circumstances, learn to forgive and to change something in yourself. For example, often when women cause resentment by their family men, is a sign that a woman loves herself enough, or is so immersed in caring for others that completely loses your true self, or subconscious experiences, that is, an implicit aggression to the man. Below I offer you to get acquainted with various techniques in order so you can pick the one that suits you. It is worth to mention that forgiveness is not an easy job, almost always have to relive the pain that has been tested once, time to let go and forgive, but the result you will achieve, svobodas this weight is worth it. You will feel freer and easier, and life will sparkle with new colors. If within us there is no resentment, the heart frees the creative energy of love, as if a person shines from the inside, and it becomes noticeable to the naked eye. If we are able to accept and forgive, and people and ourselves with him becomes much more comfortable and happier.
Before you start using any of the methods that I recommend to do the following steps. First, we should try to understand that no matter how painful and hard we may be, in the current situation has a lot to learn, and although we can not understand because of the strong emotions and the feeling that we did not fair, that's happened to us has deep meaning and opportunity by overcoming the trials become better and qualitatively change something in your life. Second – try to remember all those whom you have offended and offended still, make yourself a list and then select among them those with whom are associated most powerful emotions. Thus you will have two groups of people, well, who to forgive first choose for yourself: it is easy to get rid of the minor grievances and then move on to strong and painful, someone on the contrary.
Method the first. Prayer.This tool is particularly suitable for those who are close to any religion. In each of them there are prayers that can help to cope with the offense, there are many saints to whom you can turn for help.
Regardless of whether you belong to any religious denomination, in Church or at home, you can just imagine the offender and repeatedly pronounce the following words:
With gratitude, love, and God's help, I forgive you (name) and accept you entirely. I apologize to you for hurting you their thoughts or actions and ask (Name) to forgive me for the negative emotions, thoughts and actions against you.The second way. Meditation of Forgiveness offered by the famous writer Louise hay.Find a comfortable place where you won't be disturbed. Close your eyes if you want, you can turn on soft music, light scented candles. Relax completely, from the top of the head to the toes, try not to be distracted by extraneous thoughts and fully immersed in yourself and your feelings. Once you are fully relaxed, imagine that you are in a darkened room of the theater. Here is a small scene. You see on the stage the person who hurt you. This person can be alive or dead, and your hatred might be, as in the past and in the present.
When you will clearly see this person, imagine what happens to him something good, that this person is of great importance. Imagine him smiling and happy. Hold this image in your presentation for a few minutes and then let it fade away. Then, when the person you want to forgive, leave the stage, put there yourself. Imagine that happens to you only good. Picture yourself happy and smiling. And know that in the Universe good enough for all of us.
This exercise dissolves the dark clouds of accumulated resentment. To some this exercise may seem very difficult. Each time you do it, you can draw in the imagination of different people. Do this exercise once a day for a month and see how much you will be easier to live.
The third way. The method of "forgiveness Meditation" A. Sviyash.
Select the person to whom you will be working with the thought form of your negative experiences. For example, let it be your father.
Start mentally many times in a row to repeat the phrase:
With love and gratitude I forgive my father and accept him as God made him (or: and accept it for what it is). I apologize to my father for my negative thoughts, emotions and actions towards him. My father forgives me for my thoughts, emotions and actions towards him.This formula works best for erasing negative emotions in relation to people with whom you meet regularly and experiencing the discomfort, but can be used for dead people. This is the same form used for events, any phenomena, and even Life.
With love and gratitude, I forgive Life and accept it in all its forms to be what she was created by God (or: take it for what it is). I apologize to my Life for my negative thoughts, emotions and actions towards her. My Life forgives me for my thoughts, emotions and actions towards her.The methodology for this is to perform to each person to whom you feel negative emotions of not less than 3 –4 hours in total. And to those who barely remember, I can do 20-40 minutes. When you feel heat in the center of the chest, in most cases, this will mean that in relation to this person you have in the body emotions of negativity left. And try to remember all of the people with whom you could be associated with any negative experiences.
The way the fourth. Technique Of Forgiveness Margarita Murakhovski.Imagine you are on a country road. Around flower meadow. The road divides the large field, covered with beautiful wild flowers. You hear the buzzing of insects, the singing of a lark in the high sky. You can breathe easily and quietly. You slowly move on the road. To meet you is a man. And the closer he is approaching you, the more you begin to understand that this is your father. This is your father, only in his youth. You approach him, take his hands and say, "Hello, daddy. Please forgive me, for what I wasn't(a) like you wanted. Thank you for everything, for what was and what was not. Daddy, I love you so much. I forgive you for everything. I forgive you because you weren't there for me when I missed you so much. I forgive you. You don't owe me anything. You are free". You begin to notice how your father turns into a small child. He is about 3 years. You look at this kid, and you want to take it on handles, pressed gently to yourself and say "I love you. I love you so much". A small child becomes tiny, it fits in your palm. You with tenderness and love put it in your heart, in your soul. Where he will be comfortable and relaxed. You take a deep breath and go on. To meet you is a man. And the closer he is approaching you, the more you begin to understand that this is your mother, only younger. It is now many years when she gave birth to you. You walk up to her and taking her hands in his, saying, Hello, mummy. Please forgive me, for everything, for what you did you hurt sometimes. I'm sorry that we fell short of your expectations. And I forgive you for everything. For what was and what was not. Forgive because when I needed you, you weren't there. "I forgive you with love. You're free now. Thank you for everything, because thanks to you, I was born. Thank you for your tenderness and care," You begin to notice how your mom turns into a little girl of 3 years. She stands before you. You take it on handles, pressed gently to yourself and say, "I love you. You are the most near and dear." She gets so tiny that you fit on the palm. You put it in your heart, in your soul. Where it will be warm and comfortable.
You take a deep breath and move on. In the distance you see a figure of a man. And the closer you get, the more you begin to understand what it is you are. You look at yourself and say, "Well, Hello. Please forgive me, for everything. Because you always appreciate. I really really love you. You are the most close and native person for me". You begin to notice how the person standing before you becomes three-year-old. You take it to handle, cuddle, saying, "you know I love you, I love you." This wonderful child becomes very small, it fits in your palm. You put it in your heart, in your soul, in your inner world.
Now your inner child, inner parent, inner adult with you. These parts help you to live and function effectively. Again you are on a country road. You breathe easy and freely. You have a peace in my heart. And now in your life everything will be different because you are different. You are filled with love for yourself and your parts are harmonious. Take a deep breath and exhale and open your eyes. Once you have established contact with itself, for this scheme, you can engage in forgiveness of others.
The method of the fifth. The technique of forgiveness, S. Gawan.Step 1. Forgiveness and release others.
Write on a sheet of paper the names of all those people who you feel have ever hurt you, treated you wrong and unfair. Or (and) those toward whom you still feel (or felt before) resentment, anger and other negative feelings. Next to each person write what he did to you. And, for what you offended. Then close your eyes, relax and visualize or imagine each person. Spend with each of them a little chat and explain to him or her that in the past you are at it (her) felt anger or resentment, but now intend to do everything for you to forgive them for everything. Give them your blessing and say, "I forgive you and release you. Go your own way and be happy."
When you're finished with this process, write on your sheet of paper: "I Now forgive and release you all" and throw it or burn it as a symbol of the fact that you are freed from these experiences of the past.
A huge advantage of the proposed sh Gawain technique is that you forgive not only others, but yourself. That is get not from just anger and resentment, but also from the guilt and associated shame.
Step 2. Forgiveness and freeing yourself.
Now write the names of all those who you think you've ever hurt or who was unfair. Write what you have done with each of them. And then again close your eyes, relax and imagine each of these people in turn. Tell him or her what you did and ask them to forgive you for it and give you my blessing. Then imagine them doing that — i.e. forgiving you.
When you quit, write down or across your sheet of paper: "I forgive myself and take all the blame here, now and forever!" Then rip the paper and throw it away (or again burn).
Sixth method. "Three-step exercise on writing the healing letters" by E. bass and L. Davis.
This technique gives people the opportunity to experience the support and approval regardless of the response insulted him (her) subject.
The first letter.
The work begins with the fact that you write the first letter to the offender, which describe in some detail the details of the abuse, your feelings about the abuse (also very detailed), how it has affected your life. This letter may contain requirements of certain forms of punishment and/or apology that you deem appropriate for your abuser.
The second letter.
Then you write a second letter, which, in your opinion, the offender could write or had written for You, if peg had the opportunity. It can be stated that the offender was talking to you during the same situation memorable insults. That is, it should contain the answer you in General fear.
The third and most important letter.
Now you need to write a letter in which you state the answer you need. This, of course, an imaginary response from the person you insulted. The answer that he could write if he wanted to take responsibility for the insult and Express his regret and remorse about the offense. In other words, the third letter is the one that more all you need: a letter, which, alas, is not received and is unlikely to ever get. Therefore, writing a third letter can be an important stage of your liberation, because in it you can Express (and receive) so missing you apologies, feelings of support and remorse.
More healing letters effective in all cases when the person who inflicted the insult is beyond physical reach — for any reason (for example, due to his death). In this case, the letters seem to complete the external and internal conflict with those who refused or did not have time to take responsibility for the insult.
Method seventh. Emotionally corrective experience (the author of John. Rainwater).
Write down or insult you disturbing episode in the form of a short story written in the present tense and first person. As accurately as possible, restore all events (unless, of course, they do not become for you a serious psychological trauma). Restore all dialogs and describe their feelings.
Now rewrite the story as you wish it happened. Give a slap in the face to the offender, go towards the Stalker and defeat him. Somehow, but take revenge on the tormentor. Or like the person you hate.
Do whatever you want. Create new dialogs. Describe your other senses. And make up your own ending and the ending.published
Author: Marina Kabirov
Source: vseedino.ru/mudrost-proshheniya-sem-prostykh-sposobov-perezhit-obidu