Freedom vs. Relationships

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... AS THEY SAY:
"it is easy to be a monk in the Himalayan wilderness."

Easy to fast, when there is no temptation, it is easy to remain conscious when there is nothing to distract your mind, it is easy to be kind when there's totally no reason for fear. Let "easy" isn't the right word. But all these deliberate changes much easier feasible in privacy without people, than other things being equal, in close city with coming from everywhere worldly things, besides, if this fuss — care for your own family.A similar effect is observed from you: to stay healthy, seeing and receiving the world, immersed in interesting activities, while maintaining contact with your inner center — the easier one, when all the time, resources and energy provided only for you. It creates a vacuum where you can clearly define your own rules and follow them, changing the patterns and forms of their existence in the right direction.

But other people, even the most desirable — loved companion, children, invariably encroach on that world. Moreover, they change its settings. Reality, individual vacuum, is no more. Where is the guarantee that enough internal forces to balance when so close looked into the eyes of his own weakness?

And here you are confronted with one fundamental question: are you ready for a life container I own, which, no doubt, easier to keep balance or will further uncovered through the thickness of inner fears?

I can't speak for everyone, but for very many people, loneliness is a necessary stage for the first internal step to his conscious, without dependencies, to his understanding of himself. It gives you the opportunity to find the threads of connection with the world, to unravel the roots of their chronic wheelspin and most importantly – stop being afraid of that inner hole, which, through blindness, we are trying to silence another person. But that path ends.

Single race under the banner of "create yourself anew", as a way to reset it and start from the base – an important and necessary step, but the finishing ribbon on this piece is not.

I already wrote about the art of keeping balance in life. To the question "is it possible to simultaneously develop all spheres of life from scratch?", is such an illustration:

Take 4 apples. Medium size, easy to hold in hands.

Keep? Great.

Now juggle them to none of them fell on the floor. Moreover, juggle beautifully, highly skillfully. Putting his heart and soul into this process. We're here for maximum implementation, right?

It is difficult to deny the fact that there are people who easily and skillfully juggling four apples, so that there – they ten able. So this is possible. But if possible and you can. Or?

Juggle. Right now. None dropping.

To watch as someone who deftly handles all the aspects of your life and try to repeat your experience with utopia, especially if your life need a complete overhaul, down to the pouring of a new Foundation. Learn how to consciously develop one sector – be it business, body or relationships, and then, a little firmly established in the process of conscious life creation, add "apples".

To learn how to juggle four apples, you first need to learn how avicode, then add to it the second, and so on, and after mastering the basics – each subsequent Apple to add easier and easier.

Go to Association on and you will see the answer to your question. What happens to those who have already learned well to juggle two apples, if you want to add a third Apple?

Imagine.

You juggling two apples. Doing it right now. Doing fine. Apples do not fall. Practically the master of this stage. But logically want to develop further, what kind durablity juggler, honestly? Take the third Apple. Begin to turn. And?

If you know how to juggle two apples, learning to maintain balance, when you add a new Apple – your design will STILL fail. The apples fall to the floor. Fall not once, not twice. It is the law of reaching a new level. Your rhythm will stray. But if you are scared, and just lift and you try on something at some point adapt, the more skill is already developed, and tone will be restored: you will be masterly to turn now three apples. Nothing dropping. It's a matter of time and skill.

In other words, you horror, as scary and, in principle, these fears are unfounded. You are just afraid of again dissolving their interests and dependence on another person, you subconsciously realize that virtually guaranteed you will get into it, the rhythm will go astray. But this time you have in your Arsenal the tools to regenerate and samosoznania that you purchase right now. With them you'll be back in good shape. If you have such intention, of course.

Independently, we can work to any sphere of life except relationships. This area, where another man with his opinion, habits and fears. How can anything create itself, and to progress in matters of the body or business, but the relationship in a vacuum is not resolved. Here we have only to go into the open field and pull out the baobabs in the process of these relations. This is the only area that is not worked out in person. Only through a process of co-existence.

Relationships, especially deep, trusting relationship based on love is always a connection with another person. The only question of awareness. Blindly she turns into destructive uncontrollable addiction, and in a clear mind takes the form of spiritual and physical connection that different people felt in varying degrees of intensity, depending on the sensitivity to the manifestations of this world. But anyway, the relationship is always a risk without insurance, and guarantees. When you love and open, are you connected with another person and are unable unilaterally to control it. And your balance, and, may be, because someone from the outside. You can get hurt. And have done in the past. You're vulnerable. And, most dramatic, you know that.

Output here two: navigables in the past, simply shut down from love (wanting to be loved more than you give priority to "comfortable" relationship without any feelings or to opt out of these "snot"), or take the risk to love at full capacity, without looking at the fears and past experiences. To trust a partner. Completely. Allow yourself to be vulnerable, thus abandoning fears.

But to keep your inner balance is to spin the apples of their studies (even if at first they fell), allowing his companion to do the same – have their own interests. To feel your center, but only with the manifested relationship with a loved one.

Julia, perhaps you'd like me to speculate about the meat or half-naked charge. Would be more specific. But then I have nothing much to say. The roots of your doubt is quite different –the story of twig, as a way to work with your fears will help you a lot more than the reasoning about whether a vegetarian and avegetarian to live together. Besides, for the record, men are vegetarians there are to do together exercises in the morning is a pleasure, and when children will dress up and let it be the biggest compromise in your life. Question on your internal readiness. Just take a step further, to start with in your mind, allow yourself to learn what real trust and intimacy and complete acceptance of another person, but you have to go through their deepest fears, possibly repeatedly burning.

Well, in the end, to do with fears?1) allow them to be

Instead of looking for a way to get rid of their troubles, or to listen to their "reasonable" arguments, just try to allow them to be. Cold, business-like: "Come from? All right, stay. Please. Live as you want. Only I have other things to do, you like something for yourself".

Fears ofigevayu from such insolence. Begin to noticeably shrink in size. They only grow when they are afraid. They should admit they are already at least two times less.

2) go to your fears

This is the aerobatics and it works. Do what you fear the most valuable advice I have ever heard. If in the first case, the fears are reduced and at least cease to scoff at you, if you get them to move, they run away.

Not to say that I fully own the tools. For example, I'm afraid to jump with a parachute, and I'm not going to do that, let it hundred times useful for my consciousness, but on the other hand this fear and not a nightmare every day, another question, when talking about how to leave, to quit, to change, to create, open, run, to risk, to love, I'm just doing what you fear. And that's all. At least in the beginning and very scary. I'm not trying to be cured, not trying to stamp them out – just doing. At your own risk.

Do what you must, and come what may

To reinvent themselves – it is not easy to maintain clarity of mind and body alone, is the ability to extend it further – to begin their family, friends, and then, if you have enough internal capacity, and to the whole world. published

Olesya Novikova

Source: re-self.ru/page/10