Archetypes and roles of women of eight ages

For a woman to be happy and fulfilled, she needs to live a certain role with her tasks and images at the right time. How do you know which archetype is not fully lived? And is there a chance to catch up at an older age? Yeah. To do this, we need to look into the past and look at what happened in different periods.

Girl from birth to 6-8 years

Ask your mother what happened to you in the first few hours after birth. Was everything smooth and the birth natural and quick, or did you fight for life? The answers to these questions will show you how you win in life. The first experience determines whether a woman is single-handedly striving for success or whether she feels she needs other people and technology around. Children born as a result of cesarean section are less motivated and interested in any victories. Also, the experience of birth will unconsciously determine the attitude of a woman to pregnancy and motherhood in general.

How was your first year of life? If during this period there were serious quarrels between parents or difficult moves, then the little girl could develop distrust of the world and other people (especially men). At an older age, this topic will need to be addressed. If in the first year, the child was cared for, fed, touched, taught to express emotions and desires, then in older age such a woman will be naturally feminine, open and accepting.

From the year to seven, the child learns to realize his value, confidence in the web, his "separation", builds his boundaries with others. How was that stage with you? Who helped you at that age? I have heard many times from child psychologists that the development of a child, especially girls, is extremely bad for loading a child 3-5 years of learning several foreign languages and reading. From the point of view of archetypal cycles, the explanation is simple: our confidence and value will be directly related to social achievement and academic success. And so a woman of 40 years goes for another diploma, hoping in this way to feel valuable.

The first class is a crisis (each of the periods will end in a crisis, it will be the transition to the second level). How did you break up with your mother’s skirt? Was school desirable and classmates interesting? What helped me get into the new environment?

Teenage girl from 6-8 to 14-15 years

The shadow side of the archetype of the Daughter, from the mastered role of the universal favorite, you need to go into a small robber. Elementary school is a time of socialization, when a girl learns to communicate with those whom she did not choose. She finds her place in the group of children and understands her role: an excellent student for cheating, a girl with whom everyone is in love or a thunderstorm of the district, taking away gum and pocket money. First love, serious friendship, teachers who are “wrong” – the girl has her own opinion and attitude to what she is offered.

How did you live that period? How was the relationship with the children? What role did you play in the classroom? If you changed schools at that age, why and did you correct the mistakes of your previous reputation in your new school? To whom did you listen, accept, or challenge what your teachers taught you? During this period, the girl needs to learn to be responsible: to see the consequences of her actions and to accept a reward or punishment for them. If there are younger children in the family and the girl is made obligated to follow them, then they can too early “push” into the archetype of the mother. Ideal: help your mom, follow your younger ones (responsibility training), but sometimes be able to give up and go about your business. If a girl dumps a broken flower pot on a dog, and the teacher blames the poor assessment, then this period will last later.

The crisis of this age is puberty, the first menstruation and the understanding of oneself as a woman. During this period, the girl understands that her mother is not a goddess, but one of the adult women: in some ways she is right, in some things she is not, and psychological separation occurs. It also happens that the parents did not let the child rebel: they punished for disobedience, did not let them make mistakes and see the results of their transgressions, did not let them walk on their own, and so on, then the girl calms down and remains a “mother’s daughter” taking only the bright side of this archetype, and refusing powerful resources of the dark side. In adulthood, this manifests itself as a lack of understanding of one’s desires = “Tell me what to do/who to marry/what do I want?”

Attachment to the mother and her opinion: from the choice of clothes to classes in their spare time. Misunderstanding of her strength and value: after all, the girl was not in trials and did not understand that she is capable of much and generally wow! Interestingly, during this period, children begin to actively lie, from the age of three our mirror neurons allow you to do this, but the lie is multi-step and sophisticated. Who and what did you lie about during this time? That’s why you may still be afraid of being rejected. Take a look at what you’ve been doing over the years: it’s the best job for you.

Girl from 14-15 to 21-23 years

The bright side of the beloved archetype, the key theme of this period: choice. The ability to consider, evaluate, make decisions, choose and make results, all on their own.

In these years, there is still so little experience, but there are important events in the life of a woman: the first sexual relationship, earned money, choice of profession. As with birth, the first experience will affect later life, but it can be rethought if something goes wrong. For example, if the first money was earned hard or vice versa, received “for free”, then you will need to deal with the psychology of this issue and work with your attitudes. The best that adults can give in these years is a broader view of the world (the story as it happens) and encourage small mistakes.

The worst is the state of finality and the “path traveled”: you made a choice and hold on to it; you promised to keep it; you agreed to it – you can’t change your mind anymore; you’ve already done so much – finish it. As in chess, touch a piece - walk. And it turns out that a girl who after the first month of dating with a young man is disappointed, but is afraid to offend him and does not know how to offer a breakup. A student in the second year understands that she chose the wrong university, but her parents insist that she should finish her studies. If there was no real search for herself as such and the choice of a man or profession turned out to be imperfect (and often it is), then at an older age a woman will either find her own strategy of trial, error and decision. Or he will try to avoid decisions in principle, shift it to others, pull until the situation resolves itself.

The crisis of this period comes as a result of taking responsibility for yourself in all areas: from alcohol and casinos to deciding where to work and who to live with. The rebellious girl also had freedom, but rather “freedom from”, here “freedom for”, not just to do something else, but to express her desires through it. 3D Freedom: Physical, Material and Psychological If you are at this age for any reason did not become free, then allow yourself now to go back there and replay the choices that may weigh on you and dissatisfy you. By the way, it is during this period that laid down techniques in style accompany a woman for many years. Maybe it's time to reconsider.

Young woman from 21-23 to 28-30 years

The Dark Side of the Beloved Archetype. The theme of trials and struggle for the perfect choice, the first great crisis of life. In the previous stage, the woman searched, tried and chose as if touching water in the sea with her fingers, and now it is time to test the strength of her solution. Through struggle, difficulty, and competition, it proves, first of all, to itself, and by the way to other people, what it is worth. One of the pitfalls of this period is to say that “a man should” continue down the list: earn money, protect against detractors, reach for a woman. Or rather, a man can do all this if he is in the same phase, but what if he has gone through it before? Or is it just coming in the future?

This period helps a young woman to mature, gives her the strength and aggression of a tigress, teaches her again to earn lost money, a torn dress, a tarnished reputation. The second trap of pseudofemininity, to solve "well, fine": not to return a loved one, not to work hard at work, want everything to work by itself, and if on the second day of the diet you want a bun, then a bad diet. At this time, a woman looks back at her friends and wonders about the meaning of life: young mothers worry about an unfinished career; careerists about not getting married and not having children; creative about instability; materialists about how to learn to draw and music. Therefore, the third impasse will be carried away by other people's dreams and values, and the temptation is great - because the years go by and it is so scary not to have time for the main thing. If you are now going through this period, then the “main” can be seen at the same age of hobby classes from 6-8 to 14-15 years.

Women from 28-30 to 35-37 years

The bright side of the Mother archetype is to calm down, relax, be happy with what you have. Think of the themes of a woman’s earlier life. She had socialized, learned to make decisions, stood up for her choices, and fought to the end...and it was time to meet femininity. Of course, if a woman’s personal relationship or profession does not suit her, she can change it, but the wisdom of this stage is to take the same experience with her in all future changes. Not to start with a clean slate, not to chase achievements and not to do everything yourself, but to allow other people (for fairy-tale heroines these are magical assistants) to share your experience, learn from you and understand your strength. In the archetype of the Lover, a woman trained in creating pairing relationships: me and a man, me and work, me and a child. At this stage, her gaze expands, from the beam of a flashlight it turns into a round lamp. It becomes less important for her to understand something herself than to help others see themselves in her light. She does not help others directly, she does not spend her time and energy to get someone out of a difficult situation - no, she just lives, walks her own path and shines for herself, which does not prevent others from warming up or seeing something.

What exactly does it inspire? Tough question. If in the early stages she became a mother, then she realizes this event and decides to make a business project that solves her task personally and is able to help other mothers. If the results at the level of the mistress archetype are quite fast, and the projects are short, then the development can go on for several years and you need to be patient to get what you need with small and large adjustments. If a woman built a career in the early stages, then here she too will want to transform her experience into creativity. Whether she opens her own business or works for someone else, her “give me” attitude will become motherly, caring and aware. Such a woman also helps a man to comprehend his path: here he does something, achieves, receives. Why? What is its purpose and uniqueness? Such a woman helps him find meaning, and therefore get inspiration for a new hike, swim or battle, after which he will return to their home with gifts. Taking care of others, motherhood has extended her personal boundaries to the size of a family, company, or nation. She is happy when those around her are happy and she knows how to do it.

The crisis of this period is that she, as the mistress of her lands, must from time to time get rid of weeds: unnecessary but beautiful things in the attic; workers who are good people, but do not give the desired result; ideas that fascinate, but threaten to devour all supplies for the winter. And it's hard, because on the bright side of the archetype, you want to be nice and nice to everyone.

Adult woman from 35-37 to 42-44 years

During this period, a woman experiences the dark side of the Mother archetype, perhaps for the first time in her life she pays close attention to her inner world.

If at the previous level children were born, but here they become independent and even adults. If a good business is created, it scales from a room in the basement to a large office, from an office to a network, then to other cities and countries. It is time to let go of what was your essence, but the woman is still full of energy and creativity. She needs to find pleasure in active waiting, pleasant solitude. The main theme of this level is to understand that your value is not what you can do, how you care and help others, and not your beauty of body and face, but something completely different.

The ability to wonder? Attitude to life? Feel people? It’s time to master a new talent and add it to the previous experience for a new identity. Relationships with spouse, parents, children and friends also change – this is a living process, and for harmonious living you do not need to hold on to the old formats, but creatively rethink and create something new, possibly unacceptable and indecent at an early age.

If the previous stages were not completed, then this period can be very bitter. Did you not receive warmth and confidence in the world in the Daughter archetype? Can frantically seek a new profession, without using the experience of past occupations for their development, compete with young girls "in their field" and suffer bitterly from incongruity. The woman didn't learn Beloved's lessons? Here she will suffer from wrinkles on the face and changing body proportions, do plastic surgery and buy youthful clothes, because apart from appearance she does not know how to seduce another person, how to be interesting and bright for herself. Didn't live the bright side of Mother? Will struggle to keep children close to themselves, to prevent them from developing, growing up and living their lives (with business similarly).

The crisis of this period, which gives the transition to the next archetype, is that a woman answers for herself the question “Who am I, what do I want, what do I do and why?” and proceeds to realize the real dream, since she has already fulfilled all social tasks and there are no more excuses left:

Mature woman 42-44 to 49-51

The bright side of the mentor archetype. In women, social activity aimed at their own success decreases, but involvement in their personal development increases. Travel, heartfelt conversations, a new craft for the soul. As you remember, at the previous stage, the woman thought about her dream, now she already has time for this and a lot of strength and inspiration.

Feminine wisdom and royal dignity, which are formed thanks to the archetypes lived before, make this woman a welcome guest in all structures where balanced opinion and experience are important: education, medicine, politics, investment structures. Even if she did not manage people before, she will be approached and listened to advice.

If the dark side of the Mother was lived correctly, then such a woman got rid of friendship out of habit, let her children go into adulthood and achieved a new sincerity with her husband. She can enter into a new relationship, and at this level the formal side of love, the stamp in the passport and the opinion of friends will not matter.

In the same cycle, a woman's parents die, and it's a shock that life has an end. But it is important to accept that now you are the “older generation” and live your life without other people’s projections and evaluations. At the same age, a woman can begin the first serious diseases, and the archetypes here can also be a clue: the gynecological sphere speaks of an underlived mistress, a tumor about a daughter. And if the acceptance of a life in which there are deaths and illnesses has occurred and the lessons are learned, then the Light Teacher uses the gifts of earlier lived archetypes: becomes curious and cheerful as a Daughter; sharp on the tongue and passionate as a Lover; creating and helping as a Mother; and to this is added wisdom and a holistic view of the world of the Teacher. She rethinks the goals of life and her inner circle. The daily feeling of the worthlessness of each day and the people around her is her mantra!

The Wise Woman from 49-51 to Infinity

The dark side of the mentor archetype. If a woman lived the previous periods in time and harmoniously, then this one can become the longest and most fulfilling in her life. Why? Well, the duration is due to the achievements of medicine, and the fulfillment is due to the fact that we do not forget the experience and lessons of the previous archetype when we move to a new one, so all the qualities and resources of the early years accumulate.

Unfortunately, almost no one manages to live “excellent girls” to these years, especially often a woman gets stuck in the Mother’s archetype: feeds, cares, reminds about wearing a hat, supports her children with money and unnecessary advice. This is because, apart from rare books and films about older women, we know very little, and the role of the mother is visible and socially supported. At this stage, grandchildren appear, if a woman has not found herself, she strives to be needed and lives for them and her adult children. The second scenario, if the previous archetypes have not been filled in, is that a woman begins to live them in all possible forms, including through clothes, “playing back” for the past, trying to regain her bygone youth.

If the bright side of the Mentor has been rejected and the woman is not ready to look at herself and the relationship in a new way, then she can fixate on the past, start blaming others for the mistakes of her life, become a petty, envious and greedy old woman. In the successful version of this period, there is a rethinking and awareness of life, the conclusions of which help to continue to search for answers to important questions in books and travel. He is looking for new meanings in his life and in the universe. It is becoming more and more free from social conventions, which means it is open to real creativity and creativity. This is the power and inexplicable attraction of Baba Yaga: the initiation of a new generation, the transmission of a taste of life and the creation of real trials, through which they learn and prepare for a big life. It populates the previously re-conscious world with new actions and creativity. published

Source: annasharlay.com/blog/posts/ages-archetypes/