"We played yesterday at the Playground!" – says the neighbor. "You've walked today?" – asked grandma. "To take you into the weekend in the Park to get some air?" – plans for the father of your child. You only sigh: just a simple walk quickly turns from fun to a serious test for all participants.
Perhaps your idea of a perfect pastime in the fresh air with the baby is not too match with the daily objective reality. That's how our kids, that sedate walking the handle does not suit them. Why do the street children do not behave as we would like, and how to reduce the number of conflicts to a minimum?
Situation 1: a minute Palavas little in awe of the fact of leaving the house. Doesn't really matter where you are going – to the nearest yard to swing on the swings or in the supermarket for groceries, to pay rent or to visit grandma, a child humming with energy. You have tortured this ability does not stop even for a minute, constantly running off somewhere, to drop, to touch what he couldn't drop. Are you tired of answering endless questions. You would just prefer that the child remained at home and gave you the ability to do all the planned things with no fuss. Otherwise, you again and again can't concentrate, and just do that grab, shake, pull up, calling for silence and apologize to others. But a boy asks to borrow it, promising to behave...
What to do? Clearly define rules and specify them in advance. "In a large store, there is the danger to get lost, so you can either sit in the cart or hold onto it"; "other dogs can't touch – they bite"; "Near the road at the crosswalk just go hand in hand with the mother." Before you leave home, choose a time when baby is calm and able to perceive the information, and quietly explain what behavior you expect from the child: "the street will be a lot of people and cars. Please, try to listen to what I tell you, do not bother others and remember that can be dangerous."
Recall that all the time: at home or on the Playground, the child can make noise and have fun all you want, but on the street and in shops have to be obedient and to control their behavior. Of course, all of these conditions you must repeat infinite number of times in the months and years, but sooner or later your patience will be rewarded.
In advance give the child a task: for example, count the red cars or to remember what dogs you met along the way. Remind about the task and enjoy the five minutes of silence.
Your yesterday a good little boy refuses to go by the hand? No wonder he started the next stage of growing up. Rules of behavior on the street you will have to repeat the child an infinite number of times. Scenario 2: Kid cries on weaponshield squealing your kid already know all the neighbors. It is naughty in the street and tries to lie down on the pavement, he argues with you for any reason and shouts that he is not little anymore. And you just asked him to leave the house two tanks and be limited to the bulldozer and concrete mixer. Please "Give a hand, the road is" causing a storm of outrage, and offer to shake on a swing little brother is screaming that he wants nothing to do with the brother nothing. Sharing toys in the sandbox takes rampant.
What to do? Be logical and consistent explanations: the one who yells, screams and lying, it is physically difficult to hear and understand, much less help him. Firmly ask the child to clearly tell what was troubling him. Promise to solve this problem and don't forget to fulfill the promise: the toy can walk with you on a walk in basis, and the younger brother to take part in interesting outdoor game. And in the end do not use the phrase "You're too young to..." But still show him that there are more adults and children who go with their parents by the hand and don't think it's something horrible.
Before going into a lively Playground once again speak with the child the rules: "you can't run and fight and take someone else's; if you really want something, it is necessary first to say this and not cry."
Home to the walk, ask your child to give you a sign if he wants to shout: for example, raise your hand higher or stick out his tongue. Work out together.
Situation 3: the Child gets tired in magazinehome at the beginning of the shopping trip everything is going pretty well: the child quietly goes beside you, not whining and not asking quickly to finish the event. But after 5-10 minutes the child's behavior changes dramatically: he becomes boring. This means that you can run from your mom, to hide among the cans of green peas or enough to crawl over the freshly scrubbed floor. And, you can every thirty seconds to ask: "Mom, is that all?" Of course, it can be understood: in the purchase of napkins and ham is not exciting. All this on the background queue and the need not to forget anything strongly irritates you.
What to do? To avoid such development of events, give the child the opportunity to fully participate in the process: to carry a package with valuable contents, to choose a cereal for Breakfast or pushing around a cart. At the checkout ask him to put the products. The baby will feel really useful and you can forget about your frustration and desire to run to the store.
Assign the baby a priority for today's trip to the store. He may prepare even at home: find out what products you want to buy, write or draw a list of necessary, and the store will take control over procurement and command packaging of products.
Situation 4: a Small belectric he was here, and now... It can happen anywhere: the first child ran out of the house or in the shop decided to review something without telling you. It is especially hard to follow his movements, if you must deal with a younger child. You are already seriously thinking about the signaling the chip to not shudder each time, again not finding the top of his head next.
What to do? Did you find him? Keep calm. To scold, of course, possible, but try to find a balance between his own emotions and a confident explanation of why so you can never do. When the chaos subsides, explain in detail the reasons for your anger: "to be alone in a strange place is dangerous"; "you can't get out of the car first – so you can get hit by other cars". In any case, when your child puts himself at risk because of disobedience, need to react to it.
In a situation when you are forced to be distracted from the child, for example to pay for purchases or to fill out a receipt, ask for it as loud as you can sing a song or tell a poem it will be easier to track his movements. Enter "rule engine", go to the Elevator and out of the entrance, just holding each other, and the most important comes first (of course, this is your baby), and shows the way.
Keep a balance between your own emotions and explaining why to run away from parents in any case impossible. Situation 5: a Little poproshayka street child asks kinder surprises, candies and chips in the shop – coloring machine. You would not mind to please him, but, first, you have your plans, and secondly, I would not want to encourage whining and greed.
What to do? To discuss in advance and in detail plan trips. Plan expenses together with your child: "we Have the money for the products we all buy and check out: if something remains, we will be able to choose something delicious for everyone." Possible, carry on a walk something to eat: dried, sliced Apple or a juice. It is possible that the baby is really hungry, but bright wrapper in the window reinforced the feeling of hunger.
Select one day a week to buy during a walk something nice for a child's choices, but limit the amount. If the baby is not familiar with the numbers, he will have to help to map the available quantity of money and price desired: "we Have 30 rubles, these candies cost 10 rubles, stickers – 25 what do you like more?" published
Author: Natalia Chudina
P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©