The crisis of middle age?

About the terrible and imminent midlife crisis I've heard for a long time. At some point bookstores filled trash like "How to become a millionaire in 10 days", "856 ways to convince a person to buy an unnecessary book" and of course "How to overcome a midlife crisis".

As the crisis – no parsnips and it is impossible to condemn it without reading it, I have long ago delved into the literature on the issue. Well, to know that threatens the years and that "forewarned is forearmed".

Since then, every morning I Wake up with fear and think:

— And if I don't want to fall into a deep depression over the fact that my childhood dreams have not been implemented, and the time has gone and a bald spot in the offing? And I'm still not an oligarch and in my mansion still not riding regiment of maids in black stockings and mini-skirts. Not spit do me on everything and go volunteer in the French Legion?

I do not want to fall into depression. Don't want to be young and, leaving all, to go on a lifetime fishing with hunting. I do not want all. Fishing occasionally want, but then I just go and not dream about it.

Never had a midlife crisis. Not been and will not be, because nothing in my life, I've never done and just because it is supposed to, not because I want to. Married because you love to, not because it is long overdue. My son was born and then a daughter because the parents were want grandchildren, and I was tormented by the question who I will give my name just because I wanted a son and then a daughter.

I am getting the results of life, even intermediate and don't count their achievements. Not because it's a minor something, but because a lot of things can and are going to do. I was not immersed in the deep gloom of my friends who have smart housing, car or more money – I'm comfortable where I live, my financial status allows me to not live in poverty, and I do not like to drive a car.

When a person summarizes, on a subconscious level, made he leaves behind and wants change. It can be frustrating that not done so much, and that change is long overdue. To me, in varying degrees, like what I was doing because I had done it for themselves or for their loved ones. And to part with it, in most cases, I do not want. And change for the better in my life, whatever it is – buying bigger flats, the release of new books or simply new comfortable shoes make me happy, albeit in different degrees, but still happy, and not upset by the fact that new shoes 42 year – is minuscule, compared to what peers buy a controlling stake in lucrative businesses.

Oppressive uncertainty would be less in comparison with, for example, the time of receipt of the first degree when it is unclear what I want to do, where and how it will succeed. Somehow it happened by itself. Yeah, I didn't become a famous and rich rock musician, but I find that it played in the group and I did enjoy it. I was not shown on the first channel in the program "KVN", but it was extremely fun to play as him for the past five years, in less pretentious venues.

And I really see no reason to be depressed just because I can refuse luck and he shot me in less than have lived. At the age of 42 I understand that "acting stupid" and "to be young" is absolutely not the same thing, because I do not want to get oneself in tight pants, paint the gray hair in bright colors and go to the disco until the morning. And even if I want to, it will be just because I want it right now, not because I never did and I need quickly to catch up for old age is not far off.

I have no desire to have a young mistress, to buy a Ferrari, skydiving, start to play sports just to prove to myself or anyone else that "in as I can." I can try something from all of this, but certainly not to prove something to himself or, which is much more stupid to someone else.

I fully understand that the attractiveness of a man caused more by the charisma, judgment, and confidence than appearance, because I do not want to do something with the wrinkles or transplanted a hair from some places on the head.

And I really think that the concept of "midlife crisis" was coined, or by some zaturkanny man to justify some of his pranks, or therapists to make the people in a bad mood.

About what I would recommend to a friend, experienced a midlife crisis myself... If we ignore the profanity, in General terms, the Council would have sounded like, "Drop of soul-searching". It's like the difference between headache and migraine is a man who has a headache, takes a pill, unlike a person with a migraine which drug refuses and prefers to lie on the couch and to harass their family, shouting, "God! I have a headache!".

Bad mood – do something that brings pleasure. Nothing brings the fun – go to sleep. Want to drink – drink. I want to change jobs – please. I want to buy the car – for God's sake. Just do it because you're really, not because "I'm 35 and I still have no car."

And do, please, so as not to look stupid. In the end, you're a man, and in order to feel younger, you don't have to behave like an energetic idiot. Well or behave, but not because "when if not now?" but just because you're energetic an idiot, and this fact pleases you. published


P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©


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