Have some respect for yourself Bashny.Net

I periodically suffer from low self-esteem. And before that, in childhood and adolescence, suffering from high. Surprisingly, but in fact it is the same, both the lack of self-esteem. Going back and forth all my life between the ego and self-abasement, but the truth, as always, is somewhere nearby.





It would seem that such a natural thing, but how few people possess it to the full. When a person respects himself, and it forms certain attitudes of others. To put it in short: respect yourself, others respect you.

Treat yourself to neglect and consider themselves unworthy of respect from others? Be sure, that necessarily use. As my grandma used to say: "Sit on the neck and legs dangling". And it's not in humility — Oh, I'm so bad, all around better than me, so I'm all should.

To respect yourself means to value their personal interests, and to have clear boundaries of personal space. By the way, people who are prone to talkativeness and openness (nice to meet you, it's me), at some point it becomes difficult to respect yourself, because in the end is too open borders. Your identity becomes public and the public is not shy usually. But even if no one said anything nasty and used to the benefit of your openness, self esteem often suffers. Well, you know, talk over and painful then I think — Oh, what a fool I must look...

And worst of all, attempts to respect yourself, your dignity, stumble on Christian prejudice. Not supposed to respect themselves. Who are you? You have to think the worst! Other options — at least, unworthy of the pride, if not a hell of a pride. So I have long thought, and like already neophytes-that is long gone. But still shudder with horror if suddenly when he said a good, or thought, or, horror of horrors, boasted of its achievement — Oh, a vain, arrogant man!

But the word "respect" is similar to the word "uwagi" (akin in many Slavic languages), which means "attention". That is "treated with respect" means "to relate closely". And to others and to yourself. Is it a sin? On the contrary, very helpful in the spiritual life, and soul. Self-esteem is an attentive attitude, and hence a sober assessment of their advantages and disadvantages. The word "sober" is the key here. I think if you approach from this side, then everyone, including low self-esteem, will be able to find not one, not two advantages, hence, it will always be something to respect themselves.

By the way, here is side by side, and the pride of worth. That which is pride, and that that dignity. What is a healthy pride — it's just a joy because you possess some virtues. I began to perceive a sense of pride when beginning to evaluate their creative work, including to assess in monetary terms. Yes, I am proud that I can draw so, this is my personal achievement. And Yes, I appreciate it so, and not otherwise, because I respect their work.

Or, for example, I am proud to be able to run a number of kilometers, this is also my personal achievement. And I can be proud of their children because of their achievements, I also somehow involved. And proud parents, friends, work, country, all, to which I feel connected. But as soon as you start the process of comparing yourself with others, here and ends with a healthy pride and pride. I am proud of my country because of its merits, not because it is better than other countries. And this pride does not negate the understanding and its drawbacks too. Same with the rest.

You, in fact, do not have to worry about what did or did not do other, worse they are than you, or better. While the man evaluates his actions by comparing himself with others, he's clean. As soon as he begins to think — what I have done that I ran the 10 kilometers, "faster than Bob (or Bob could not run, and I ran"), here she comes, pride.

That's why self esteem is so important is a healthy feeling, not sinful, unlike pride. Including in more narrow aspects, such as male or female self-esteem. Of course, I can circumvent this issue. For women self-esteem is especially important in connection with the centuries-old Patriarchal structure of the world.

In understanding my grandmother's women's self-esteem included different directions. For example, an appearance — there was certain criteria. You should always look neat and clean, and not expensive, fashionable style and brightness of clothes and hairstyles. And not in comparison with the neighbor! Good haircut, neat nails, clean shoes, ironed clothes — here is an indication of respect in appearance.

In matters of relationship building with men's self-esteem is almost the first thing that is necessary for normal family life. A woman should always clearly understand that if she does not respect herself, the man won't respect her even more! And then no excuses to not be especially religious, "humble" --like, I guess I don't deserve another, so I should be. Derogatory, contemptuous attitude does not deserve any one person (if, of course, does not deliberate nastiness), a woman or a man. Regardless of talents, abilities, and other contingent advantages. Respect, that is, attention to his interests and needs, on the contrary, worthy of every, and woman no less than man. Therefore, any dismissive attitude characterizes a person down with the baser side.

I see one everyday example of how she gradually gains self-respect after years of humiliation. And it contributes to a sharp change of attitude towards her men, who for many years was looked down upon. Yes, the marriage ended, the love is gone, and yet it is a small victory! It's great to see how people is changing. And this is not the first positive example of how a woman starts to respect themselves in spite of all the humiliation!

Speaking of self-respect not to mention the fact that people who can not respect himself, cannot respect others. Unable to bow, to fear, but not respect. And the most common feeling that a man feels, — envy, I wouldn't know. Instead of joy over the dignity of another, instead of admiration, instead of the inspiration of his example — always envy. If the person does not see self-worth, self-esteem, how can he see and appreciate this in others?

The easiest and most affordable way to learn to respect yourself and others — stop comparing. I think that with a little effort it can be done by anyone. After all, to live in respect for yourself and others much easier and happier! published

Author: Elizabeth Pravikova

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

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Source: www.matrony.ru/pache-gordosti-ili-imey-uvazhenie-k-sebe/