What 25-year-old cry Bashny.Net

Meet. This is Lucy.





Lucy - representative of the generation Y: people born in the late 70's - early 90-ies. Now they are 20-30 years old, they have finished high schools and are now working. If they work in a big city and are engaged in intellectual work, they are called "Yuppie» - young urban professionals, young professionals living in the city. Lucy just such.

In general, she all is well. But she is not very happy, why?

Let's understand first, where does happiness. Surprisingly, the formula is simple:





Nothing tricky. If you expect more than you get - you're unhappy. If on the contrary - happy.

Interestingly, the objective reality is of secondary importance. She does not make a person happy or unhappy - only in combination with expectations. If the child is expected birthday games console "Xbox" and got the bike "Merida", he is likely to be upset. If he was expecting at least a bike, but I got this whole "Merida", he will jump up to the ceiling.

With happiness figured that to be happy you need to reality exceeded expectations. From Lucy inflated expectations?

To better understand this, look at her parents.





Grandparents Lucy - the representatives of "the greatest generation." They grew up in difficult times. In early adolescence they had seen poverty and unemployment. And grandparents during the war or served or worked in the factory, where they met.

Grandparents married (mass, the scale of an entire generation), and their children are born. There is a population explosion. Grandparents teach their children that the most important thing in life - a stable job and a steady income. They want their lives food was delicious, and the grass - green. And their children, parents Lucy grow up with the idea of ​​a stable and long-lasting career. Here such:





Lucy's parents know that they will get to this green lawn. You just have to work hard:





Parents successfully ill hippie culture in the 70s and happily took up their careers. And then in the '80s and' 90s the world is experiencing unprecedented growth. It grows everything and in all sectors, money rod from all the cracks, only manage to earn.

Our heroes - brave and confident people. They worked hard and honestly earned even more than planned. And we bought the house better, and creating a pleasant life. From this maturity they had the general feeling of satisfaction with life:





Lucy's parents did not have before the eyes of the war and the protracted economic crisis. They believe that everything will always be good - just need to work hard. And they raised their Lucy in the same tradition, but in a more exaggerated way: if her possibilities are endless, and Lucy (and its peers) can be anyone wants.

Begins nineties. The television showed the young "Backstreet Boys" and live Cobain, and little boys and girls absorbed the idea that they are unique, their possibilities are limitless, but in life it around the green light. Moreover, it is not appropriate Sad fate of parents who have just financial stability. Stability - is boring. In the life of Generation Y have amazing things to happen. On their lawn necessarily blossom flowers:





Hence the first thing about Lucy, which is important to understand:

Lucy prohibitively ambitious.





Lucy and her peers do not just want a comfortable life and prosperity. It's too small for them. Lucy expects her career lawn a lot more than just reliability and safety. At the time, the parents of the generation of large Childbirth like to live in a brighter future, these representatives of Generation Y want to live exclusively in particular their personal bright future.

Writer and researcher Cal Newport traced the rise in popularity of the phrase "follow your dreams» (follow your passion), which took place in the last 20 years. For the analysis tool used Ngram Viewer: it shows how often in the English-speaking press meet certain phrases. Compare how falling popularity of "stable operation» (a secure career) and growing popularity of the "work for the soul» (a fulfilling career):









I must say, Lucy and her peers want material prosperity no less than their parents. But at the same time, they want to work satisfying. This is not even their parents thought.

But Lucy is not only prohibitively ambitious. From early childhood, it is rooted in another idea, gleaned from their parents:







And then it's time to talk about the second aspect of Lucy and her friends:

They live in a fantasy world.

"Well, yes, of course, we will in the life of happiness and success. And we will find a job and earn a liking to her. But I have something special. So, my way of life will also be special, I will leave a trace in history and exalted above the crowd ", - thinks Lucy in the classroom in the University.

And here we have a whole generation Lyus that are not only convinced that their lawn blossom flowers. Every single Lucy is convinced that as soon as she finished high school, it would be especially beautiful lawn, -

and soar above the magic pony unicorn:





It's misleading to play a cruel joke with Lucy when she graduated.

If parents Lucy preparing for years of hard work, the Lucy rest assured that it something so special and wonderful, the work will be given easily. You just have to choose the direction of the shower and wait for her talent discovered. But the trouble is that thinks so every em> from the generation Y. Because they are special! Even now, a typical representative of the "y" is reading this article and thinking, "Huh, not bad word, but actually I'm actually one of the few really special" - and that's the problem.

Expectations Lucy before the start of a career look like this:





But, alas, the real work - the blood, sweat and tears, even if you do not metite on colorful lawn with unicorns. To build undistinguished, but at least a stable career, it will take many years of hard work. Such a life is not Lucy's ready. It is expected that now is a year or two, and she will become the new Jobs, Zuckerberg.

But she would not, he was worth not enough. And she is not ready to accept it.

Professor Paul Harvey of the University of New Hampshire, recognized lyusived and psychologist, studied the philosophy of people-generation Y. It notes that its representatives "have unrealistic expectations of life and unjustifiably high opinion of himself" and "painful resist criticism." "Do not be putting enough effort, these people, however, continue to expect significant rewards from life - writes Harvey - and continue to be disappointed».

Despite the fact that Lucy currently the highest opinion, his view of reality. That's where our Lucy is two years after high school:





Our heroine has built an unrealistic expectation of work, and, of course, disappointed. Due to the mismatch of expectations and reality, she is unhappy.

But that's not all. There is another problem, which exacerbates the situation Lucie.

above it all as if bullied.

It is clear that among the generation of parents Lucy someone richer and someone happier. But since most of these people have lived life without Facebook, they are not really aware of how career evolved peers. They lived himself and went about their business, looking at best lawn neighbor.

But Lucy pursues newfangled social phenomenon: nonsense on Facebook.

Because social networks Lucy lives in a world in which a) people constantly publish information about themselves; b) what they publish, often not the case; c) generally surrounding share their successes and failures keep quiet.

If you look at a typical page on Facebook classmate Lucy, there will be continuous party, meet famous people, foreign travel, gifts from fans and expensive restaurants. And nowhere it is written that she actually earns as a waitress at the club, took money from my parents, but these roses bought herself. This is called "construction of the image».

Because of this, Lucy develops the feeling that all the terms of all the great, and she is one such fool, nothing in life is not achieved.





That's why Lucy feels out of place. And although she is likely to start his career very well, she is tormented by feelings of worthlessness.

What can advise such as Lucy:

Staying the same ambitious. The world lacks the capacity to implement, just need to pick up and do. Maybe things did not work out as you had planned, but something is definitely out. The main thing - to do. Stop to consider himself special. The truth of life is that you are an inexperienced young man, who so far have nothing to offer the world. To appear, you need to work long and hard. Do not look around. Who does not cost anything to create an image of a wealthy and successful man. If your friends and acquaintances appear to be successful, do not rush to conclusions. Maybe they just keep iPhone at a right angle. You also need to do their work honestly and from the heart - then no reason to envy others.





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