Advise how to love, of course, silly. Properly love - it's just love. But still I want to pay attention to the subtleties of relationships between women and men.
Love brings a lot of joy in the life of each of us, but often our inner fears and unresolved problems turn the joy of love in suffering and daily quarrels, and to clarify the relationship of mutual accusations.
If you could follow all the advice in the relations between men and women - it would be easy. Perhaps the happy couples and people would be much more.
No advice will not bring peace and harmony if these tips do not come out of your depth.
If your unconscious you do not respect a man and your inner world he has already devalued, then no matter how you tried to follow the advice and to be the right woman, the result will not be.
I think the greatest benefit in these councils is to know them better understand their weaknesses, reflect on their inner feminine condition of his deep perception of men.
First of all, we need to understand that the relationship is not so important external behavior as the internal state of each.
The man, oddly enough, loves above all his fortune with a woman. Depending on what it feels is his desire to be with her.
If he feels like a man with a woman, he will try to do my best for her.
The woman, too, must feel like a woman with a man, then she will see men there. But the primary responsibility for the state of women is a woman. Nobody will take care of you better than yourself. Alas, this is so.
Properly love - is, above all, take care of your internal state, mood and well being. Therefore, at the beginning of talk about us, women, and then our men, and how they love and how to love them.
As it is necessary to take care of his internal state?
1. Do not make your relationship with the man in charge for themselves, do not deprive your relationship life and joy.
If you work at 2-3 jobs, come home and the house falls on you, what kind of joy in a relationship can be a speech?
You should not be exhausting, tired, enough sleep - all this leads to the depletion of your energy, lack of energy and loss of mood, which affects all the family and is primarily on the man.
2. Take care of yourself and your state - it means to be able to hear themselves and their desires.
It is often willing to help and to please others, you forget about yourself. Well if you really care for others it brings you joy and you are charging.
For God's sake!
And if, on the contrary, exhausts you? So think about how to take care of yourself first.
Maybe properly distribute responsibilities in your family, learn to say NO, to feel the boundaries of their personal space and, in general, be it in reality as well as internally.
3. The right to love - it does not impose his love, do not strangle the man with love and not require him to love and attention.
The woman should take care of his inner world, that there is harmony and peace reigned. If you are overcome by the fear of being abandoned, become unnecessary, loneliness scares you and you do not see the joy in life without a man, that whether you like it or not, you will ruin your life and relationships.
Properly love - is not to lose yourself in a relationship, do not attempt to merge with a man as one, depriving himself and his personal space.
You should have your own interesting life without a man. Do not leave your interests, do not stop spending time with friends and family, do not dwell on the man as the most important one, the only one of interest.
Be able to dissolve in the man and not lose yourself and forget about everything and most importantly - do not forget to come back again to himself.
4. Take care of my condition - is to be able to enjoy the process.
When you are cooking, try to cook not the result - if only it was something to eat, and try to prepare as well as something from which you are in the process of cooking will enjoy.
Learn how to enjoy all that you are doing. Every morning, pay sebe15 - 20 minutes, stay alone, with a cup of your favorite tea or coffee, tune in to a pleasant wave of a new day.
5. The right to love - is first and foremost to be able to properly communicate.
It's hard to do when you capture the emotion, you're frustrated and resentful, so it is important to keep your inner world in order to deal with their grievances, the pain of the past. Getting rid of all the negative and disturbing live plants, then a wave of rage and anger will not engulf you and you will be able to control yourself in a conversation and choose the correct words.
When you are hurt, you are saved from their pain, hurting man, thus burn bridges to further understanding of each other.
With a man should be able to communicate "I messages" - to talk about their feelings: "I'm angry," "I'm angry," "I'm hurt," "I feel you are not required.
Then be sure to announce the reason because of which you feel all this and offer a solution that would suit you.
So you support a man his male state because "you messages" in which you accuse him always very negative impact on a man, and as a result you do not get anything, but still a lot of pain and hurt.
Must be able to safely and properly defend their positions and desires.
6. It is important to pay attention to your facial expressions and tone when you're talking to a man.
Without noticing, you can send signals to the man of your present attitude to it, which is hidden deep within you. Often you do not even guess about his true attitude towards him.
Attitude comes not with a particular man, with whom you live or meet. It consists of those plants that you have absorbed from her mother, relations that have been in your family, my mother's relationship to her father and men in general.
7. The right to love - it is able to be open and to speak directly, without a hint of his feelings, emotions, desires.
Men do not understand women flowery talk.
Self-confident woman will not insinuate she say directly about their desires.
Very often women because of the complex and uncertainty can not ask for and do not know how to take.
They somehow think that a man should guess everything myself, at times, forgetting simple things - to ask, but you will be heard. Their requests and desires must be able to voice chat, without hints.
Asking need to sincerely and at the same time, always leave a place in his heart for the refusal, but no doubt that the request may remain unfulfilled. And be sure to have patience. Every man his own perceptual speed. Someone needs a few days to fulfill your request and wish someone a few months. Asked forgotten. If it is important, write it on the list and attach a prominent place, periodically reminding.
Confident woman will rarely think about the refusal, and if they refused, the upset is not much, at least, does not connect this with the fact that it does not like.
When a woman asks a man sincerely, he feels the necessity and need. It maintains its state MEN.
8. The right to love - it is able to be grateful to be able to truly give thanks and rejoice in the fact that the man does, it is important to be able to see his good deeds, rather than focusing on the shortcomings.
Living next to a man, we begin to treat it as their own, completely forgetting that he individual. We begin to perceive everything emanating from it for granted, as if all this should be, and sometimes are not considering it necessary to say from the heart: "Thank you." It is important to say the stock phrases, and sincerely thank.
Getting a bit of unfamiliar people, we begin to thank them warmly, but her man we rarely pamper their gratitude.
9. The right to love - it does not wash dirty linen in public, telling my mom and girlfriends about how he's a monster.
Firstly, you do not expose yourself in the best light - you choose it and live with it.
And secondly, you undermine his authority and set up their loved ones against it, thereby chop off the branch on which sit. In difficult times, when the relationship crackling, it is unlikely your stories after someone close to you will help you keep them.
You can hear only one thing: "Why does he need you so?" This does not add respect for him.
10. The right to love - to know the language of love talking to your man, what is important - your embrace or deliciously cooked dinner, clean apartment or your praise, a little surprise.
This does not mean you have to communicate only on his love language, you own it (what you need to tell the man). It is advisable to keep this in mind. Sometimes a simple misunderstanding of the language of love leads to quarrels.
You can carefully remove the apartment, and he will feel unloved and unnecessary, because you do not have fried delicious cutlets, such as his mother cooked.
Or vice versa, you cook him dinner dishes from overseas, and he drew attention to litter in the house.
No need to try to be perfect in everything, just know when your man feels your love and care about him.
11. The right to love - it is also a respected man.
Moreover, respect has nothing to do with intimacy. Intimacy creates an attraction to each other for no reason and justification. Proximity may arise from the fact that someone is good to you, but it does not guarantee that you have a respect for the man.
In respecting always based on real achievements, not necessarily material and spiritual qualities that require no less work than material.
Any person has the qualities, achievements, for which he can be respected. It all depends on whether you see them or not.
Respect the man - is to respect the boundaries of his personal space and its desires.
Men are very sensitive to any pressure, they immediately begin to show stubbornness.
Loving a woman will not put pressure on the man, she will be able to express their wishes in a respectful manner, providing a choice for a man.
12. The right to love a man - is to believe in him, no doubt in him and his abilities.
Believe - is to see the potential, and if you do not see and do not believe in his ability and do not take not of their own, leave for another woman who sees in it that did not see you, and not because you are poor or unable to see just have a different angle of view.
Why is it so important to a woman take care of yourself first? Because the man is very sensitive to the mood of women, although not show it.
All that man does, he does it for the sake of women, families, children, and it is very important to see a woman happy and contented.
If a woman is angry and tired, a man receives information for themselves, "I am bad", "I can not make her happy," "She was with me bad." And who like to feel bad forever?
Sometimes a woman specifically demonstrated their dissatisfaction, wishing that the man thought about it and began to change their behavior or attitude, but the woman did not realize that her discontent and accusations have the effect of opposites - man closes.
Now you know how important it is to engage not only their appearance, but also their inner world? Being in harmony with yourself, you will create harmony around you.
Irina Gavrilova Dempsey