The student should know

Professors take exams and valerian.
Donating students and nerves.
***

Exam. One girl falls in a terrible way. Students stand in the hallway and think how to help her. One of them burst into the auditorium, where there is a test, and shouts:
 - Ivanova, you son was born!
Teacher wishes and sets a good estimate.
*** Best Breakfast Freshman - buterbrot.
Best Breakfast inveterate student - butylvrot.
***

Examination of Civil Defense. Long tormented student teacher, and finally sets the last, crucial question:
 - Answers - ex. and Wali on vacation, do not answer - at OPCS!
The question is: on your right a nuclear explosion ... your actions?
 - I turn into dust and radiation infect enemy!
***

The teacher tells the student:
 - You pristine student's record-book.
 - So be a man.