50 honest facts about how to raise a child of neurotic. Excellent selection

A selection of "bad advice" on the subject of raising children. Caution Toxic! Only adequate parents!

1. Solid decide that your child is in the form as it is - bad and nikchёmen. And it must be corrected. Trust yourself and convince the child that he was born corrupt and vicious, and the task of adults to make it a "real man." This is the basis for the formation of his neurosis.

2. Just put a realistic goal. A good example is your year-old child should learn to monitor the cleanliness of his clothes and care about your feelings, 3-year-old - to learn etiquette basics aesthetics of behavior and to distinguish morality from morality, 6-year-old should be able to sit for hours immobile without the possibility to scratch, 9-year-old - understand the basics of multi-valued logic and subjective idealism, 12-year-old - to determine its choices in life, 15-year-old to be able to genuinely regret that still can not make money and live independently.

3. Remember that the perfect child - it's an obedient child. After a couple of decades to all obedient children, and jerked the good fairy arrives and turns them into active and independent adults. Those parents who have to repeat their adult children "go do something," "do not sit at home," "we have found you a job - go 'cause sympathy and regret. Their child will likely not been sufficiently obedient. So she did not come.

4. In order to achieve the objectives concentrate on the elimination of wrong with the baby. Do not help a child learn new - it will be distracted from thinking about how bad it is.

5. Make sure that the child does not get the feeling of security - if it is to take root, in the future it will always be something to compare, and it will be unable to trust the scoundrels and swindlers. And what troubles of his miserable life, he then can you share? You have nothing to talk.

< 6. If you do not know, then you learn how to use generalizations: "you always", "you never", "you do" "All except you," "you always." The ideal of phrase: "you always always do everything wrong and never anything good of you will not wait».

7. Shout. It has long been observed that the speed of the sound wave coming from the adult approaches the baby drops significantly. Compensate for this effect.

8. Discontinue child when he interested in something. It can not be 2-year-old child, if of course it is normal, for the thirtieth time and again to return to step over a high threshold when it had already happened at the tenth attempt. He has twelve years, there is still the fact that the master of his body. Who for him is a more important goal - the observance of the daily routine.

9. Mock and punished for clumsiness. In general - often ridicule. Then he learns to be shy. And if he is miserable, then he would be considered safe and will not hurt, but will regret. Feel free to make fun of physical disabilities. There is nothing funnier than when the "teeth like a rat", "bulbous nose". More often ask: "But why are you so lop-eared?" In this case, the phrase "something you have become thick," turned to the girl, maybe it will open the way to glory. After all, the famous actress, anorexia and fame - synonyms.

10. used productively desire to imitate everything he sees and hears your child. He said even clumsily, but also you, the word "byat" - into a corner. I took your cigarette and walks in the form of "I smoke" - the pope. If he's doing this in three years, what happens next? I want to try as beautiful as you chop the tomato - hand. Put the laundry in the washing machine - pinch as if his electric shock. He once and for all must understand that by virtue of its original worthlessness, he is not worthy to become such what he sees these strong, skillful, knowledgeable adults.

11. accused child is what he learned from you. In an extreme case, to blame movies, kindergarten, his friends, school or genes grandparents on my mother's line, "which was exactly the same a terrible temper».

12. Comment on his actions. Be as critical. He has to get used to be better than he is, and never reach - it's now his job for life. Word-mates: "do not touch", "do not run", "do not cry", "sit exactly", "your hands give anything you can not," "it is better not do it", "once again to do so", "hands out one place, "" I give myself. " In the future, your voice must be the voice of the radio in his head, which can not be shut down, and even to understand what is heard is not their own thoughts, and broadcast the old program.

13. Do nothing to explain. Be guided by simple rules: it is always "small yet to understand something," and when "the rise - will understand." Use unclear wording "behave", "do not be a fool," "make people", "do the right thing." Let him know that there is a mysterious and complex things and their relationships, which are dedicated to all but him. Do not deprive yourself of future joy slight teenager because "does not understand basic things».

14. At the same time, give it to the educational centers, group day nursery. It is in your child's nature has not laid the ability of natural, organic for him translational knowledge of the world. It is better to know in what order and what he has to learn. You win if the first word he said is the word "square».

15. But if there is an opportunity as soon as possible give a kindergarten. Nursemaid with a group of 30 children will take care of it better than you. After all, a place I own child, even before it arrives, should be occupied by the collective opinion and I Natalia Albertovna that "offense is not good and be so proud when all the children are lined up in pairs and hold hands».

16. Assure the child in his omniscience. You see, and you know what he's doing, even when you are not around, reading his thoughts on the eyes, know in advance all of his intentions and that "here right now, he blatantly lied." In conjunction with the sophisticated punishments it will help him as soon as possible to meet with ghosts, monsters in the dark, fear of being alone. And boredom - is gone!

17. He should know that, among others, have common people, and so they never become him not. Compare it not for the benefit of the child with other children, sisters and brothers, and best of all with some other unknown to him or myself as a child. Other must always be better. In his past you - the absolute ideal. Otherwise, it spilled and most will not develop. Word-mates: "Do not know how to not try," "you can whenever you want", "you never will," "Here I am at your age", "look like other good at it", "you should be ashamed." < br />
18. of contracts with members of his family, so they encouraged him to do something for which you are being punished. And punish themselves for what yesterday praised. Prohibit and immediately allowed. Cancel their promises. Let the child understand that his behavior and the result is that he gets - the independent things. This develops a child's intelligence and intuition.

19. bogey bogeyman, the women-Yagami, wolves and policemen, who "will come and take away." And ghosts and monsters from the dark to join the monsters under the bed. And, in a large company, as you know, have fun. Sincerely ridicule his fears, as compared to yours, his monsters - a trifle. Oh, you know it.

20. in danger, but rather just when the opportunity is taken away from the child's toys, and favorite foods were given for good behavior. He needs to know that at any moment he could be deprived of something. So he grows greedy and not "some lohom».

21. Try not to give your baby what he needs. Let him know that the world's resources are extremely limited, and no one with them just does not intend to leave. The only way to get something - is to learn to steal. And by the way, do anything but envy can be a good stimulus for the development?

22. Compete with your child. At the same time you have to win more often, but it is always better. Indeed, on the one hand, there is nothing more pleasant to beat chess 5-year-old child, and the other - for it is a science. Let understand that in competition with others, he obviously loses and immediately get used to deceive and cheat by changing the rules of the game for your convenience.

23. When a child is the first time threw a fit do not get distracted and do not distract him - give him what he asks. Repeat many times. He must consolidate this useful skill.

24. Beat the child. Hands, lips, by the pope. Mandatory kicks and cuffs. This will help the child to perceive violence as the norm, and with dignity and patience to endure bullying and beatings in the future from their peers, the police, the army, from the husband or accidental rapist.

25. is rubbed into the trust, and then learn all you needed was to punish. Arrange interrogations and searches. Remember - it is not your friend and will not ever thus. Your mission is to expose and eliminate him as an enemy. The enemy is crafty - he understands everything and makes you evil. He must understand that you can not find a common language. Word-mates: "I tell honestly and I will not punish you", "Why did you do" "Who asked you," "who you persuaded" "you know what you're doing", "how many times have warned you." < br />
26. blackmailed. It regulates and elaborates a meaningless chaos child wants and needs. Word-mates: "If you do not stop, we will go home," "if you do not get ice cream," "otherwise you will be punished».

27. Say that you love the child and ask the love of it. After all, this is love: the humiliation, lies, punishment, coercion. Do not worry that your deception is discovered. The child grows up and is easy to replace and not thinking, they found no pleasure in relationships with people, the euphoria from alcohol, drugs or gambling. Some fill this void by faith, but if you need not so radical option?

28. is forced child. Compelled in all things. Make out a pleasant chore. Eating, reading, learning new walks - all should be working, and any work - hell. It's simple: wait when the child is doing something himself, and then criticize and chop. Suppose instead, do what you think, it is now important, and you need to correct. Great result - this is when the child does not have time for himself and he stopped what he wants to distinguish himself, but what you want.

29. For the good of your child eradicate empathy and compassion. He must learn to endure pain when pinch your finger, do not cry when razderet to meat knee. Let develops patience and an understanding that no one is sorry and regret will not. At the same time, protect the child from unseen dangers. Scary bacteria unwashed berries from the garden, sneezer baby in the sandbox - this is his main enemies.

30. Talk about bad child. Without it, and especially in it. When others ask him unpleasant and humiliating questions, recalls the "funny" stories from his life. Flaunting his mistakes, shortcomings and mistakes - so he will get rid of them, and you get an alibi. After all, you do not have to do with them.

31. Do not praise your child. Otherwise, he can learn how to evaluate himself. Do not approve of - he will learn to feel good about yourself. Why, then, do you?

32. Monitor the child was in constant anxiety, and physical exertion. Prolonged muscle tension ever, but will result in high-quality chronic disease of the internal organs, back, or cardiovascular system. And you with your child will have additional connecting you common interests.

33. Distract the child from painful experiences. Except, of course, when you are immersed it in them for educational purposes. If a child is sad - it makes rejoice. Learn to enjoy and when he was scared. Let him love in response to contempt, and angry when he is trusted. Gradually replacing it with your emotion. Let her learn to ignore. How else are you going to manage it? And what can be fun, if you are not happy? Word-mates: "stop roaring", "what kind of tenderness", "do not be a coward," "stop me angry", "do not hurt," "you never know what you want", "you're still not tired" "it does not hurt," "laughing at the horse", "eat - it's delicious," "not hot, normal water».

34. is deprived of choice. "Is it normal person would do this, listen to, read, want to." To impose their way of thinking. After all, you worked so hard to have to convince ourselves that "it is correct." Let enjoys ready and hard-won result. Firmly decide that your child needs to achieve what could not reach you, and in any case do not do what you did wrong.

35. To enhance the effect produced by your words, use intonation: condescending impaired meaningful, sarcastic, didactically, declaring a-affirmative, the deceiver, threatening. The child gradually get used and will cease to search for meaning in words and will be fully focused on the emotions of others. This will allow him to perceive conflict-free guidance of the authorities and with the maximum comfort to watch the news on TV.

36. on the child to vent their grievances and bad mood. It is convenient and safe. In addition, when parents feel better, and he recovered his good humor, then the child will be happier.

37. Be impatient. The child must be able to respond to your comments to change right now. Do not be indulgent - even in the imagination, but the child has to do it. Reality then pull up. Or pull up. Never mind. The most important thing to seem someone be - not necessarily. You know that's for sure, though, and he will understand.

38. How can often scare the future. Any unintentional its action in this 30 years later would lead to the collapse of his life. "The Butterfly Effect" is still looked? At the same time, it shows that you are interested in an immediate and measurable results. Word-mates: "How could you lose. it is a failure, "" grow up - become a janitor "," again have to blush for you, "" just fine ».

39. For the argument, always use extreme: katastrofiziruyte, exaggerate, elevated to the absolute, painted in black and white. Confuse cause and effect, the general and the particular, the form and content, is tied to the little things. Manipulate and knocking him off in any occasion. It will teach him to dodge skillfully and smoothly excuses output liars to clean water and sarcastically triumph. At least - on the Internet, it is now just will not disappear.

40. Catch the child to small and unintentional lies - children tend to fantasize. Punished for it. The child must learn to lie more sophisticated. Word-mates, "you're talking nonsense," "your opinion nobody cares", "again you're lying," "do not invent ',' Think of something is better than", "How can you not know", "not Tupi "," think the most intelligent ».

41. Advanced parent knows that absolute obedience is absolutely good for home use only. Teach your child to get rid of feelings of shame, shifting responsibility onto suitable for this, other circumstances and on a case. Let all his troubles will blame those who thinks a lot about yourself - hypocritical, pathetic little people envious. That they provoke a fight. It is they who lie and steal, and he would not hurt a fly - "look so good." When no one hears humiliate other children and their parents. It's true - they deserve it.

42. Admire the child for what he wanted to do, but never did. After all, good intentions better than a bad deed.

43. As soon as possible Bind child to his role. Boys do not cry, do not take offense, they do not fear. Girls neat, watching their behavior and modest. Let the boy soon learns to hide his feelings, and when they accumulate - to pluck them to others. Let the girl beforehand grind skill to find clever ways to get her.

44. The child should be involved in the conflicts between father and mother. Excessive naivety in family matters will then disturb him. Therefore, a 5-year-old should know that if he did not, you would have long been divorced. Overtighten it on its side. And he should know all the details. Including that it would might not be because the mother "wanted to have an abortion, but then it dissuaded».

45. If possible, expand the child the truth.

via psychology.d3.ru/kak-vyrastit-nevrotika-50-effektivnykh-shagov-792535/


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