Istoiya one injury

Events preceding the main narrative ran to me quite disgracefully, but because I dwell on them will not. Arriving home, in addition to all other troubles, I found that my mouth is not completely closed. When you try to close the jaw there is a sharp pain in the left cheek. "Dislocation" - inaudible I told my incisors. "It is clear", - confirmed the left part of the face of acute pain. When you try to eat a bowl of soup was a clear need to rush to the emergency room or go to the baby food and teaspoons. The latter does not appeal to me, and I went to an injury.
 It should be noted that the majority of citizens is very irresponsible and careless, but because in the injury was a lot of people. If a person has come without crutches, then sit down for him was simply unrealistic. As a result, about half an hour I stood in front of the window and contemplated the sleeping cat. Plus, among other things, helped to some dude to do English. You had to hear me utter the article «the».
 Finally he broke into the doctor's office, I was very surprised: you ever seen the Zaporozhye Cossacks, a surgeon? Chub was characteristic distortion and some letters in the speech, and even like, bacon and onion smell. A crutch on the hanger could easily act as checkers, on special occasions, of course. Quickly became my complaints and details of the incident (I said I fell down the stairs), the Cossacks began to talk about the shortcomings of the capitalist medicine compared to the socialist, saying she whore imperialism and all gorilka went bad. He spoke this about fifteen minutes. I honestly pretend that I do not sleep. And then the doctor with a sly squint and a sly smile asked: "Well, putting a ladder gave something?". The type of such a kind and vseponimayuschego Dr. Dr. Dolittle mows. And I'm at it looked like an idiot and said that I did not hit so much to fight with ladders. I think he was offended, and even a crutch like a predatory look. In short, he sent me ... to the maxillofacial surgeon diagnosed with a broken jaw.
 Well, naturally, I shiver in the metro, mouth open, jaw lower ahead is given. Already people are beginning to mown, but then turns away, if I just look at this curious citizen. Obviously, I look bad ... Well, somehow reached the desired station, found the hospital and, accordingly, the surgeon. I sit, waiting for him at the reception for some reason, bath set, and so healthy. Who are they washed, in full view of the entire hospital? .. The surgeon, too, was clean-shaven, but without the forelock. And still very dark, maybe a hangover. Very dark, he listened to me, and, no less grim, sent to the X-ray. Next whole saga: I like a madman, running all over the hospital in search of the free nurses, then we are already with it running for a radiologist, then one nurse ran for the key from the office, came back and said that it is not found, then the radiologist, silly smile, pulled the key from the pocket of his robe. You should have seen the face of a nurse ... In the X-ray revealed that I have an overbite, but no fracture, as well as the dislocation. The doctor advised me to zamatyvat overnight jaw elastic bandage, but his eyes could read the desire to roll up the elastic bandage around my neck and go look for a little bit of alcohol on the health of the amendment. All the way back, I valiantly tried to close his mouth and finally closed. House revealed that the mouth is no longer open. Spitting at all, I went to bed.
 The next morning I got a call from the hospital and was told that I have a fracture. While serious. When asked how they could not help noticing a serious fracture of the right, they refused to answer, and asked to come to them. At this time, another doctor was apparently first still pulled somewhere alcohol. Today the doctor all breathed optimism and said that I needed to go to them in the hospital. On mesyatsok or more. I'm optimistic it somehow did not share. "We have a special frame you will put on the head and jaw, you will not be able to move at all, because it will heal very quickly", - the doctor was saying cheerfully. "And how am I going?" - I thought. "When maxillofacial trauma food enemas" - told me a monotone voice of unknown origin. The doctor it does not seem to hear. "You come to us tomorrow, with the little things, and we will arrange the best way ...", - the doctor told me goodbye.
 Of course I have tomorrow or the day after any public hospitals did not show up and did not regret it. General medicine questionable science. Instead of the frame, I head for the night are wrapped with a bandage, and it went in 2 weeks. And no enemas.