When I got home, I dreamed of buying my own house, but the kids weren’t happy with my plans. Bashny.Net

How exciting and pleasant motherhood? First of all, victories. Small and big. When her children learn something small but important, it's small victories. When they find a good job, start their families, have children themselves - these are big victories. It’s natural for parents to feel pride when their children are on the right path.



Another question is, what contribution should a mother make to the lives of her children? For example, childhood and youth, of course, fall on the shoulders of parents. And then, who needs to help next? Parents are obligated to help their children get back on their feet even though they already feel more and more tired day by day. Or should children devote all their energies to helping their parents, even if they lose precious time in order to find themselves in this life?

I believe that the main task of parents is to put their children on their feet. No more, no less. This includes providing them with a decent education, upbringing, the absence of any moral injuries and everything else. But the point remains the same: children must become normal people and decent members of society.

When I became a widow, Vova and Lisa were just over 15 years old. The very age when hormones crawl out and the character of the child is too far from ideal. I am a grown woman and I know when a mother should be able to shout and when to praise. But to strengthen this image, you always need a father. Without him, there is no team, so the children feel weak and push even harder.



Without my beloved husband it was very difficult in all respects: moral, physical, material. My son and daughter were suffering too, but they were spilling the negativity on me. I tried to sew our family together again, and I must say, I finally succeeded. I am grateful to my children for understanding and for being able to grow up in time without fixating on their ego.

When they left to study, it became even easier. Of course, we continued to communicate at a distance, constantly calling. Again, no one canceled vacations and I was always happy to see their smart, grown-up faces. But I've learned for myself that peace and quiet is the key to a great relationship with everyone, including my own children.

Lisonka got married in her third year. She had a relationship with an undergrad. And then, when he graduated and found a very good job, he immediately made his daughter proposals. She agreed, and I did not contradict the happiness of the young. We talked a little bit with her boyfriend, and he seemed to me a very reliable and decent guy. How could I say anything against it?



Then his son, Vova, married. The parents of my deceased husband immediately said they would help him with housing. They believed that it was their moral duty, because their own son did not get such a gesture from them, times were different. So Vladimir was also lucky: he brought his young wife to an apartment with a beautiful layout and in a good area.

Looking at how well my offspring are doing, I thought a little bit. What do I do now? After all, in my 50s, I also want some changes. I was no longer interested in men, but sitting within four walls was not an option. So we need to change the situation. Go somewhere, find out how people live in other countries. Maybe even make some money.

Said, done. I spent six months on a tutor and, having learned the language, went to one of the warm European countries. Closer to the sea and away from problems. At the same time, I rented my own apartment, and I always knew how to save money. The main thing is to get emotions. Food and rags didn’t matter to me. I fell in love with life for the second time.



To be honest, at first I perceived my trip as a kind of scam: just rest and a small part-time job. But it was actually more interesting. I spent two weeks working as an extra on the beach. We lived in tents, fed and watered. Filming took place in the morning, and in the afternoon and evening you could swim, sunbathe and do whatever you wanted.

Then I became an assistant saleswoman in the store, which was located at the pier. We sold all sorts of nonsense to tourists, but even for a penny product there were so many buyers that I felt like a real professional: how do you like a cash register of several thousand euros for 4 part-time hours? It’s not McDonald’s when everything is in a hurry. We could bargain, make eyes, make jokes. Who cares? People were in no hurry!



But for the longest time, 5 years, I worked as a waitress. It was one antique, themed cafe that often hosted parties for those in their 50s. The staff was about my age, as were the clients themselves. The cuisine is traditional dishes, some recipes are more than two to three hundred years old. But thanks to the quality products they tasted just divine.

When it came time to go home, my plans included selling my apartment and buying at least a small house in the city. I’ve lost track of the small city box. In addition, air conditioners chased me everywhere. I didn't have that luxury at home. It is better to put it in the house than in the apartment – that was my thought.



I've been home for a year. I still remember when I had fun in another country, with other people. I felt good and comfortable, but I came home. I still live in my apartment, and no, I didn't buy air conditioning. The kids gave me a fan, which, however, only sends hot air around the room in the summer. Do you want to know why this happened?

And the reason is simple and trivial. I went home and, of course, invited the families of my son and daughter to celebrate. We went to a small restaurant and everything went well. But then the conversation started. “Mom, we’re going to buy a car here, will you help?”, “Mom, we need to send the youngest to school, and all this expensive, terrible...”, “Mommy, Masik and I would also like to visit where you were there, only we have a little lack...” And that's not even half of what I was asked for that night.

I didn’t want to give up my dream, so I only helped my son and daughter once. And then it turned out that my apartment is not worth much, because the house is already quite old. But what about private property, and even inside the city? “Wow woman, you must have brought millions with you?” was my real estate agent’s first reaction.



So, yes, now all I have to do is remember the past alone. My kids called me for the first few months and then they stopped. I already helped them. I still have money, but it’s slowly slipping out of my hands. The price of the house is higher than where I lived. But the quality of the products is just terrible. But I was happy once, and some people don't know that either. So we should be happy about that. Otherwise, you can get really sad. Who's gonna feel better?