My mom puked for mess as a child, so now I clean very rarely.

Even such a domestic event, in general, as flat It can serve as a trigger that triggers very negative processes inside a person. Depression, depression, self-condemnation. In this article, we will try to find out why this happens.



Interestingly, the issue of cleaning causes many people such experiences. Adults begin to worry, they have anxious thoughts, as if at the moment this is the most important thing to do. Although, admittedly, there is a certain percentage that simply does not care. What's the difference between these people?

Dirty apartment "So, quickly took a broom in his hands and swept the floor", "What kind of pigsty, here in general a person can live?" Oh, my God, but in the dumpster and cleaner!, "And she's still going to a friend. And the house itself is dusty, things are scattered. It's a nightmare. It's not a dialogue between two people, no. These are the inner thoughts of people who see that their homes are not cleaned.



Why is our inner voice so cruel to us? We're kind of one, aren't we? Now it is fashionable to call such abusers - those who cause physical or moral violence to loved ones. But have mercy, it turns out that we make ourselves worse. We pour ourselves dirt. And for what?

First, we must recognize that man is a deeply social being. We are influenced by the people around us. As well as familiar to us, and the first meeting. For example, parents or some rude guy on public transport. The first can cheer us up, and the second can ruin it for the whole day. That's what happened.



Often the intonation of our inner voice coincides with the intonation of the person we currently associate with our interlocutor. That is, for different situations, we have different internal “doubles” of people we know. And the kinder or meaner a particular person is, the softer or stricter will be our inner voice. Let's take a couple of examples.

Parents have shaped our inner voice since childhood. It is not surprising that he often looks like his mother or father. When I was a child, my mother asked me to clean my room or apartment. Someone has a simple request. Some have screaming and wrangling. Here is the second option can very much affect our inner self. “Get rid of what you have! You have more lessons!



Perhaps this attitude was not throughout childhood, but only in moments when parents were especially hard. But a child, especially a small one, absorbs things like a sponge. As they say, it “remains in the subcortex” of our consciousness.

Work is a very important part of most people’s lives. But sometimes it's not just a place where we make a living. It is also a working team that directly affects our mood and well-being. If a person is treated well and respectfully, his mood will be elevated most of the day.



But if he's being bullied by his bosses or colleagues, it's definitely terrible. Attitude to himself will simply be at the lowest level, and, coming home, he will blame himself even for the untidy apartment. After all, the inner voice, his interlocutor is someone from work. Who else?

By the way, this situation can occur much earlier. A large team, an authoritative "authority". It's a school. And if the child is treated badly (and children are very cruel), then his inner world and character will have a negative vector. Anger towards yourself and others. Uncertainty. All this must be understood and warned.

Tender relationships can also be toxic (poisonous, problematic). Maybe not. In any case, the people who have them strongly influence each other morally. It is believed that relationships should support people and bring them closer together. But if your soul mate has a heavy character and a loud voice... Whether you like it or not, it will affect you somehow.



Especially such a routine and household topic as house cleaning. How many times do I have to tell you to go and clean this stinking basement? I'm literally licking this apartment and you can't clean 2 square meters! or Why do I come to my house and my wife is on the phone? Do we have a vacuum cleaner, or do you think it is just for beauty?

Naturally, we give some very negative examples, there is a more positive attitude towards each other. But they are indicative, and you can immediately understand why in some moments our inner voice becomes much tougher. It's as if he's not a part of us, but a stranger, and he's very unpleasant.



And there are plenty of examples. We are affected by a variety of factors. But it's important to try to figure out whether we need such strong self-criticism. Feeling too comfortable can also lead to laziness and doing nothing. But if it does, it will be a real victory. No psychologist can help or understand you better than you. A dirty apartment is not a sentence.