In the '90s, we shared the most delicious things between the kids and the grandmother, because she's like a baby too.

Does being a parent mean agreeing with the child, making concessions, and giving the child the best? Good parents will no doubt give their piece of chocolate to the child and say that they do not want sweets. What is this sacrifice for? Moms and dads try to give their children the best, so they show their love. It is only when children grow up that reality becomes a big disappointment.



Why do mothers feel guilty when they hide from their children to eat chocolate? Sacrifice in us is brought up by parents, and in them this quality was long concreted by their parents. The problem is that when mom and dad try their best to ensure a happy childhood for their child, they distance the child from reality.



I remember my mother bringing me yogurt and licking the lid and telling me how delicious it was. When I was 5 years old, I thought the yogurt on the lid was the tastiest part for a mom. Sometimes I shared yogurt, but my mother refused. And one time I started eating yogurt without a shame, and my mother was surprised that I did not offer her a spoon. Turns out, all this time she's been slying to get all the good stuff to me. What did she want to achieve?



Sometimes parents don’t know how to nurture generosity in children, how to teach them to share, and many other things. And then they remember that the best method of education is your own example. But they don't understand that it's about behavior and what it looks like for a child. At a young age, the child sincerely thinks that the mother does not like chocolate, while she just gives the last piece to her child. Who, apart from the parents, will give the child a hand? Of course, my parents always tried to bring home goodies, often refused cookies, candy to my sister's benefit.



In fact, for a while, I didn't understand why my grandmother would give my little sister a birthday present. So as not to offend. Have you ever seen a co-worker get a company bonus so he doesn't get hurt? It doesn't happen. I don't think my sister and I grew up greedy, no matter what. But I see the same type of education on playgrounds, in transport, in the store. Reality can be harsh, and the task of parents is to teach the child to adapt to the situation, to solve it independently. Sometimes it is necessary to accept, sometimes to take into account other people’s opinions, feelings, thoughts.



Here is another common example of permissiveness: a child gets on the bus with his mother. There's a vacant aisle. The girl sits next to her aunt and says, “I want to sit by the window.” A woman with eyes of five cents in confusion changes with the girl, not even fully understanding why she does it. “It’s children,” the naive favorite phrase probably flashed in my head while the woman was transplanting. What else was she thinking at that moment? She sat by the window when she got on the bus. Did she think the child should say “please” and “thank you”?



That's what I think. This child will never politely ask and thank anyone for the service rendered. He will devalue everything he does for his sake if his parents continue to do so. Worst of all, condescending treatment of children trumps common sense. When a child grows up, he will have to live this difficult life on his own, parents will not always solve all problems, and there will be many people who will not want to share, give in and forgive.



So with the deceptive furry cradle in which these children grew up, they will fall into the abyss of human hypocrisy, indifference, greed and lies. If you want to raise an independent person, polite and kind, then teach the child to do his homework, tie his shoelaces and stand silently in transport, not achieving a cry of free sitting at the window.