Fifty-year-old woman shares why she's glad she never had a baby

Everyone has probably heard of the Childfree movement today. However, it cannot be said that a conscious decision to abandon the birth of children will not surprise anyone. Many people are still interested in the question of how childless women who have reached a respected age live and whether they regret the decision made in their youth. So the editorial board "Site" I decided to share the story of one of the supporters of childfree culture to shed light on this issue.

The other day my husband and I were lucky to celebrate a pearl wedding. We felt that 30 years of living together is a pretty good reason for a magnificent celebration, so we gathered a full house of guests to share our joyful event with friends and family.



At one point, the men at the festive table began to discuss politics and other specific topics, so the girls switched to tea in the living room and started talking about their own. When it came to discussing everyday family issues, everyone remembered the hostess of the house and the reason we were all here.

“Ninochka, you and Grisha have been living alone for 30 years.” Have you ever wanted to get a couple of tomboys? How did you manage to create such a strong and reliable marriage without children? asked friends, their daughters and nieces.



I briefly immersed myself in memories and then told the guests my story. The idea that I didn’t want to have children first came to me at the age of nine when my father and mother divorced. When I left home, my mother explained to me that she was very tired of marriage and motherhood. I remember her saying that she wanted to take care of herself and not someone else.



At that age, I could not understand her as a woman. For me, it was a real betrayal. But when I turned 20, I was finally able to get rid of the resentment and embrace her choices. What’s more, my mother’s words made me wonder if I was willing to devote my entire life to parenting and family care. Obviously, the answer to that question was negative. I wasn’t sure I could bear the burden of so much responsibility.



So when Grisha and I first started dating, I honestly admitted it to him. He said it didn't matter. He added that he would accept any decision I made because he could not imagine his life without me. Perhaps that is why our relationship has become so strong.



I recently asked my husband if he regretted his decision when he was young. And he said that he did not regret a bit, because he was glad to give all his love to me. We are now in our 50s, but we still feel young and free. We have the opportunity to enjoy every moment of our lives without thinking about being selfish.



I am very happy to have met a man like Grisha. I am also very grateful to my mother for helping me understand the kind of life I would like to live.