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Always Say What You Think and 4 More Stupid Life Tips
5 Inappropriate Life Advice
Giving advice to many people is a necessity. They feel like wise men in a world full of inexperience and naivety.
1. “Don’t ever give up on your beliefs!”This is perhaps one of the trickiest tips, because it underlies almost all heroic stories. Who would have known about Giordano Bruno if he had renounced his beliefs in fear of execution? If you have what you believe, you have to defend your truth to the last drop of blood.
All real heroes know that. You want to be a hero, don't you? Well, stand still... unless your beliefs contradict the beliefs of other people you interact with and who love to give advice. Or...
Another option:
“Never stop fighting...but don’t forget to think about whether you’re fighting on the other side.”
Ask the animal advocates at PETA if scientists who conduct animal experiments should fight for their beliefs. Ask the scientists what they think about the persistence of the PETA people. Yes, they are for each other just the embodiment of world evil and trampled morality!
Most “fighters” are not heroes, but rather fanatics. Because they are incapable of compromise, and compromise is what keeps humanity moving forward. And it becomes possible only when a person begins to understand that the opposite side is infected with this “Real heroes never give in!” “Always go to the end, whatever it is!”
So if you’re going to “put your life” in the fight for something, maybe you should also launch a crusade (preferably a lifelong one) to make sure you’re not Hitler in the fight.
2. "Always say what you think!"When I was in fourth grade, we had a teacher who would start yelling at anything, for no reason at all, and would do it all the time. We later learned that she was divorcing her husband at the time and was a bit out of her mind.
Every time she started chastising me in her squealing voice, I, a nine-year-old child, would cry. And I couldn't think of anything better than pretending that my stomach suddenly twisted and I urgently needed to go to the bathroom, where I sat for the rest of class, so as not to return to this nightmare.
When I complained to my mother, she said, “No one will get into your head and know what’s on your mind.” If you think the teacher is yelling at you unfairly, tell her about it in the face.” I listened and next time I blurted out to the teacher that she was scolding me unfairly. Then she realized that you can not take your anger on children, apologized and never did it again.
Joke. Of course, she did not realize anything, only became even more wild - as, they say, I dare to dare a teacher. A few minutes later, I was standing in the director’s office, where I was also trying to present my point of view – this time to people who seemed to have never divorced anyone and had to think sanely. I thought they'd understand me here. Nothing like that. Not even the belly trick.
So I found another wording for myself:
“Speak your opinion, but don’t be surprised if no one wants to listen.”
Growing up involves, among other things, realizing a sad truth: the world doesn’t really care about your opinion. Each child makes this discovery for himself as soon as he first enters into an argument with an adult: You have no experience, you do not know how to make arguments and defend your position. So far, you have mastered only one tactic: repeat the same thing over and over again, louder and louder, and hope that such an obvious truth will somehow find its way to adult consciousness. And when an adult realizes that an argument is useless, he makes the killer argument that he lives longer, so he knows more, and therefore his point of view is important, and yours is not. “You don’t even know what you’re talking about.”
And from now on, you learn to keep your thoughts to yourself. They don’t matter because you haven’t reached the required age or level of education.
Then you graduate from school, and there comes a phase in your life where you think you know and understand absolutely everything. Then you might go to college, and then it becomes obvious to you and your friends that the world would be perfect if humanity listened to what you were trying to convey. And then you have the same phase that you went through the first time you had an argument with an adult. You learn to keep your thoughts to yourself.
You will be deeply disappointed if you wait for the world to listen to you (in fact, it is possible that your opinions are of little value to your friends/coworkers/dogs).
3. “What happened was what happened. Forget the past!
My past is far from perfect. In my youth, I would lounge around, sleep on friends’ couches, and cause a lot of trouble to loved ones who were struggling to pay the bills. My life was like one endless party. When I finally started growing up, I had to apologize to so many people, and there was a reason for that. And more often than not, I'd hear things like, "Well, I'm glad you finally got your head around." What happened, you can't bring back the past. Forget about him. Think of the future”.
In part, of course, they were right. It is very important to forgive yourself the mistakes that were made in the past and start moving forward. Otherwise, guilt can drive you insane. But this does not mean that you should just forget about what you went through and how you got where you were.
I would paraphrase this advice this way:
Remember your mistakes, but don’t let them become an obsession.
People who constantly gnaw at themselves for past sins are just as intolerable as those who never stop thinking about their perfection and exclusivity. In both cases, the person stops noticing other people and focuses solely on themselves.
It's not about forgetting the past. It's about making peace with him.
Being aware of mistakes and their consequences is what can make you better than you are now. If you remember the sad consequences of a wrong decision in the past, think carefully before doing the same stupidity in the future.
But when a person suggests that you “start with a clean slate”, there is a high probability that he is just trying to manipulate you. Like an ex-girlfriend who wants to come back to you: "Let's forget all the grievances." It's tempting because it sounds like forgiveness. But in most cases, the person just wants you to forget about their own jambs. Your ex-girlfriend doesn't need you to remember that there was a good reason for your breakup.
“Let us forget the past. Because thinking about it makes me feel disgusting. Let's get straight to the part that gives me pleasure.
4. In this life you can only trust yourself.
It's very easy to believe. There will always be someone very experienced who will explain how everything works in this world, and that you need to be constantly alert to avoid falling into the traps placed everywhere.
In fact, this passive-aggressive philosophy is typical of people who are very fond of pretending to be victims. They were burned a couple of times and now live with the firm belief that everyone around is just waiting for the opportunity to frame them and sit.
In fact, it’s usually understood as “my life is going wrong and I don’t know how to solve my problems at all.” I absolve myself of all responsibility, because corruption in the state and the imperfection of the world in general make my personal efforts meaningless and useless.”
It may be wise to question other people's motives, as well as to be careful about potential crooks. But building your whole life on the idea that you are the only trustworthy person on the planet is not only foolish, it is dangerous. Not to mention that this is one of the most selfish attitudes possible.
My option:
“Bad people exist. Learn to distinguish them.”
The whole point of communication is to surround yourself with those people who are close to you and distance yourself from those whom you do not want to see next to you.
We are made to live in small groups, and to form these groups requires that we trust at least a select few.
You don’t have to make sure everyone around you is playing the “who’s going to fuck him first” game. It would mean that you are the only morally healthy person on the planet. Add a couple of hallucinations and you can safely diagnose "paranoid schizophrenia".
That doesn’t mean you should wear rose-colored glasses and share your secrets with everyone. There are many people in the world who will not miss the opportunity to use, deceive and frame you. But this does not mean that everyone should be approached with fear, like a rattlesnake.
This advice is good for those looking for an excuse to avoid the complexities that always come up when you’re trying to build relationships with other people. They're not cynics. Just lazy.
5. “Seize the moment! Live every day like your last!
This advice is as idealistic as the call to “love absolutely all people.” If I really knew that today was the last day of my life, the first thing I would do was withdraw all the money from my account and spend it on something I could never afford because I had to think about what would happen tomorrow. The second thing I would do is find the freak who bullied me in school and make him answer for all my humiliations.
Why not? If there is no tomorrow, there are no consequences and no responsibilities. Tomorrow a comet may fall to Earth, that’s all. So why not live as if it really happened? Can you imagine a world where teenagers who have hormones in their blood come up and offer sex? Why? If there is only today, then there is no time for acquaintance and courtship. So the only way out is to just come up and ask until someone says yes. Hate your job? Well, forget about it - go and finally give the boss everything that you have there. Why waste time on things that aren’t fun, even if you’re out on the street without them?
Another option:
Fill today with meaning.
It means doing something today so that tomorrow, looking back, you can be proud of yourself. Today, you have a chance to make your life a little easier and more enjoyable. The less you think about tomorrow, the harder it will be for you to realize that the comet never arrived, and you spent money and energy for the sake of a second pleasure.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s great to be happy every day. Of course, you can’t spend your whole life preparing for the future.But there is only one category of people who have every right to live in the present day: children. That’s why someone has to take care of them.
Written by John Cheese, translated by Svetlana Gogol
P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness – together we change the world!
Source: mixstuff.ru/archives/10341
Giving advice to many people is a necessity. They feel like wise men in a world full of inexperience and naivety.
1. “Don’t ever give up on your beliefs!”This is perhaps one of the trickiest tips, because it underlies almost all heroic stories. Who would have known about Giordano Bruno if he had renounced his beliefs in fear of execution? If you have what you believe, you have to defend your truth to the last drop of blood.
All real heroes know that. You want to be a hero, don't you? Well, stand still... unless your beliefs contradict the beliefs of other people you interact with and who love to give advice. Or...
Another option:
“Never stop fighting...but don’t forget to think about whether you’re fighting on the other side.”
Ask the animal advocates at PETA if scientists who conduct animal experiments should fight for their beliefs. Ask the scientists what they think about the persistence of the PETA people. Yes, they are for each other just the embodiment of world evil and trampled morality!
Most “fighters” are not heroes, but rather fanatics. Because they are incapable of compromise, and compromise is what keeps humanity moving forward. And it becomes possible only when a person begins to understand that the opposite side is infected with this “Real heroes never give in!” “Always go to the end, whatever it is!”
So if you’re going to “put your life” in the fight for something, maybe you should also launch a crusade (preferably a lifelong one) to make sure you’re not Hitler in the fight.
2. "Always say what you think!"When I was in fourth grade, we had a teacher who would start yelling at anything, for no reason at all, and would do it all the time. We later learned that she was divorcing her husband at the time and was a bit out of her mind.
Every time she started chastising me in her squealing voice, I, a nine-year-old child, would cry. And I couldn't think of anything better than pretending that my stomach suddenly twisted and I urgently needed to go to the bathroom, where I sat for the rest of class, so as not to return to this nightmare.
When I complained to my mother, she said, “No one will get into your head and know what’s on your mind.” If you think the teacher is yelling at you unfairly, tell her about it in the face.” I listened and next time I blurted out to the teacher that she was scolding me unfairly. Then she realized that you can not take your anger on children, apologized and never did it again.
Joke. Of course, she did not realize anything, only became even more wild - as, they say, I dare to dare a teacher. A few minutes later, I was standing in the director’s office, where I was also trying to present my point of view – this time to people who seemed to have never divorced anyone and had to think sanely. I thought they'd understand me here. Nothing like that. Not even the belly trick.
So I found another wording for myself:
“Speak your opinion, but don’t be surprised if no one wants to listen.”
Growing up involves, among other things, realizing a sad truth: the world doesn’t really care about your opinion. Each child makes this discovery for himself as soon as he first enters into an argument with an adult: You have no experience, you do not know how to make arguments and defend your position. So far, you have mastered only one tactic: repeat the same thing over and over again, louder and louder, and hope that such an obvious truth will somehow find its way to adult consciousness. And when an adult realizes that an argument is useless, he makes the killer argument that he lives longer, so he knows more, and therefore his point of view is important, and yours is not. “You don’t even know what you’re talking about.”
And from now on, you learn to keep your thoughts to yourself. They don’t matter because you haven’t reached the required age or level of education.
Then you graduate from school, and there comes a phase in your life where you think you know and understand absolutely everything. Then you might go to college, and then it becomes obvious to you and your friends that the world would be perfect if humanity listened to what you were trying to convey. And then you have the same phase that you went through the first time you had an argument with an adult. You learn to keep your thoughts to yourself.
You will be deeply disappointed if you wait for the world to listen to you (in fact, it is possible that your opinions are of little value to your friends/coworkers/dogs).
3. “What happened was what happened. Forget the past!
My past is far from perfect. In my youth, I would lounge around, sleep on friends’ couches, and cause a lot of trouble to loved ones who were struggling to pay the bills. My life was like one endless party. When I finally started growing up, I had to apologize to so many people, and there was a reason for that. And more often than not, I'd hear things like, "Well, I'm glad you finally got your head around." What happened, you can't bring back the past. Forget about him. Think of the future”.
In part, of course, they were right. It is very important to forgive yourself the mistakes that were made in the past and start moving forward. Otherwise, guilt can drive you insane. But this does not mean that you should just forget about what you went through and how you got where you were.
I would paraphrase this advice this way:
Remember your mistakes, but don’t let them become an obsession.
People who constantly gnaw at themselves for past sins are just as intolerable as those who never stop thinking about their perfection and exclusivity. In both cases, the person stops noticing other people and focuses solely on themselves.
It's not about forgetting the past. It's about making peace with him.
Being aware of mistakes and their consequences is what can make you better than you are now. If you remember the sad consequences of a wrong decision in the past, think carefully before doing the same stupidity in the future.
But when a person suggests that you “start with a clean slate”, there is a high probability that he is just trying to manipulate you. Like an ex-girlfriend who wants to come back to you: "Let's forget all the grievances." It's tempting because it sounds like forgiveness. But in most cases, the person just wants you to forget about their own jambs. Your ex-girlfriend doesn't need you to remember that there was a good reason for your breakup.
“Let us forget the past. Because thinking about it makes me feel disgusting. Let's get straight to the part that gives me pleasure.
4. In this life you can only trust yourself.
It's very easy to believe. There will always be someone very experienced who will explain how everything works in this world, and that you need to be constantly alert to avoid falling into the traps placed everywhere.
In fact, this passive-aggressive philosophy is typical of people who are very fond of pretending to be victims. They were burned a couple of times and now live with the firm belief that everyone around is just waiting for the opportunity to frame them and sit.
In fact, it’s usually understood as “my life is going wrong and I don’t know how to solve my problems at all.” I absolve myself of all responsibility, because corruption in the state and the imperfection of the world in general make my personal efforts meaningless and useless.”
It may be wise to question other people's motives, as well as to be careful about potential crooks. But building your whole life on the idea that you are the only trustworthy person on the planet is not only foolish, it is dangerous. Not to mention that this is one of the most selfish attitudes possible.
My option:
“Bad people exist. Learn to distinguish them.”
The whole point of communication is to surround yourself with those people who are close to you and distance yourself from those whom you do not want to see next to you.
We are made to live in small groups, and to form these groups requires that we trust at least a select few.
You don’t have to make sure everyone around you is playing the “who’s going to fuck him first” game. It would mean that you are the only morally healthy person on the planet. Add a couple of hallucinations and you can safely diagnose "paranoid schizophrenia".
That doesn’t mean you should wear rose-colored glasses and share your secrets with everyone. There are many people in the world who will not miss the opportunity to use, deceive and frame you. But this does not mean that everyone should be approached with fear, like a rattlesnake.
This advice is good for those looking for an excuse to avoid the complexities that always come up when you’re trying to build relationships with other people. They're not cynics. Just lazy.
5. “Seize the moment! Live every day like your last!
This advice is as idealistic as the call to “love absolutely all people.” If I really knew that today was the last day of my life, the first thing I would do was withdraw all the money from my account and spend it on something I could never afford because I had to think about what would happen tomorrow. The second thing I would do is find the freak who bullied me in school and make him answer for all my humiliations.
Why not? If there is no tomorrow, there are no consequences and no responsibilities. Tomorrow a comet may fall to Earth, that’s all. So why not live as if it really happened? Can you imagine a world where teenagers who have hormones in their blood come up and offer sex? Why? If there is only today, then there is no time for acquaintance and courtship. So the only way out is to just come up and ask until someone says yes. Hate your job? Well, forget about it - go and finally give the boss everything that you have there. Why waste time on things that aren’t fun, even if you’re out on the street without them?
Another option:
Fill today with meaning.
It means doing something today so that tomorrow, looking back, you can be proud of yourself. Today, you have a chance to make your life a little easier and more enjoyable. The less you think about tomorrow, the harder it will be for you to realize that the comet never arrived, and you spent money and energy for the sake of a second pleasure.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s great to be happy every day. Of course, you can’t spend your whole life preparing for the future.But there is only one category of people who have every right to live in the present day: children. That’s why someone has to take care of them.
Written by John Cheese, translated by Svetlana Gogol
P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness – together we change the world!
Source: mixstuff.ru/archives/10341
