Family life —the impact of stereotypes Bashny.Net

The ROLE of TRUST-based REACH to KEEP LUBOVIU the reviews of readers on article "the Philosophy of women's health before and after birth" (read here) have thought about the fact that women's individuality outside the family looks as if women came to Earth from Venus, and the arrival of men from Mars is delayed.





Entering into a marital Union, the life cycle of the family is seen as it is fixed in our minds constantly repeated stereotypes about true love.

Colleague married, son Andrey and invited us to the wedding. We has long been well known not only Andrew, but his bride Lily. Members of the wedding long before the wedding admitted that Andrew and Lily were the perfect couple.

The responses of the bride and groom, in the spoken toast and farewell, there were words strong conviction that their life together nothing unexpected can happen. However, only a year they were on the verge of divorce.

Both claimed that nothing significant for a year did not happen. Only now, however, they often quarrel broke out, as they acknowledged mainly because of the detail. The initiator of the clashes was Andrew, which, although claimed to love Lily, but then, apologizing, saying that to live with her under one roof is becoming day by day more difficult. Lily, on the other hand, believed that Andrew after the wedding is annoying and the theme of his home conversations are reduced only to criticize the behavior not only Lily but also her appearance.

Throughout the year the life cycle of the family, which consists of Andrew and Lily, looked very well. But, unfortunately, it turned out that the couple disregarded the difference in the habits that each of them brought from home.

Lily's mother, being completely absorbed in his work and career, he paid little attention to creating comfort. The family of Andrew was dominated by the cult of the traditions, maintained the ritual of family dinners and festive gala dinners. All this contributed to the establishment between home feeling particularly trusting intimacy. Naturally, Andrew, in Alliance with Lily rather had an acute shortage of the previous day.

The research of sociologists found that most young couples during the initial three-month life cycle of the families have more or less disappointment in love to each other. These disappointments not every time are serious, as is often dictated by the mismatch of behaviours and Express our feelings. Each of the parties to the marriage have certain views on how relations should develop. The experience obtained in childhood and adolescence, each side serves as a guide to development of relations.

This, for example, observations on the life of parents, acquaintances, and strangers settled in the mind as a reservoir of knowledge about the relationship between father and mother, or literary characters. It is in the initial cycle of the family all these views the young couple something like the matrix where they try to cram what they like personally. Scatter them "like" can take the most bizarre aspects of the relationship: from the forms of manifestation of feelings of love or intolerance to rejection of the views of the other side about how to spend free time.

WELL-CHOSEN SPOUSE IS A SUCCESS FOR THE PRESERVATION OF LOVE

The researchers came to a very disappointing conclusion that in our consciousness, under the influence of the media, asserted the opinion that any sort of family life in some way unhappy. If the pessimists argue that the family life is the funeral of love, the optimists believe that the hardest thing to live in marriage, the first twenty-five years, and then all of nothing.





Although the words positive and negative answers revealed a polarity of opinions, but the very essence of the life cycles of the family built up in our minds inseparably with those prejudices and stereotypes that prevail in public opinion. Only the prejudices and stereotypes that influence our own behavior, do not allow us sometimes to understand the behavior of the partner in the marriage.

Here, for example, a fairly common stereotype that a marriage is something resembling a lottery. Each of the parties entering into a marriage, as if buying a ticket is aiming to win. But the characters of marriage rely on fate, which one will give the win as the partner that would complement the dignity of winners. Another partner the same fate will prepare the punishment in the form of constant misunderstandings and scandals.

Every aspect of marriage, parents try to protect them from error and warn that you should carefully choose the person who will hand over their own lives. Most of us forget about it. Taking the decision to marry, we are still elementary. For each of us success in all life cycles of family life is seen as an equation with many unknowns, which determines successful or not quite picked up this pair.

In another, very widespread in our society the stereotype, it is argued that women must sacrifice themselves for the sake of the family. Most often this stereotype is found among couples with little age difference, which is similar not only professional interests but also equal chances of success in career growth and development.

Usually, in such situations, the woman gives in and gives her husband the opportunity to achieve career heights in the hierarchy of the firm's management. However, many women, imbibed the spirit of emancipation, strongly disagree to accept such a position. They believe that in such situations, a young mating pair should be provided not only support each other on the steps of the career ladder, but also to equally divide the household chores.

Despite the long evolutionary process in the development of family relationships, many of us cannot overcome in his mind this opinion, that the spouses after marriage become a sort of private ownership of each other. Husband is convinced that he has the right to decide and regulate the life of his wife. According to his firm belief, only he who decides what it should do. And even not negotiable, the problem is not to consider his consent, with whom she is allowed to meet and what she should be interested in. But the wife believes that all proposed and existing business husband is obliged to negotiate always with her. In addition to everything else, if its interests do not coincide with its interests, the husband just has to give them up. And yet this most absurd condition, to squeeze wives in the life cycle of the family is that all the free time men spent only with family.

In addition to these stereotypes, sometimes you run into the consciousness of the spouses so-called bridging factor. This, when unsuccessful, with the ongoing quarrels and misunderstanding, married life trying to correct the child. The seriousness of this view is very questionable, since it leads to the fact that instead of the two accidents, there is still the third.

LOVE IS a GUARANTEE of FULL SECURITY Supratentorially the cycle of the family to its three-month deadline after the wedding, the newlyweds usually encourages the understanding of the fact that their idea of married life was mainly influenced by the opinions of others. And it forces them all the time in the relationship to make substantial amendments. When the desire to be together overcomes the difficulties, the couples all the more convinced of the opinion that, to preserve not only marriage, but of love, they need to establish as soon as possible understanding.

But to achieve mutual understanding, each party needs their needs to formulate and Express them so that they are understood by the spouse. But unfortunately, there could be a very significant moment of danger, when placed on the needs can be not only rejected, but ridiculed and unfriendly tone. In this situation simply has to be a guarantee of full security.

No less important for success in establishing mutual understanding, to be willing to accept a loved one as a personality whose traits are so unnatural and unusual, that seem not only strange, but also exhausting. If there was love and want to keep it, then a loved one should take this for what it is.

Love, as a concept, – its naturalness is ambiguous. For example, the desire to obtain ownership of the object of their feelings, or the romantic dream of achieving "unity" as a similar case and the desire to make a loved one happy, — all this is called love. However, the harmonic coexistence of two requires something more than a mutual passion.

In conclusion: in General the power of the senses to the chosen one is obliged to be supported by a Mature and thoughtful attitude to the marriage as fact the triumph of love over prejudice and stereotypes. Only in this situation a relationship based on love, will bring the life cycle of the family in the rhythm of the steady state.

 

Source: dolgo-zivi.ru