Two stories

I work in the office computer. Once familiar Policeman came and asked to fix his home computer - the Windows swap, etc. And it so happened that he was taking it, I was not there. A few days later a meal with a friend on his car (Toyota Celica, not the car of course, but quite agile machine), getting ahead of the stream in a staggered manner. My favorite me about this methodically saws. And as the apotheosis (do not know how to spell) overtake two consecutive bus at the railway crossing, and here they are birthmarks friendly waving striped stick. Curled to the side, slightly open a window, pull out the documents. My thus already shines zloradstvenno like "I told you ...". And here comes in the happy face of the very Policeman and holds out his hand and said, "Hello OG! Skok do I owe you? "My first thought - with a friend right now glazik fall out and rolled under the seat

Blonde and brain cancer
 Went as once, I at McDonald's. The young man took my order, I stand, then wait until I bake gamberger, not too many people. - Free cash - screaming man and woman passing by sharply povarachivaetsya and goes to the checkout. And I become an unwitting witness to this heartbreaking, and shall communicate to the brain cancer dialogue: - Young man, I can not get to the toilet, there is closed! - Now, for one second, it is necessary to enter the code, - he says, and knocks on the cash register receipt - that's down here, - lifting the lower part of the check, - code (who does not know at McDonald's on the toilets combination locks) it is necessary to enter fully * * 5555 - he says - always with an asterisk! The girl in this time gets a cell phone, looking at him with big blue eyes and says the phrase, after which I personally began to sob with laughter: - You mean the SMS-ku have to send ?? - Do not ... - Call ??? - The guy standing on the other side of the cash register's eyes filled with tears, I strained all the muscles not to neigh like a horse thought - Yes, send an SMS to the number * 5555 * and receive an access code to tuletu McDonald's. - And neigh (otherwise it will not name). - And you where it is necessary - sprsil guy- the toilet ??? - I could not resist and fell with wild laughter at the cash register. She constantly for 10 seconds stared at the check code and then povenulas and headed toward the exit. Morality. I now know exactly what 90% of jokes about blondes real stories!