7 ways to talk with your child so that he understood the first time Bashny.Net

Should have told the son: "Before bed, put away toys," and he began every evening regularly stack them in a box? Yes, it's a miracle! Often it is not so: we have a lot of time to say the same thing in every way. There are several reasons why children do not understand us and seven ways to talk so they listened to us.

The reasons of misunderstanding Children consider themselves immortal creatures (which is good), and no child, I can not believe that it can happen to you. Here is the touch of levity or indifference, which we so often encounter, especially when talking with Teens. Children generally arranged differently than adults. And because of this "otherness" they do not often understand us. Or understand, but not so, and see not what we had in mind. I used to tell my daughter or son: "Clean up your room", child working, clean like trying, and as a result you find the same rubbish, just rearranged in a different order. From your point of view, it is a disgrace. With children — total order, because valuable (beautiful!) and necessary things it is foolish to stick to hell. The same thing happens when we are about to be warned or something, or something trying to get kids. Children's thinking is concrete and practical. To high abstract truths, it grows to the middle, and more often by the senior class. Because generalities, as a rule, do not touch them. And notation and the edification of the General cause yawning. Speaking of poddakivanie. Parents it's annoying: baby nods head, agrees, like she understood, and then it turns out that I don't understand any-thing. But you should not be offended. I think that smart kids assent to us from the humane considerations, parents try — and I do not want to disappoint them. What should I do? Speak their language and they understand what you want them to warn. Explain clearly and vividly To the child how to remember anything, not enough for him to hear. It needs: — to see; to feel; to perceive through the senses and emotionally (by the way, our subconscious mind works the same way for his native language images and feelings). So, you want, that the child understood, really understood, create the image and engage his senses. Way more useful than a long speech, and words, not only for young children but also for grown-up. He directly goes to the subconscious, and put there — it will never go away. Play the Game — the best way to convey to the child the necessary information. And so that they are firmly entrenched in his memory and at the right time "emerged" there. While the child is small, all "safety lessons" should take place so unobtrusively, in the form of a game. However, the older children learn important concepts better if unobtrusive, "playfully" to explain them. Why? Because playing for children is as natural as walking and breathing. When I play, any advice perceived quite differently, without an internal protest, because they are always way, because you are equal, you're partners, you partners and friends. Tell tales One of the best ways to convey something to the child — to tell stories where, in such situations get the cute characters, which the child may be unconsciously he relates. Lessons in between to Remember the hated subject before the exam, and how quickly and safely you have forgotten it, as soon as passed. Here is the same. That tired and under duress, is digested with difficulty. Blame the same internal protest! Safety lessons are also the best: — unobtrusive; — causing curiosity and desire to learn; — interestingly — the more will be your lessons, the more assurance that the child will learn them perfectly. The main principle of teaching is to teach so that the child wanted to learn. Put the baby and read him a lecture is possible. You can't make him listen to it for an hour. If you start to speak, speak, speak, and see that the eyes he lifted to the ceiling, a hand propped his head, head cocked to the side, lip-synching, leg pulls or draws something, you can be sure, he is no longer in this room, not with you.

Lectures can be read if you are: — a good speaker and have the gift of persuasion; feel unabated interest of the child. Lecture even adults absorbed and stored in the long memory of five percent. So speak clearly, concisely and vividly. Show me how to do it correctly If you want to give the baby to grow and develop, you will have to learn to resist public opinion. Stencils, habits, rules long ago, the view of any passers-by who just have to deal with. It is easier to accept screaming out of the gate, but better is to think with your head. But think will either beforehand or about the consequences. By the way, and the child too will not prevent to learn to think first and then do (climb, jump, run, gallop...). Artful "no" treachery "no" many parents already know. With "no" and "don't..." the situation is even worse. I do not want our subconscious to take it. Any ban our mind meets with hostility. And to listen and listen (and especially to learn), you have to make an effort to get over his own "we won't." Remember as you are angry at the restrictions in the family or at work. And the children of such an effort to make even more difficult (at least, because they — the people of freedom). And, well, we say "No! You can not!" and the child to hear we are not ready, he "bananas in ears". We say "don't do" and he hears "do it quickly...". With rhetorical questions occurs somehow the same: children, and even your subconscious, they are rather annoying because they are not required to answer. Especially angry Teens, when out of your question looks something snide and restraining type "I'll Russian language you speak: how long...?!". What follows from this? 1. Try to construct sentences to do without "not", "no" and "impossible."

2. Avoid rhetorical questions (especially when you have a bad mood) .

3. Be careful-considerate with a slightly ironic hint, it often looks like a sort of sophisticated version podkalyvaniya and, too angry, especially teenagers (and so they don't feel confident).

4. But if you still have to say "no" to sweeten the pill.

5. So your speech should be positive and specific, good, but not ironic.

6. Repeat in different ways .

7. Any new information enters short-term memory. There it is stored in about three days, and then either erased, or goes into long-term memory, i.e. to remember.

Information goes into long-term memory: — when it is bright, emotional; — when the person repeats it back to her. He as if tells the brain: I can use this is important, remember!

Ideally, it should be so: he mastered the new material, and then to repeat: in three days, a week in a month. And the repetition should take place in different ways: so interesting and memorable! About the same — in different ways. Consistently, gradually deepening and returning to the past, to speak about the simple and more complex things. The child grows, but the rules don't change. They just complemented and expanded, there will be new items with new twists, but the essence is the same.published

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

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Source: www.psychology-age.ru/2015/12/7_17.html