What to do if a child is greedy

A quarrel between brothers and sisters always upset parents. Parents want that children grew friendly, cared about each other, shared. However, we adults often forget that children's behavior is the result of our attitude to children.





Especially parents are worried when children fight and be greedy.

Four-year-old Leroy takes a toy from his younger sister. Is a small sachet to take the doll, Valerie snatches it from the hands of Sasha. If Sasha finds in the street a beautiful piece of glass or stone, Lera immediately takes it.

And Sasha starts to cry loudly. When the sisters come to the Playground, some sensitive mother immediately leave and take their children. Some moms actively use the image of Lera for the education of their children.

Hear from all sides: "How embarrassing to hurt the younger, Never do the same as Leroy", "See what a naughty girl". Marina, the mother of Valeria and Sasha is very shy about such behavior of his daughter and always tries to settle the conflict by any means.

It also scolds the eldest daughter, shouting, forcing her to return the toy the youngest and then trying to reassure the younger. But it does not work and then she slaps Leroux, punishing her, and unhappily lagging home with two crying daughters under the judgmental looks of other moms.

Marina feels miserable, bad mother and very angry at Leroux. At home, she puts Leroux down in the corner, but nothing changes. Although there is no change. Gradually, the behavior Lera is getting worse, she begins biting his nails.

The saddest thing about this story is that Marina was a bit shy behavior Lera and therefore often scolds her publicly. This girl seems to don't love her, because other kids on the street mom scolded much less. If there is a need to reprimand, then it must be done alone.

The presence of other people diminishes of the child, reduces his self-esteem. An adult abusing a child, does not cease to love him. But a child's thinking differs from adult thinking. Baby it seems that if mom swears, she already doesn't like him.

The house Lera is in a corner and feels very unhappy, unloved, because at this time the mother is busy with little Sasha. Valerie is mad at Sasha, and when it is released from the corner, she immediately shows his anger, begins to take away toys Sasha and even beat her. It turns out that the punishment not only had no effect, but it turned out harmful.





Is there a way out of this vicious circle?

Tanya has two sons and her story began the same way. Senior, max, constantly offended Jr., Denis. Tatiana honestly tried to be fair, she always carefully understand the situation and gave the toy to the one who took her first. Patiently explained to Maxim that if Dennis took the first a toy, then you cannot take away. Soothed a crying Dennis. But her actions did not bring any result. Then Sergey, Tatiana's husband, began to buy toys in duplicate. So the children were not hurt. And again, nothing has changed. Only Denis also learned to select toys.

Tatiana realized that something needs to change. She stopped to focus on the negative actions of their sons. She stopped to scold them for what they take toys from each other. She began to teach them to be friends and began to show everyone that he is good and kind brother. She just began to redirect their actions in a positive direction.

Marina ceased to be a fair judge, she was just mom. A mom who loves her sons. When max took something from Dennis, she was in no hurry to make things right.

She just asked Maxim to give Denis some kind of toy, distracted, Denis said: "Look what you Maxim wonderful toy given, how he's a caring brother." Of course, these words she said not so much for Dennis, as for the Maxim. Just as was the case when little Denis was selected toys. Mom looked at games sons and noticed that quarrels arise when children get tired from each other.

So she began to follow closely and when they saw that they begin to interfere, tried to shift their focus to themselves. The three of them sat down to read books, danced, sang, played games. Sometimes the reason was that Denis too was actively involved in games of Maxim, for example, demolished buildings. Tatiana became in these moments to distract Dennis with interesting games, giving the opportunity to his advantage to play one.

Gradually, the children have less to fight, less to take away toys from each other.

Of course, a quarrel between them did not stop, but is there friendship without quarrels?

Repeating that the child of a brother or sister, caring, kind, affectionate, etc. You will achieve greater results than if you call him greedy etc don't forget the saying "what you would call a boat so it will sail", the Child is like a sponge the words of adults, without critical reflection takes on faith the words that are said about him.

If the child hears from adults, that he is a mean spirited, greedy, stubborn, a bad boy brawler, he will and mean spirited, and greedy. But if the child hears from parents about themselves is good, it will get better. published

 

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P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

Source: vk.com/roditeli_i?w=wall-5608057_1278880