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11 golden rules for dialogue with difficult people
possibility of an agreement is always there. Even when it seems that the point of view of the parties are very different, their interests are incompatible and compromise will not happen.
Website published an article by Svetlana Roiz family therapist about the 11 rules of the dialogue to help achieve mutual understanding in the family relationships and work matters.
Before any contact must be adjusted as customizable tool before the concert. Take a strong position - sit or stand, so to feel the support and balance. Talk to an adult position - just what sure and that is important to you, keep in mind, for what you have entered into a dialogue. If it is likely that you will provoke emotions - get a point before his eyes, or clothing (or one touch), which will symbolize to you the stability and balance. Since a difficult conversation with a loved one, or say out loud to himself: «I'm starting to talk to in order to stay in contact, to be with you, but not to quarrel» Truth subjective. Look for a dialogue prapravdu, combining original meaning, that is beyond words. It is possible to do only in the quiescent state, drawing from life of tranquility. Everyone has the right to imperfection, error, error - this does not change the original respect for the other party. Remember that you may be wrong, let yourself learn. Respect for our interlocutors and opponents start with us to respect ourselves. Everyone has their own language and character number, its speed of response. What has been said and heard "screened" through our subjective experience and perception and dissipated when translating hear the words on his tongue. Do not be afraid to ask again. Let's take time for yourself and the other party to the "assimilation", and digesting the information. Most say the pronoun "I" instead of "you" ("I feel", "I'm offended," "I am angry" or "I think"). We project our thoughts to the interlocutor , feelings, desires undeveloped, and we therefore projected. Learn to distinguish between the projection and not allow them to influence the intrinsic value. We immediately understand those with whom we live on the same frequency. Speak in plain language, but do not lower your "frequency." Go up to more than the aligned interlocutor and not to stoop to those who are trying to provoke a "drop in." With an active-aggressive people need to learn to just leave the aggressive contact, do not take the charges to your account. These people are hiding behind the generalities and the pronoun "we" are the most vulnerable side. Upon contact with the passive-aggressive people - they prefer to talk behind his back, after throwing words - try to put the emphasis in communicating meaning. Make sure that the feelings were manifested. Do not provoke guilt and giperotvetstvennosti that produce passive-aggressive people. After challenging the contacts need to rest, recharge. Do not roll down to the discussion of personal qualities - only talk about facts and events. Estimated manifests helplessness as the last argument. If dialogue is still turning into quarrels and disputes, it is quite different frequency - include a sense of humor. I'm in such cases, I remember the phrase "Mold reproduce by spores. Do not argue with mold. " Perhaps most importantly, talking to a man to contact his "higher" part. Build dialogue from the "maturity" with his "maturity». This is an appeal to the "highest potential" helps achieve the level of injury is, evaluations, provocations and stereotypical reactions. Mentally, says the source, "I see you", "your thoughts are important to me, and your presence, even if I disagree with you." It is important to complete the dialogue - "thank you", "before meeting» , any words that will sound sincere at this moment, appropriate. Analyze past conversations, try to learn from them. Confident man calmly says that he feels what to expect, thanks for contact and dialogue can take a compliment and say a compliment.
Author: Svetlana Roiz
Preview: Summit Entertainment
via summitentertainmentgroup.com/
