Children grow up quickly)))) Bashny.Net

March 6 Slavik sat in the classroom of the Russian language and pretended to be writing exercise. In fact, his thoughts focused entirely on the other. However, it is not the other, or rather the other hand, thought Slava focused on the teacher. To be more precise - on the gift that each student must present this same teacher the next day.
 The problem was that the idea was concentrated only to the word "gift", and after going through it quickly disperses. What exactly do the teacher as a gift? This stupid question unanswered and tormented Slavik. We could learn a poem and tell Vera Petrovna on morning. That would be the best option, if not a "but" of the poem, and strictly stipulated, told in strictly defined manner strictly stipulated pupils in strictly limited quantities, and is 4 boys and 2 girls, designated the most Vera Petrovna even two weeks before the holiday. Slavik would in any case would not have fallen into this six, even if he were a girl, because, among other things, this would have to study hard. Among other options deserve attention just a few ideas that were at least feasible. Gifting flowers meet this condition, but Slavik, a true mathematician, felt it, a condition that, although it was necessary, but obviously not enough. Therefore, should add to that something else. But what?! One could make a beautiful card within which to draw a smiley Vera Petrovna and sign a "favorite teacher, Vera Petrovna from class 5B student Kozlov S. International Women's Day in March."
 The ability to draw, as well, and other abilities in Slavik was not, however, Slavik not dropped the idea off, leaving her in case of emergency. You can ask my mom to make a cake, judging by the size of Vera Petrovna - she is not averse to enjoy a cup of tea a piece.
 - Interestingly, she anybody ever did cunnilingus?
 Slavik was so deep in thought that even a loss. He looked at the Eureka. Yurik was Losers, and the second day sitting at a desk with Slavik.
 - What? - Asked Slavik.
 - Estimate of the fat bitch to do cunnilingus - quietly, and therefore particularly disgusting giggled Yurik
 Slavik puzzled paused, then whispered:
 - So what?
 - Well, you would be able to make her cunnilingus?
 Slavik pondered:
 - Is it so hard?
 - Well done, if not difficult - trying not to laugh, threw Yurik
 - Well, do - Slavik muttered resentfully.
 - Hahaha, I bet that did not?
 It was too much. It was a challenge.
 - You'll see - do!
 - Calm down and shut up! - Screamed Vera
 Slavik again buried in a notebook. Yurik pushed him to the idea. As soon as cunnilingus hard to do then nobody would do it. Therefore, if he did make Vera Petrovna cunnilingus, he favorably to all others in the same class with their cards, cakes and other banal minutiae. Slavik dimly aware that the complexity to make it exactly Vera Petrovna ultimately comes down to it - a teacher, you can not go wrong here, it is a very responsible and can easily be trapped. Because you need to do not just a cunnilingus, and the best cunnilingus, impeccable and correct. It was really difficult, considering that before Slavik generally never done cunnilingus. Even the palest hue. He even began to doubt whether he entered that bet with Yurik. However, doubts Slavik immediately rejected. It is during that whatever the cost, make Vera Petrovna cunnilingus, what would it at any cost!
 Slavik thought about it all the remaining lessons. Never seen it yet so thoughtful. In general, Slavik was full of confidence that he can do it. The only problem is that to figure out exactly how to do cunnilingus. He decided to ask the Stёpu - the smartest in their class:
 - Stepan, have you ever tried to do cunnilingus?
 - Actually I not tried - Stepan replied hesitantly.
 This uncertainty in his voice alarmed Stepin Slavik. He chided himself for this negligence. For now Stepan, too, can grasp this idea. It is clear that he will not spawn competitors, telling them all the details of how to make cunnilingus. Ask people need uninterested.
 After school Slavik trudged home. He went into his yard. On the bench sat drunken high school students. One of them swore loudly. Slavik Vova recognized him from the second entrance. Vova sometimes ride his bicycle. Now Vova yelling:
 - Oh, she's a bitch, this creature. Yes, I did everything for her, everything took his grandmother at her! Thrown, I kill, rat! That's what I do with it, guys, what am I going to make her a bitch? !!!
 The boys were silent. Vova also stopped and took a sip from his throat.
 Slavik stay there and listening to all this, unexpectedly for himself said:
 - Maybe you do it on March 8 cunnilingus?
 They all stared at a fifth-grader. There was an oppressive silence.
 - Cunnilingus? .. - Crooked looking at Slavik, mumbled finally Vova - cunnilingus? Her?! After all this ?! Yeah ... I told her do cunnilingus - and gaining momentum - I'll make her a bitch cunnilingus! Jig saw, sandpaper and cautery! Such cunnilingus she will do what she will remember for a lifetime!
 Slavik hurriedly went to the entrance. Of course, Vova was clearly not himself, and on it was better not to ask, but, at least, Slavik learned what he needed to do a gift Vera Petrovna.
 House was empty. Hastily snack Slavik reached into the closet. He took out of it and a jigsaw, and cautery, as well as a few pieces of wood, plywood, and a couple of zero nazhdachek line. I drag it all in his room and laid on the table. Then I took both tools for making cunnilingus up and hovered over the table. What to do next he did not know. He did not have a clue how to look this unfortunate cunnilingus. However, there was one hope to find out. Slavik took from a shelf two books - one for burn-in, the other crafts made of wood. Two hours he studied each picture. There were wooden duck, bird houses, all sorts of black patterns on the smooth veneer, there was one boat, in general in the books contain a lot of pictures, but none of them was signed by "Cunnilingus." We Slavik dropped his hands.
 He sat limply on the bed. And at that time I came to the institute's older sister. Slavik resolutely followed her into the kitchen. It is something in my life, certainly, I have made at least one cunnilingus. Yes, certainly more. Is it for nothing that love all the teachers and friends.
 - Nastya, do you know how to do cunnilingus?
 Nastia froze a teapot in his hands and stared at the little brother:
 - Slavik, what do you need it?
 - Tell me. I really, really need - a sacrificial voice pleaded Slavik.
 - I do not think I can help you in this - has tried to jump from topic Nastya.
 But Slavik was even younger than her, and for 8 years, but little has grown beyond his years smartest - move sestritsynyh thoughts became clear to him immediately. Of course, she knew it was visible on her face. Besides, she was visibly nervous. I just do not want to betray the secret of cunnilingus. Older children will never tell the younger they have those or other abilities. It is understandable - they just had to come by, by long practice, numerous trials and errors. They are very jealous of it, so that it is easy to tell the younger, who always gets everything is gotovenkoe. Slavik knew it. And so he said: - Well then, I'll ask someone else ... Vova example. And then I will do cunnilingus everyone. Everyone will come only to me and request that I made it to them cunnilingus!
 Slavik not miscalculated. I hit the nail on the head. Sister considerably worried. She sat on a chair and putting his elbow on the table, put her forehead in his hand: "So:".
 Slavik sat down and waited in silence. He grew excellent strategist. After a few seconds Nastya looked at his brother:

 - Slav, for a start it ... it is not all in a row, that's clear?
 - To be honest I want to make it just one person - immediately assured her Slavik.
 - One? .. - Anastasia paused in indecision. But it was evident that it was her calm down. One - not all, of its superiority, it will not lose. The fact that she was now his Slavik there was not the slightest doubt.
 - Well, - continued Nastya carefully weighing every word - you even know ... uh ... how shall I say ... Well, for example ... let's say ... what is he doing?
 Slavik saw through it all and in the soul of her grinning caution. He replied as vaguely - I told you - I do not know how. And what - he threw a meaningful glance at his sister - what I know.
 - So ... okay ... it is easier ... Just promise me you will not tell anyone?
 I do this a little sister can count in full. He has realized that no such knowledge are scattered.
 - I promise.
 My sister took a deep breath, exhale in the next moment and went into a strange state of cautious ease. - You see, - she said, - there are no uniform rules. Most major mistake of all beginners, they believe that ... hmm ... that the more rubs ... uh ...
 - Wand? - Prompted Slavik
 - Wand? - Asked Nastya - hmm ... yes ... yes ... the wand cunnilingus get better. But it is not. If you want to make a real cunnilingus leave this: God forgive me: stick for later. At the very end:
 - Yeah, - open mouth, listening to her older sister Slavik:
 - First you need to carefully - do not have any sudden movements, spoiled everything - to walk around: you can begin to gently reveal uh ... uh ... crack ...
 - Like this?
 - Well, to reveal the crack, drill a hole, you start to do understand: you can even a finger to help, if you can not.
 - Yeah ... - nodded Slavik.
 - Only it should be done very carefully. And some of this is done as if an ax from a log boat vystrugivayut. With individual logs can and should do, but do something for such a cunnilingus should be killed. Thank remember this important point. It was clearly risky.
 - Well, at least he looks like something at all?
 - Well, I'm telling you. He can look differently, because: uh ... more fantasy - gradually diverged Nastya - it should not be just a collection of some fixed dies, they are just not welcome. This is akin to art. Do not be afraid to experiment. Trust your imagination. You must be very like it.
 - Well, what is most important, then?
 - Most importantly - do it with love. If you follow this rule, minor flaws no one will notice. A large: it is better not to do.
 - Clear.
 - Well, in general ... it all:
 Thank thanked his sister for good advice and went to his room. In general, in general, he caught Slavik basic idea of ​​cunnilingus. Cunnilingus called a kind of work on any subject. As with any free theme, it is free with certain restrictions, and the best result, it does not say, still comes with experience. It was certainly not a pleasant discovery, yet his last words comforted the sisters of love and minor flaws. Nobody, not even Ms. Sohn will not require him cunnilingus aerobatics like no one expects even the best works of this school of literary masterpieces. Even closing the door behind him, he heard a quiet voice sister's clearly addressed itself, "everything is fine, everything is fine, I myself because for the first time at the same age: it's better than if:»
 He closed the door behind him. He came to the table, where they were laid out the tools and material. Slavik took the right hand sandpaper, examined the table, raised his left hand, the small size of the stick, turned it between his fingers and put away. Instead, he took a sheet of plywood medium size, he sat on the floor and began to rub his sandpaper. He tried not to lean too much. Gently and patiently, he cleared out the first one way, then another. Gradually, he removed all the surface of the plywood surface roughness, it became smooth as a mirror. Slavik was satisfied with the work done. On another sheet of plywood he made two cut jigsaw, then again took nazhdachku and strip them from the inside. Then he twice turned nazhdachku and rolled it into a tube. Inside, for elasticity, he placed a small metal rod, shook the upper end nazhdachki tape and began to wipe the instrument receives a hole in the middle of plywood. He looked like a primitive man to make fire. The thing was moving very slowly. He kept as advised sister cleaned sandpaper and tried to tap a finger recess. However, the special effect is not given, and he once again took up the rod, wrapped in sandpaper and patiently continued to twist it in the center of the plywood sheet. Occupation it was extremely tedious. Now he knew what to do cunnilingus - really hard. It is doubly difficult is that he was doing his Vera Petrovna, this thick fool. So much work, and to whom ?! Yurik know what to say. Now Slavik realize this fully. But it was too late to retreat. Late into the night he was busy with his cunnilingus. During this time, he fashioned something like neither a sailboat with a mast in the middle or the layout notebook with the handle sticking in it, understand it was difficult to put into words all the more. But one thing is for sure - get something really nice. The last thing that made Slavik was written stubbornly and persistently derived cautery on the side of the composition "Cunnilingus." Just below the "On the 8th of March." Must "Vera" was no longer any strength, more power still remained, but only for something that would consolidate the authorship. Third place small letters he meticulously brought "Kozlov S.»
 The next morning, March 7, Slavik very carefully wrapped in a paper bag cunnilingus and put it in a backpack. With heart pounding with excitement, he, along with his parents, went to school in the morning performance dedicated to the International Women's Day. The class has a lot of people. Adults and children barely took their seats. Someone was sitting on the windowsill, someone standing along the wall. Several children were squatting. In his royal place at the table, to the left of the board to hoist herself Vera. All subsided and started the celebration. The first six of the program were lucky with poems. Each of them is a long and strained clapping. Even Masha, who stumbled on the third line of the first quatrain. This was followed by a scene over which all but Vera Petrovna, laughing loudly, followed by the first scene was followed by a second over which only laughed Vera. It is time for all sorts of competitions, and finally Finally, the students pulled friendly systems with their gifts to the teacher.
 Each approach said pre-harvested phrase: "Vera, you, you are the best, kind and fair teacher, I want to give you a card, which he did." Postcard shows everyone the class. "Vera, you're not just a teacher, you're a real woman, and my mother as a woman congratulate you here this cake." Cake also demonstrated to the public. Very soon on the table Vera Petrovna, a whole stack of cards and several boxes of cake. Slavik was most recently holding a bundle. He stopped in front of Vera Petrovna. Vera looked at him Testing - loving look that Slava had almost buckled up. He was silent. Everyone waited. "Glory, - he heard in the distance the voice of my mother - well, what do you come." Looking Vera Petrovna becomes stress-testing - loving. Slavik hastily unwrapped the bundle and handed it to Vera Petrovna. - What are you, Kozlov, show everyone that you did - nasty smile Vera.
 Slavik stretched his arms above his head with a gift.
 - Very well, - she said slowly Vera - hmm ... and what is this so, I may say, hack means you can be curious?
 - It is cunnilingus - trembling with emotion said Slavik, and hastened to add - this cunnilingus I have done to you, Vera. Congratulations on March 8.
 Vera Petrovna's expression did not change. There is a children's game. Called "Sea Wave": "Braving the waves, the sea two worries, worries sea three marine figure stand still." The effect was about the same. Everyone froze in those positions in which there were a moment before. First his laughter broke general paralysis Yurik. He caused a chain reaction. The next moment, the class erupted universal thermonuclear cackling. Vera, with the same expression on his face hissed through his teeth: "Get out." Slavik, cunnilingus clutching in his hand, a bullet flew out of the class, rolled down the stairs and ran into the street, round the school and sat in the back yard leaning against the wall. All red with shame, he was crying so hard that not even have the strength that would roar with the sound. From the side it was possible to think that the boy had an attack of epilepsy.
 
 
   
 
 
 
 
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