Accidentally learned from a friend that my father is no more, decided to visit my mother, but she did not let me on the threshold.

How to reconcile with your motherWhat if her principles are more important than your happiness? Is it worth the effort at all? After all, the mother is in any case more adult, wise. Who, if not her, should be the first to reconcile? And if there is no such desire, then it will not appear with time. Because in old age, people only strengthen their views on life. And their character, by the way, does not change for the better.



Personal life, future and prospects are what we think about before we go to bed. Accordingly, we can say that these topics concern us not least. But there comes a time when we have to decide who is responsible for our future: parental will or ourselves. Our reader chose the second option and now wants to share with everyone, telling what it led to.

Despite the fact that she does not understand me, I still love my mother, no matter what. Sometimes it happens that a native person goes to principles and it is difficult to prove something. It happened to me, too. I haven’t spoken to my mom in 12 years. Why, why? She just turned out to be a person who can not go against his upbringing and views on life. Even for my own daughter.



I grew up an only child in the family. And yet it didn't help me. In a small village, life is not sugar. But it is even more difficult, as for me, with too devout parents. I wasn't allowed literally anything. Just pray, work in the field and knit sometimes. My mother taught me this very early, and we sometimes sold knitted things in the market in the city.

As I said, I have never had a choice in my life. Our family was purely patriarchal, that is, the father was the master and decided all the issues. We will eat all week long and pray as much. Don't be afraid. It wasn't some family cult. It's just the way it was. When my father was not at home, my mother commanded me. These were mainly household tasks and nothing more.

And despite this tough family policy, I went to a local school. There was no other way. Education in our region was very strict. The child could not help attending classes, parents were asked for this. I had two friends from whom I learned about the world. You know, girl stories and stuff. Socialization is very important, believe me.



After school, I stayed home with my parents. Of course, there was no question of any university or at least a school. My job was to help my parents. Every year, the tasks I had to do became more difficult. My father, of course, did not force me to do the hard work of men, but I dragged the water in my time - creepy. Although, perhaps, health has improved.

And everything would have gone like this if I had not met Semyon at the age of 19. I'm in love. I don't know how to say it, but it was kind of a heartbeat. I just realized that this is my man and without him I just can’t. There were only two problems: first, Semyon was married. Second, he was 36 years old at the time. I would never say that, though. He looked much younger.



When he came to our house, Mom and Dad didn’t accept him. He said, he shouted, he loved me, and his marriage meant nothing, because it was about divorce. But the parents were relentless. A simple ultimatum: either I leave Semen or I leave with him. No dowry, no blessing, and no hope that their decision will ever change. As you can see, I left. I thought about it for a few days and just didn’t come back from a walk.

I have absolutely no regrets about what I did. I'm a grown woman now, over 30. I have a husband, two children, an apartment in the city. I love my family and she loves me. Had I stayed with my parents, I would now have been one of those gray shadows who live in churches for days, and their heads swell with prayer. This life is not for me.



Recently, I accidentally met my village friend in the store. She told me the sad news that my father gave his soul to God. That's when I decided to visit my mom. I thought at least after my father left, she would forgive me. But no. My mother wouldn't even let me in. She's still ashamed of what I did. I don't know how to make up with my mom.

You know what they say? Work and the absence of bad habits make a person younger, more beautiful. Outdoor work, simple food, wake up early in the morning and go to bed until ten in the evening. Well, it's a myth, a lie. My mother is not much older than Semyon, my husband. But she looks good to him, not to me. And I'm not talking about clothes or missing makeup.



Callous hands, circles under the eyes, teeth... The village life sucked all the juices out of her. All that remains is an evil, hateful shell. Again, I still love my mother and I only want the best for her. But obviously it's not mutual. “I have no daughter,” she said. And unfortunately, I died for her when I was only 19 years old. That's her principles, and I can't do anything about it.