21
When I found out that I was pregnant with the second, I asked my husband’s parents to change apartments, I am already six months old, and the cart is still there.
What? mother Is it different from a mother who has only had one child? That's right. Fatigue and the amount of free time. If a family has an average income or even lower, it becomes very expensive to maintain two children at once. The need is growing, literally, in everything.
Peels need a lot more space. New clothes, mixes, even toys. After all, if a boy was born first, and then a girl appeared - consider that again you will have to beat the thresholds of children's shops. Old things will come in handy, except for a wheelchair. Therefore, before having a second child, you should think carefully about whether the spouses will be able to provide it financially. It's the highest responsibility, after all.
Whatever the love between you and your husband, no matter how many butterflies flutter in your stomach, life is not a fairy tale if there are no sane figures on the payment card. Life and routine kill all romance. This is due to savings and lack of money.
If I knew the truth, I would think ten times before having my first child. Pregnancy takes a huge amount of strength, health and nerves. Not to mention the money. It also affects your personal life. With a huge belly, you can not flirt much even with your own husband. I'm not in the mood for that. But it's okay, 'cause after birth, everything works out, right?
With the birth of the first child, everything, I remember, was so strange. New man. He can't speak or read yet. He can’t even lift his own head. But still, it's a future person. Your little baby. Now, as if by magic, all your instincts begin to work in the mode of protection of this blistering pink-cheeked lump. And that will always be the case. I admit, the responsibility feels enormous.
All quarrels and resentments against the husband go to the second, no, third plan. Relationships do change somehow. The angles are flattening. But the costs are growing, time and effort becomes very little. And you feel like you're not on your plate. Unusual and not very pleasant, I will say so. From the first months of motherhood you need to recover. Seriously. It’s hard to explain, but women will understand.
When Arturchik turned a year and a half, my husband and I barely reached the level of finances when you can no longer tighten your belts. I learned to live as a threesome, with a child and a husband, in a one-room apartment. However, I confess that when there is not enough space, it affects the nervous system. I hear even animals in the zoo can suffer from it. Especially, people. Well, at least my husband is always at work and most quarrels occur only on weekends.
It was during this time that we learned that we were expecting a second child. I don’t know how it happened, but it’s a fact. Again, pregnancy, abdomen, hormones, nerves and everything else, in the second round. It was too early to know the gender. But I was hoping with all my heart that it would be a boy.
What were we supposed to do? The space was sorely short. I'm not talking about money. I was willing to save on myself, even to be malnourished. But it's nothing. The eldest son, for example, where to put to bed, in the bath? Even if my husband didn’t come home from work, the situation became critical. And we both understood that. So we had to do something.
My parents still live in the village and even if they wanted, they could not help our situation. The bank didn't lend money. Unfortunately, we do not have rich friends. You know, family. When you refuse to hang out, all close unmarried comrades evaporate somewhere. Those who have children count every penny.
Who was left behind? Father-in-law. And this is actually a very sad truth. Because I'm in my sixth month and they still can't give us a clear answer. The fact is that my husband’s parents live in a nice area of our city, in a two-room apartment. They are pensioners and it doesn’t matter where they live.
Well, judge for yourself: they do not go to work, sit at home or on a bench in the yard. Sometimes they go to the post office for retirement and to the store. Okay. What does it matter if they live in one or two rooms? Besides, we have a lake nearby and a clearing. Store in walking distance and in general, developed infrastructure. I'll even do the repairs myself. If only they could exchange apartments.
Peels mother of the second child But no. This stubborn couple still doesn't want to move. They both make excuses. Like they have friends living there and flowers planted under the windows, you know? That is, their grandchildren and only son should huddle in a one-room kennel. Do they have flowers? I don't understand that.
Yes, and we also recently learned that a girl should be born. This means that children's belongings can be thrown away. And we must immediately start buying a dress and overalls, tights and shoes. But this pleasure is not cheap. My husband must be tired too. There is simply no other option than with mother-in-law.
How do you influence two old men? How do you make them feel, considering that I am the wife of their only son, which means a bad person, a lazy person and a witch in general? Did anyone have a similar situation in their biography? I would love to read some useful advice. Now I will put my son to bed and I will definitely have twenty minutes for myself. Thank you in advance to all concerned. And who, perhaps, my words frightened, please do not be afraid. Just set your priorities right. And you can do it. I will!
Peels need a lot more space. New clothes, mixes, even toys. After all, if a boy was born first, and then a girl appeared - consider that again you will have to beat the thresholds of children's shops. Old things will come in handy, except for a wheelchair. Therefore, before having a second child, you should think carefully about whether the spouses will be able to provide it financially. It's the highest responsibility, after all.
Whatever the love between you and your husband, no matter how many butterflies flutter in your stomach, life is not a fairy tale if there are no sane figures on the payment card. Life and routine kill all romance. This is due to savings and lack of money.
If I knew the truth, I would think ten times before having my first child. Pregnancy takes a huge amount of strength, health and nerves. Not to mention the money. It also affects your personal life. With a huge belly, you can not flirt much even with your own husband. I'm not in the mood for that. But it's okay, 'cause after birth, everything works out, right?
With the birth of the first child, everything, I remember, was so strange. New man. He can't speak or read yet. He can’t even lift his own head. But still, it's a future person. Your little baby. Now, as if by magic, all your instincts begin to work in the mode of protection of this blistering pink-cheeked lump. And that will always be the case. I admit, the responsibility feels enormous.
All quarrels and resentments against the husband go to the second, no, third plan. Relationships do change somehow. The angles are flattening. But the costs are growing, time and effort becomes very little. And you feel like you're not on your plate. Unusual and not very pleasant, I will say so. From the first months of motherhood you need to recover. Seriously. It’s hard to explain, but women will understand.
When Arturchik turned a year and a half, my husband and I barely reached the level of finances when you can no longer tighten your belts. I learned to live as a threesome, with a child and a husband, in a one-room apartment. However, I confess that when there is not enough space, it affects the nervous system. I hear even animals in the zoo can suffer from it. Especially, people. Well, at least my husband is always at work and most quarrels occur only on weekends.
It was during this time that we learned that we were expecting a second child. I don’t know how it happened, but it’s a fact. Again, pregnancy, abdomen, hormones, nerves and everything else, in the second round. It was too early to know the gender. But I was hoping with all my heart that it would be a boy.
What were we supposed to do? The space was sorely short. I'm not talking about money. I was willing to save on myself, even to be malnourished. But it's nothing. The eldest son, for example, where to put to bed, in the bath? Even if my husband didn’t come home from work, the situation became critical. And we both understood that. So we had to do something.
My parents still live in the village and even if they wanted, they could not help our situation. The bank didn't lend money. Unfortunately, we do not have rich friends. You know, family. When you refuse to hang out, all close unmarried comrades evaporate somewhere. Those who have children count every penny.
Who was left behind? Father-in-law. And this is actually a very sad truth. Because I'm in my sixth month and they still can't give us a clear answer. The fact is that my husband’s parents live in a nice area of our city, in a two-room apartment. They are pensioners and it doesn’t matter where they live.
Well, judge for yourself: they do not go to work, sit at home or on a bench in the yard. Sometimes they go to the post office for retirement and to the store. Okay. What does it matter if they live in one or two rooms? Besides, we have a lake nearby and a clearing. Store in walking distance and in general, developed infrastructure. I'll even do the repairs myself. If only they could exchange apartments.
Peels mother of the second child But no. This stubborn couple still doesn't want to move. They both make excuses. Like they have friends living there and flowers planted under the windows, you know? That is, their grandchildren and only son should huddle in a one-room kennel. Do they have flowers? I don't understand that.
Yes, and we also recently learned that a girl should be born. This means that children's belongings can be thrown away. And we must immediately start buying a dress and overalls, tights and shoes. But this pleasure is not cheap. My husband must be tired too. There is simply no other option than with mother-in-law.
How do you influence two old men? How do you make them feel, considering that I am the wife of their only son, which means a bad person, a lazy person and a witch in general? Did anyone have a similar situation in their biography? I would love to read some useful advice. Now I will put my son to bed and I will definitely have twenty minutes for myself. Thank you in advance to all concerned. And who, perhaps, my words frightened, please do not be afraid. Just set your priorities right. And you can do it. I will!
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