Is it possible to protect a child from the bad influence of friends without spoiling the relationship with him?

Parents are the most important people in a child’s life. The duty of mom and dad is to provide your child with everything necessary for his health, full development and safety. Care is to protect the child from negative influence from the outside. As the child grows up, this influence increases. Friends in the life of a child, colleagues, acquaintances will somehow influence his self-esteem, development, thinking.

When a child grows up and finds friends, he trusts them more than his parents. And parents start to worry because they're worried they won't be able to protect their child from potential danger outside the home. The only thing parents miss is what we're going to talk about today.



Neurophysiologist, specialist in the field of applied psychology Kirill Khmarsky says that the prohibitions of parents do not protect the child from all the bad. A child’s behavior is formed before he or she makes his or her first friends outside the family. It is the family that forms the child’s stereotypes, priorities and worldview, habits, facial expressions, behavior. A child like a sponge absorbs everything that surrounds him and adapts to the environment in which he is.



Research in neurophysiology and neuroscience suggests that human behavior is predetermined at the genetic level. This means that if a child’s friends behave inappropriately, they have seen this behavior in the family and copy it. As friends, children choose their own kind. Thus, the only way to protect a child from all the bad is to raise him by the person who will resent bad behavior. This option is possible under one condition: parents are obliged to analyze their behavior and, without crooking their hearts, work out their own shortcomings in behavior.



In adolescence, friends for a child are more important than parents. Because during this period of growing up, the child is looking for himself and a similar circle of communication. Condemning your child’s behavior, preferences, and appearance undermines their trust in their parents. Especially when parents try to protect teenagers from the bad influence of friends, this further provokes the child to communicate with them.



The first thing to do is stop criticizing. Even if a child agrees with their parents that their friends are behaving badly, they will still protect their friends. It should be understood that if a parent criticizes friends, then he criticizes his child, and this only aggravates the situation.

For a child to begin to trust you, you need to learn to communicate with him, and not prohibit everything. Sometimes parents forbid completely meaningless things. You should always explain the reason for your behavior. You can’t just say, “I don’t like your friend, stop talking to him.” It is necessary to explain the specific actions of a suspicious friend that cause you anxiety: “I do not want you to get into trouble like your friend, because I am worried about you”, “You have reliable friends, but they have trouble with the law, I want to protect you”.



Peels Parents have the right to make rules to protect the child. Walking with friends late or staying with friends should be earned. If a child undermines the trust of the parents, he should be punished. Not physically or screaming. Punishment in the form of a ban on walking late, deprivation of the phone and so on. The child must be responsible for his actions and realize that negative actions lead to negative consequences. It is better for parents to do this than to wait for the child to break the law.



Be interested in your child’s life, ask about how the day went and whether the child needs help. It is very simple and difficult to build an indestructible bridge between parents and children. You have to spend all your time, all your love and patience. If you can not find a common language with a teenager, contact a psychologist who will help eradicate distrust in communication.