Why children move and how to cope with the course of events

When there are children, it is not easy for young parents. People who are used to taking care of themselves are forced to radically change their schedule and adjust it for the child. All life becomes different, it begins to revolve around a small creature that requires constant attention, day and night.

And one of the thoughts that warms parentage Even in the most difficult moments, something like this: "Well, that's okay, the baby will grow up." Then we can rest. And in old age he will give someone a glass of water.”





But children grow up and leave the nestOlder mom and dad are suddenly unprepared for freedom and loneliness. It would seem that they should be happy that the child grew up and became independent.



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But with his passing, parents often lose their sense of existence. This feeling of devastation is so common that psychologists have even given it a name – empty nest syndrome.

The more attached parents are to their children and the lower their ability to live independently, the harder it is for them to survive the departure of offspring from home.





If the father and mother in recent years connected only the concerns of the child: his studies, playing the violin, athletics, then after the transition of the child into adulthood, they realize that they have lost a connecting thread.

Often, these parents begin to control their children. Has the boy grown up and is going on a date with a new girl? Tell me about her now. What family is she from? What's he doing? Show me the photo...

Such ubiquitous control will only push the child away from the parents. He will see how they are worried about any trifle, and simply will not share the details of his life, so that beloved mom and dad do not worry and do not drink sedatives.



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If you are loving parents and your child is about to run out of the nest, it causes a mixture of feelings of anxiety, resentment and fear. So we need to act urgently.

1. Expand your own interests
   The child needs to be given freedom, so switch attention. You can either get new acquaintances, or discover a new hobby, or sign up for training courses.
2. Play sports.
   A universal tool that will help to distract from heavy thinking and return the former cheerfulness. You can just go jogging or at least walking.
   
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3. Change of job or occupation
   While in recent years work schedules have been child-centred, they are no longer necessary. Do what interests you, because now you can afford more freedom.
4. Lead an active social life
   We must not allow life to lack live communication. Make new acquaintances, renew old connections. You can't lock yourself in. The more joyful moments there are in each day, the easier it is to survive the separation from children.
   
   
   
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5. Spend more time with the other half.
   Spouses have something in common besides their children. They may have forgotten what it was. But these shared interests need to be renewed. Pay more attention to each other. May the time spent together be pleasant for both.
   
   
   
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It is important to accept the reality and understand that children have grown up. They were prepared for this moment when they began to build their adult lives. They can be helped, they can be advised, but it is impossible to build this adult life in their place.

It's like sending a kid to kindergarten or bringing him to first grade, only more serious. But the child has grown up, he is quite an independent person who is ready to show what is worth. You don't have to stop him from doing that. The kids are grown. What do I do? Enjoy your own life.

How did your parents feel about breaking up with you? Share your memories in the comments!