Why do kids have to go to clubs, how they should be and how to understand happiness it is for a child or the torture?At the time, I've managed not to succumb to the universal movement for the development of super-abilities in infants, and up to 3 years (crazy!) my eldest daughter had not attended any circles.
In three years we went to classes on the Montessori system, but without me there child was bad, and we stopped going.
It was really exciting, but my daughter was not ready.And I left her alone, because it is very often the best thing to do.
And with a 4.5 man broke through and she rolled me a list of what I wanted to do:music, rock climbing, rollerblading, swimming, painting, dancing, "to go to school as adults," and then to wishes added tennis and most recently singing.
I tried to take her to a climbing wall, dancing, drawing and clay modeling, to bring in the adult pool. Mode, schedule and success of the classes has varied under the influence of travel, illness, change of interests and other things. Now, five plus years, she goes to the climbing wall once a week, tennis two times, twice to prepare for school and creative workshops.
I watch as the daughter: if she does not get tired too much if she likes classes, willingly if she goes there. It made me think, why are we doing this, what I want, what he wants daughter. Here's what happens:1.
I want my children to understand:at any time you can do almost anything, to change the type of activity, to learn anything, and do it for yourself and professionally.
In order to have children had that choice and understanding, I give you the opportunity to try and support in difficult moments.
Just hand over the child to some study group and did not make the participation process — the path to nowhere.2. Any activity can unwittingly turn into suffering,
and this is very bad, especially in childhood.
We were on the verge of it with climbing: walking three times a week, for two hours, my daughter became very good at it. I bought her special shoes that were uncomfortable, and she refused to climb and then did not want to go to class.
It turned out that she didn't like the attitude of the coach to the boys and especially the fact that I was away on business and missed her workout. And we stopped going there.If the first was good and then became bad, I should not break the child and force him to do.
Six months later, the daughter asked to take her to the climbing wall again and be with her there. My daughter loved it, gladly agrees to make routes. We agreed that I draw and read while she trained, but be sure to observe difficult new routes. In addition, you severely choose a trainer/teacher to observe the interaction with the child.
Before to give the child to class, preferably several times to go there together and make sure that happiness and enjoyment of children a priority.3.Parents pressure that we must give the child all that he was successful
but the secret is not the number of clubs and courses that he attends, the secret to happiness.
A lot of circles — not bad, little circles — not bad, a complete lack of circles — not bad. Sensation, but if the child is not to touch, he's not overgrown with moss, did not turn into a vegetable, and the rest and then is interested in something myself.4.It is important to consider what kind of base.
Education/training of the mind (chess, mathematics, languages, oratory); outdoor exercise (sports, dance); creativity (music, art classes, programming, sewing, robotics, Yes, even knitting with embroidery), and her construct system of classes.But it is not necessary to turn the child into a permanent race school-homework-courses-sports-food-sleep.
It is important to follow a good person or not. In addition, not all Hobbies and skills necessary courses or training. If I know I can teach a child something myself, or maybe dad, you prefer to find at this time.
Furthermore, children themselves often find ways to learn something. My children have learned loads of songs, learned how to recognize colors, to count to 10-20, remember the names of animals, and all this in English,just because it is interesting.5. You should try and be an example.
First, when the parents something to do with enthusiasm, the interest and the desire is transferred to the child. Secondly, it is very important to be calm, to really get pleasure from the process, to take failure as an experience, not the end of everything, and so on.
Well, of course, not to shift on the shoulders of the child to his unrealized ambitions.
I see a dad in training for tennis. Every time he brings daughter to tears with frustration and with phrases like "stop whining and train better."6.
There are many factors that affect success in the classroom something, but one of the most important: peace of mind, support and confidence of parents and teachers.
It is important to remain calm, and possibly reduce their parental expectations. To see the difference between when the child is no longer interested/don't need something and when he is discouraged by a failure and is just waiting for support.
You can't compare with others. Compare only the achievements of the child: a month ago you didn't know how to do something, and now I can, that's great.7.
If the child wants to do everything-you have to give him to try to throw as much as necessary.
The teenager also need to give you the tools and show their purpose, and he will know what to do, and it is necessary to believe. Schooling certain subjects does not give a volumetric picture of the world, it is the task of parents.8.
It is important to understand that children from the same family are different and don't have to do the same.
Parents of siblings know how different kids can be in the temper, food preferences, tastes in clothes. Similarly with classes. It is certainly convenient to unload all in one place, in two hours to pick up and relax, but not always. And blame them for it.
It is believed that without forcing the world would not be Paganini and Beethoven, great athletes and scholars.What if acceptance, love and support, the world would be many times more geniuses and they would not necessarily be unhappy?
Author: Sasha Pais
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©