On the run

-K Monks this pair of idiots, that's exactly facing each other. Rather would have married, and restrain the enthusiasm, and that they did not hut and continuous hotbed vanilizma.
 - What?
 - He gave her a Labrador puppy. Now she wrote with happiness, he wrote of her gratitude, and puppy write simple way for the company.

and general cleaning after it became clear that there was a three-day cat constipation ...

Sorry, I forgot your name.
She: Remember my name, as Pugacheva!
He: Yemelyan or what ?! He:

 - I bought three ceramic pans, do not know how to tell her husband about it, he's out of the house expel me with the words: "You-and-and-and cook three meals a go-o-od, zache-e-em ?! »
 - And really, why three?
 - Why, because zelenenkaja, reds and oranzhevenkaya!

When I go with my husband to shop and he says: "I'll pay!" - I think he wants to change the emphasis ...

-And My bones laptop presented. He is so small greens!
 - Now you sleep with him?
-What Do you know?
 - Actually, I'm talking about a laptop ...

Read in the internet that, according to the Moscow City Court decision and the statement of the Russian Orthodox Church in the churches no trade, and there is a transfer of goods for donation. Today went to the temple, donated ruble and tried to carry a gold cross. So my dear little censer killed ...

-Hi! You can give me money?
 - What?
 - Well ... In memory

-Leh, Count, my iPhone is already the fifth day keeps charging !!!
 - Wow, just like my Samsung for 800 rubles.