Great anger

There is a remarkable feeling – anger. A very important and necessary for humans, but, unfortunately, anger in our world were branded as "bad" emotion. As the worst... Because anger provokes aggressive behavior, being one of those emotions that nourish it, and aggression – it is something from the "ordinary"



frame from the movie "Gladiator", Director Ridley Scott

And if you think about it and try to get in touch with anger, you can feel an enormous energy resource, a prisoner in it. Perhaps this is one of the most powerful emotions. Why is it so often banned?

The problem with anger is that the emotion is aimed at the destruction of the situation. Its function is to give energy to something to destroy, to break, blow up, and thereby to make changes. Of course, it can be quite dangerous, especially if a person lives surrounded by their own kind. And human culture begins to develop ways to curb anger. For example, to turn anger into resentment – not so destructive and dangerous. Or completely wrapped up in anger at the person, transforming it in guilt. Yes, resentment and guilt destroy himself, but safe for others. People who anyone not angry (or, more precisely, that anger not expressed), very comfortable.

However, such treatment with his anger leads to one important consequence: it is a step towards the formation of dependent personality. If you are unable to get angry at someone, or angry, rapidly hiding the anger (God forbid he/she will see and feel!) – are you dependent on this man. Anger destroys, and if the value of connection with someone ("force pull") exceeds the value of his own liberty ("repulsive force") – we can't get rid. People suffering from unrequited love, neurotic, addiction, can't send to hell "favorite", who repeatedly deny their feelings. This is not possible: the horror of disconnection so strong that it is easier to fall into a sense of his own nothingness, think that he/she is beautiful, and you're simply unworthy of/unworthy (that is, turning the anger on themselves). After all, if you get mad and "send" you could lose the contact from which such a value... Easier to idealize and cling to the illusion.

So angry at the person who depend on – is very problematic. You can generally suppress anger before you realize it, but you can recognise it, but not to Express – and, thus, choke and poison her. Often encounter a situation where financially dependent children/spouses filled with rage to the parents/partners but are unable to Express it directly – they are afraid of losing their livelihood. There is one important point. You can just be mad and do nothing, and then there is physical presence, the intoxication of anger. And you can feel the anger and direct it into action. For example, quit the force to overcome the financial dependence. The alternative is to become a victim. The victim's condition is extremely aggressive and embittered but passive. The victim feels a lot of anger, but not sending it in a private action. It encourages others to act.

Anger – the initial stage of addiction (any kind – love, financial, etc.). If a man feels it clearly is the first step. To be angry at "dearly loved one" is important. "How can you get mad at him!" — exclaim, romantically-minded girl, educated in the ideals of selflessness and sacrificial love, even this love is unrequited, and lasts for three years. Quietly, she suffers, and to say (even in an empty apartment) "Yes get the hell out, not just you don't care about my feelings!" — can not. It's "bad."

"Bad" is not it. Anger can be aimed at changing the situation – and this is its positive aspect. In anger we can do very, very much. Anger burns through fear and shame, removing the guilt, removing the barriers that stop our movement. People, compressed within itself, experiencing itself as useless or "wrong", that is being in shame or guilt, using anger can grow and develop. But she could still be sent to the change/destruction (annihilation) is not a situation for a person, and this is dangerous. "I'm fed up with this situation in our relationship!" — energy goes on the situation. "I'm sick of your bitchiness!" man. Beat, crush, destroy and suppress the human... the Question is not anger as such. And that where we direct that anger and how we Express.

In General, the ability to send the situation or even some people to hell (without trying most of these people change) – a very important ability. However, this is only the first step. I don't like to be angry. I love the feel of anger and transform it into action aimed at change. "Evil people" also focus only on the experience of anger. They are not transformerait anything, but simply destroyed.

PS And Yes, I almost forgot: a simple passive slosh of anger on a pillow or screaming somewhere in the open field, the situation is not transformerait, and therefore does not help. Gives only temporary relief couple. But it is a passive anger. Anger of the victim. published

Author: Ilya Latypov

P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©

Source: tumbalele.livejournal.com/57966.html?thread=1699950