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Simple ways to help your child cope with anger
Bashny.Net
I often have to deal with the fact that the manifestation of anger, anger at the child, the parents think something is wrong and abnormal. When a child openly expresses his wrath – we do not know how to react.
Let's talk a little about it.
Anger is a natural human emotion, one of many that we occasionally experience. Aggression is a physical ACTION in the other person, when we experience anger.
When we adults feel anger, irritation — we often know what's happening and how it can be dealt with. We can his anger: to Express, to repress, to hide, to keep to yourself, tell your friends or loved ones, we can kick anger foot sofa, smoke a cigarette, to stand under the shower, hit his fist on the table, etc. etc. We usually do not show aggression towards the other, because we know various other ways to cope with anger.
Children, when experiencing anger, do not understand what is happening to them, as it is called, and how to deal with it. They can say, "Go away", "fool", "Bad mom," "I Hate you", "I'm not going to be friends with you" and very seldom can say, "I'm mad at you".
The kids are having a life "totally", they are fully in the present moment, they are spontaneous and sincere in the manifestation of their feelings, live the "here and now" and often are at the mercy of emotions.
It is very important that the parents did not forbid the child to Express feelings of anger (and other feelings too), didn't shame him for it and is not abused, but rather helped him.
How to help?
THE TASK OF PARENTS
1) to Help the child to understand what was happening to himthrough words, to verbalize his feeling to explain that to him now.
For example: "I see that you're angry now" "I know you're mad".
2) Show that you understand WHAT is now mad child:
"I see that you are angry because you want to play my phone, and I'm not allowed", "You're mad at me because there is something...", "because you want to...", "because you give...".
3) to Say that you understand it:
"I understand you, I'd be pissed off too in your place" "I understand, I don't like to finish an interesting case," "I felt the same way when I was little...".
4) help the child to tell in their own words what he feels:
"You can tell me: "I feel angry", "I feel angry", "I'm so mad that I want everything scatter", "I'm so mad I want to punch you" (the child such thoughts arise, you just about it did not guess. To say not to do, let him tell you about it better and it will be easier).
5) to Identify limitations on physical aggression against people, animals, teach the child to redirect his anger out on other inanimate objects, to Express it in acceptable ways.
SOMETHING TO REDIRECT YOUR ANGER
Offer the child options relieve stress and to "clear out" your anger: "When you are angry, beat the others cannot, you can do this: (your choice).
Let's you:
— beating the pillow with hands!
— leaves pillow!
— kicked the pillow with legs!
— throw the soft toys (in the basket on the floor, on the sofa)
— we will be mashing in a bundle of sheets of paper! (regular A4 sheets sharply crumple into a ball in 1 second)
— paper leaves lumps in the wall or each other!
— tear paper!
— we call vegetables: “You are an eggplant! Your turn!" "Are you a carrot", "You're a cabbage!"
— draw on who you get mad and then SecuriCam!
— blind on who you're mad, and then scrunch!
All this should not just tell but to show to the child, showing how to do it, and involve him in the process. Every time you see that he is angry, give voice to his feelings, show understanding and support and offer him some of the options above. Most likely, over time, he will be your favorite way, and he will be able to do it without you.
Also interesting: different does not understand Why parents hit children
What to do if a child is greedy
This way you help the child throw power, to discharge my negative emotion, it does not cause harm to themselves, adults or other children. You show that you respect the child's feelings, but set certain restrictions on their expression, forbidding aggression, but helping in other ways to cope with feelings of anger and to Express it.
P. S. mom and Dad also would not hurt to periodically arrange with each other pillow fight, it works.published
Author: Catherine KES
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©
Source: vk.com/ekaterina_kes?w=wall-6084434_4498
Let's talk a little about it.
Anger is a natural human emotion, one of many that we occasionally experience. Aggression is a physical ACTION in the other person, when we experience anger.
When we adults feel anger, irritation — we often know what's happening and how it can be dealt with. We can his anger: to Express, to repress, to hide, to keep to yourself, tell your friends or loved ones, we can kick anger foot sofa, smoke a cigarette, to stand under the shower, hit his fist on the table, etc. etc. We usually do not show aggression towards the other, because we know various other ways to cope with anger.
Children, when experiencing anger, do not understand what is happening to them, as it is called, and how to deal with it. They can say, "Go away", "fool", "Bad mom," "I Hate you", "I'm not going to be friends with you" and very seldom can say, "I'm mad at you".
The kids are having a life "totally", they are fully in the present moment, they are spontaneous and sincere in the manifestation of their feelings, live the "here and now" and often are at the mercy of emotions.
It is very important that the parents did not forbid the child to Express feelings of anger (and other feelings too), didn't shame him for it and is not abused, but rather helped him.
How to help?
THE TASK OF PARENTS
1) to Help the child to understand what was happening to himthrough words, to verbalize his feeling to explain that to him now.
For example: "I see that you're angry now" "I know you're mad".
2) Show that you understand WHAT is now mad child:
"I see that you are angry because you want to play my phone, and I'm not allowed", "You're mad at me because there is something...", "because you want to...", "because you give...".
3) to Say that you understand it:
"I understand you, I'd be pissed off too in your place" "I understand, I don't like to finish an interesting case," "I felt the same way when I was little...".
4) help the child to tell in their own words what he feels:
"You can tell me: "I feel angry", "I feel angry", "I'm so mad that I want everything scatter", "I'm so mad I want to punch you" (the child such thoughts arise, you just about it did not guess. To say not to do, let him tell you about it better and it will be easier).
5) to Identify limitations on physical aggression against people, animals, teach the child to redirect his anger out on other inanimate objects, to Express it in acceptable ways.
SOMETHING TO REDIRECT YOUR ANGER
Offer the child options relieve stress and to "clear out" your anger: "When you are angry, beat the others cannot, you can do this: (your choice).
Let's you:
— beating the pillow with hands!
— leaves pillow!
— kicked the pillow with legs!
— throw the soft toys (in the basket on the floor, on the sofa)
— we will be mashing in a bundle of sheets of paper! (regular A4 sheets sharply crumple into a ball in 1 second)
— paper leaves lumps in the wall or each other!
— tear paper!
— we call vegetables: “You are an eggplant! Your turn!" "Are you a carrot", "You're a cabbage!"
— draw on who you get mad and then SecuriCam!
— blind on who you're mad, and then scrunch!
All this should not just tell but to show to the child, showing how to do it, and involve him in the process. Every time you see that he is angry, give voice to his feelings, show understanding and support and offer him some of the options above. Most likely, over time, he will be your favorite way, and he will be able to do it without you.
Also interesting: different does not understand Why parents hit children
What to do if a child is greedy
This way you help the child throw power, to discharge my negative emotion, it does not cause harm to themselves, adults or other children. You show that you respect the child's feelings, but set certain restrictions on their expression, forbidding aggression, but helping in other ways to cope with feelings of anger and to Express it.
P. S. mom and Dad also would not hurt to periodically arrange with each other pillow fight, it works.published
Author: Catherine KES
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©
Source: vk.com/ekaterina_kes?w=wall-6084434_4498
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