Why do we lie and why we suffer, when we're being lied to

I think that there is no need to give a precise definition; no doubt, we all know what a lie is. We all do not again resort to deceit and themselves become its victims. We would like to eradicate the lie, but in the end we accept it as an inevitable and necessary evil.

Why is this happening? Why do we lie though and regret it? Why suffer when you lie to us? Maybe because there is something more powerful than lies, that is not visible to a superficial analysis?






VARIOUS FORMS OF DECEPTION

We do not claim to give a comprehensive description of all shades of lies, and I want to mention just some of the most common of them.

Silencewhen you want to say something important and real — is also one of the forms of lies, rejection of the truth.

Some consider this silence a manifestation of prudence. But even wisdom has its limits, clicking which may bring more harm than good. This fraud is manifested in the fact that you pretend to know nothing, or cease to insist on what was sure completely. This flight from the truth.

It is hidden under the mask of counterfeit astonishment at the ambiguity of words, not expressing nothing but the desire to get out of this situation. It is a forced smile or "sorry" when you do not regret it. It's crocodile tears and "heartfelt" hug, full of cynicism.

The one who's hiding something, often have to change their position — not because consciously shifts from one opinion to another, but because it needs many masks to fit in under the circumstances. Do not be surprised when they say something completely opposite of what sounded an hour ago.

Is "white lie", but is really lying, distorting and perverting the truth for the sake of someone's interests and needs.

Leave aside compassion, softening, or slightly altering the truth, not to hurt the soul of those who are really in distress. We are concerned about a pure lie, an ordinary lie in our daily life. It brings suffering, but that it is curious, to varying degrees, in the end it all agree.

VARIETIES OF LANGUAGE

Whatever number dialects or possession of mankind, there are other languages that reflect the most profound aspects of the human personality. These international languages is much richer and more significant than it might seem at first glance.

Man as an integral part of nature combines the characteristic features of different kingdoms. It has some minerals, of plants, things from animals, and, of course, from people.

The minerals we borrowed static, leaving our muscles are immobile, at least on the face, making it "stone". This corresponds to the already mentioned cheating silence.

The plants taught us to bend, like the boughs by the winds of opinion blowing in different directions. Neither one of them it is impossible to accept — not because they cannot be opposing views, but because we cannot perceive them all at the same time or constantly fluctuate from blow winds, blowing from everywhere.

From the animals we took sign language. Our gestures so spontaneous that leave no room to cheat. And although in one words, sounds, body movement, no matter how elusive they may be, tell a different story. There is a huge amount of literature about body language and non-verbal language in General, of which we have so much to learn, but the instinctive impulse is superior to rational knowledge: the face, eyes and hands say more than the mouth, and thus give the truth.

Own language of the people rich and inventive... of deceit and subterfuge. Now in Vogue to speak a huge amount of words and not say anything or say the opposite of what I wanted to say really.

We resent the process of impoverishment of language when words are reduced to a vulgar exclamation or ambiguous expressions, but it never ceases to amaze, as with such a sparse number of terms, you can continue to lie so successfully.

I would not want to suggest that the human tongue is false in itself. But all people know how to play with the language, adapting it to what is beneficial to say. It can neither minerals nor plants, nor animals. Sorry that this plasticity of language is not the mind, and tricks. To tell the truth is usually dangerous, these games are not made to play in "civilized" society.

 

WHY LIE?

The basis of all cases liein one form or another, we see one common psychological factor — fear. Here it is, a real disease, and numerous deceptions is its symptoms or consequences.

Consider the case of "prudent silence." This is the fear of risk. To speak to find your true way of thinking, means to fail in their own eyes or in the eyes of others. And it requires enormous courage. Sometimes the fear of risk leads to painful cowardice that is still a fear.

One who changes his mind from any whiff of the winds of fashion, demonstrates the fear of losing respect. To be distinct, to say the truth when others are trying to hide it, to distort or to ignore, to look a white crow — for this you need very big courage. It is much easier to cover with a veil of lies and commonly accepted to be part of a group that is strong in its unity.

People who hide their feelings and thoughts, afraid to stand for what it really is, due to the fact that he was afraid to know itself, or because others may see him defenseless. There is nothing worse than feeling contempt for those who combine fashion values and who are by any means ready to destroy the man with a clear and open face.The idea is simple: if we all lie in one and the same, this lie is nothing to do, how to become a reality.

The lie is deeply holds all our fears: fear itself, before people, before life and its circumstances, before the situations in which we find ourselves and which we must pass. A lie is a form of hypocrisy, an attempt to look at things a little on the other hand, pursuing their own benefit: if I can't or don't know how to change what makes me suffer, I'm painting reality in a different color and imagine that this all changed.

Does the deception of evil? Is it only fear? If there's some underestimating the intelligence and ability to understand those who have, we believe, no reason to notice the deception?

That lie is really a lie, gives us the unconscious language. This leads us to the conclusion that animals (or unconscious, what is hidden in us) is much more truthful than the "combed" culture.

 

CONSEQUENCES OF CHEATING

We have already noted that the main destructive factor of deception is fear. Join selfishness, cowardice, lack of confidence, uncontrolled fantasy, not distinguishing the real from the false and actually evil, the desire to harm. If these are the reasons, the consequences could be terrible and dangerous.

They manifest themselves in the form of a let is required, but false actions, senseless pricks, wounds and grievances, which we give without hesitation, but do not forgive if they are applied to us. The distrust goes beyond all limits. Nobody trusts anybody; moreover, not admitting it, people are a little do not trust even to themselves.

Endless hours are spent talking about what actually exists. Hundreds of pages be written with the in order to Express neverojatnoe or say something that would misrepresent. Time and not return.

Completely lacking trust in friendship and in politics, in science and in religion. If I cheat, then why should I believe what others are telling the truth? Who to believe? Someone to love? What I want to convince? What do you want me to? And if I try to rise above others, why wouldn't they use me?

From this stems the law itself is untrue: no one is sincere in his words, no one tells the truth, everything else is a deception.

Every moment life is becoming more artificial, and human relations are meaningless because they are based on falsehood and instability. In order to survive, you must learn a new language with a long name "What I want to say when I say what I say"...






 

SOME SOLUTIONS

The main thing — is to overcome fear. But it is impossible to get rid of overnight. You need to gradually replace it with other, more exalted, state. Let's start with politeness in the true sense of the wordas a noble respect for others and yourself. This courtesy may contain some tacit prudence or compassionate some lies to ease the psychological burden, but first and foremost is the understanding and service, simple dedication and subtlety of the soul. Blatant lie scattered, like a cloud under the hot rays of the sun, when meeting with the regenerating energy of generosity, in the light of which the ego becomes a barely noticeable shadow.

It is also necessary to "know thyself". The ancient philosophers said that this is the first step to the knowledge of the gods and the Universe that allows us to know and people with whom we share our existence. If we know them, and really, why lie? When there is no hypocrisy and secret ill will, didn't have the sense of tricks and gimmicks?

We would add that we need to control distorting the reality of the fantasy and see reality with clear eyes. This does not mean to accept the fact that we don't like in the world around us, on the contrary know exactly what we want to change and improve. Imagination, like a veil, hides the fact that we are not satisfied, but she is not able to move and grit from his seat. And finally, it takes courage, lots of courage. It's lost dignity, which no stones, nor plants, nor animals, but which again brings the authenticity of the fact that the artificial pressure of society makes people cowardly and deceitful.

Author: Delia Steinberg Guzman

 

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

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Source: www.manwb.ru/articles/psychology/inner_world/PorQueMentir_DSG/

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