Never too late to become a mother

Relationships with parents are not always add up smoothly, and sometimes have to make considerable efforts to develop them. < Website

I have a childhood friend. At school, the parents beat her belt - a thick, soldiers - for four (had to be only five), with the loose hair ( "so go only prostitutes"), for what she called her mother her mother, not mom, for being washed hands linen is not invented by mom scheme, but simply erased. Because invite friends home - it was forbidden. And a lot of that.

< It is terribly jealous of my relationship with my mother.
Recently, we met her, very happy with each other, shared news of the past ten years. She said: "My mother and I were in such an interesting show!" - Or "Dad advised me to go to such and such a MBA course and he understands this," - or, "I love to go with my mother to shop, her great

taste. " The more I listened, the more clearly understand what my friend with her parents - are the same adults, equitable, harmonious, warm, close and trusting relationship, that most of my friends could not even dream
And I could not stand it. I asked directly: "HOW ?! How are you able to reach such a friendship after all, it was "Here in my heart I was expecting the usual responses from the series:" I understand, let go and forgive. " Or: "I realized that parents are not eternal." Or: "If they did not beat me, I would become a drug addict and a prostitute, and I am grateful to them for their care." A friend thought and said: "You know, my mother just apologized, and my father said that he was ashamed - his life brought a belt, so he did not know anything else. < And now, they are very sorry for what happened. But most importantly, they do seem to have changed.
me. " And then I - no, I do not cry, I have to do too much willpower - thought it's never too late. < In each of us sits a longing for my mother. No matter how many years you may be, you need a mother.
Many again and again come to the family home despite the fact that each meeting ends with tears and scandal. Try to start a conversation about the past - it is usually the parents angry. Response tactics have four. Firstly, they do not remember anything, "There was no such! You still invent. " Secondly, laugh off, "let bygones be bygones!" Third, the discount: "Again you about this, well, how much can you already!" Fourth, rationalize, "If I had not made you sit on textbooks when everyone walked, you would not be admitted to the Institute. " All it usually takes huge chunks of the soul and the life of the daughters, who are trying to lead such conversations. And by and large it is absolutely pointless.

Besides, why? < After all, the past can not be corrected and can not rewrite. Whatever you do, you will never be comfortable easy childhood and caring parents who understand.
Many reproached himself for being unable to forgive feel petty and vindictive, ashamed of their offense and their hide. Only issue here is much thinner. When a person tries to repeatedly clarify some situation with his parents, he is not trying to change the past. < He wants to make sure that parents have changed.
< This article is about the fact that he never later to become a mother




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