5 ideal tips to agree on anything

Every day we are engaged in negotiations, starting with the resolution of conflicts with customers or suppliers and ending with attempts to reduce the bill for a guided tour or get a promotion. Below are a few keys to get what you want, is not conning not neglecting the needs of the other person.

1. Listen

This is one of the most important and often misunderstood points. It seems that there is a complex, all we hear when we are talking. But is it? Conducted psychological studies have found that 60% of talk time with the person with whom we communicate on the need arose, we perform the so-called "mental sleep," ie, like we listen, but the consciousness is disconnected. We can even at the right moments to nod his head, and in the end, have a general idea about the conversation, but in fact, we are far from it. Thus, the brain is "coping" with unnecessary and boring for him information. But we can change that - just to make a little effort on and concentrate on what you said opponent. In addition to the banal respect that we express by simply "listening", immersed in the conversation, we can completely control the process of negotiation, influencing him and resulting in the fact that we need it.

2. Use the rule of "50 to 50»

How often during the talks you really focus on what you really want, do not carried away by the arguments of the second part? And how often do you think about the other party wants and how you could help her in this? Yes, you heard right. Negotiations on that and there are not to stubbornly stick to their line, knocking out the other, whatever it is you want, and reasonable agreement on the most favorable conditions for both sides. The famous American psychologist and writer Ed Brodou in his book "negotiations" leading example of the operation of this method in dealing with his teenage son. Like most teenagers, the son wants parents did not interfere in his life, but as long as it shares the blood and stored on their content, of complete independence is not out of the question. Therefore, in response to the fact that "parents are left alone" - Brodou uses typically 50 to 50: "In order for us to leave you alone - you need to do something that will help us understand that you are an adult and you really can quietly left alone. " Thus, in these "negotiations" will satisfy the desires of both sides: the teenager - he will get "parents, leave him alone," plus more freedom and independence, and the author, who will receive the child, follow the rules and do what is necessary for its future development.

3. Find the total. Be friendly

Another key point is to find a common "ground" in the negotiations. You will be easier to find common ground and quickly reach an understanding, if you are passionate about a common theme. For example, if you collect something, it will be easier to negotiate the price with the seller, who also shares your passion. But in fact, virtually anyone can find a common language. Be friendly, do not just "take the bull by the horns" or to conflict. Being in advance of confrontation as a person, and with the idea of ​​an agreement, you are not setting yourself up for the most successful outcome.