Instructions screwdriving gift in the presence of reactive cat

1. Clean plenty of room on the table for wrapping present.
2. Go to the closet, get out of there with a gift bag and close the door.
3. Open the door and remove cat from cupboard.
4. Go to cupboard and retrieve rolls of wrapping paper.
5. Go back and remove cat from cupboard.
6. Go to the drawer and remove the tape, tape, scissors, labels, etc.
7. Arrange the gifts and packing materials on the table to develop a strategy for future action.
8. Go back to drawer to get string, remove cat that has been in the drawer since, when you looked at him one last time, and take the rope.
9. Reopen drawer and pulled out the cat again.
10. Pull out the gift of the package.
11. Remove cat from the bag.
12. Open box to check present, remove cat from box, replace present in place.
13. Expand the wrapping paper so that you can measure it.
14. Try to smooth out paper; realizing that the cat is under the paper, pull it out.
15. Cut the required piece of paper, trying to cut a straight line.
16. Throw away first sheet because cat tried to chase the scissors and tore paper.
17. Cut second sheet of paper to size by putting cat ... in a package of podpodarka.
18. Place present on cut to the size of a piece of wrapping paper.
19. Lift up edges of paper to seal, then poudivlyaytes why edges do not agree, understand, finally, that between present and paper is a cat. Take the cat and make another attempt.
20. Place present on paper, keep it to not move until you cut the adhesive tape.
21. Spend next 20 minutes carefully trying to remove transparent sticky tape from cat with the help of pair of nail scissors.
22. Glue wrapping paper with sticky tape, making corners were as neat as possible.
23. Look where missing a coil of tape, and then throw in the chase cat down hall to take his belt.
24. Try to tie a gift ribbon up and down.
25. Rewind the tape and remove paper that is now torn due to cat's enthusiasm in the pursuit of the tip of the tape.
26. Repeat steps 13-20 as long as you will not have the last piece of paper.
27. Decide to skip steps 13-17 in order to save time and reduce risk of losing last sheet of paper. Find old cardboard box that you know, just the right size for sheet of paper.
28. Put present in box and tie it with a rope.
29. Untie the rope, open the box and pull it out of the cat.
30. Put all packing materials in bag with present and head into the room where you can lock yourself.
31. Having retired to the room, lock the door and start to re-lay out packing materials.
32. Remove cat from box, unlock door, put cat outside door, close and lock it.
33. Repeat the previous step as many times as required. Until you hear the cries of a cat outside the door.
34. Spread out last sheet of paper. (I know it's difficult to close the toilet. But try.)
35. And then you notice that the cat has reached the paper. Unlock the door and look in all the cupboards piece of last year's wrapping paper, until you remember that you have any piece of no more with the help of a cat in the packaging of gifts last year.
36. Go back to the bathroom, lock the door and sit on the toilet, trying to figure out how to make more or less presentable scattered pieces of paper.
37. Seal box, wrap with paper and start the "repair" by careful bonding tape torn places. Now tie a ribbon and decorate with bows to hide the most "affected" by the cat's claws place.
38. Attach the sticker, and then sit on the toilet and admire his work, he congratulated himself on the fact that you were able to save a bad job.
39. Unlock the door and go to the kitchen to make himself something to drink and feed cat.
40. Spend next 15 minutes looking for cat until coming to obvious conclusion.
41. Unwrap present, untie box and remove cat.
42. Pull out trash thrown all torn pieces of wrapping paper, feed the cat and go back to your secluded little room for last attempt, making certain you are alone and the door is locked.
43. Find least torn and crumpled pieces of paper, as well as those that are most suitable size.
44. vain attempt to wrap a gift in scraps of paper glued together. Tie ribbon box, which is now in some rags, and decorate with the now crumpled bows. Stick the sticker and put the box in the bag, so that no one saw the horror did not.
45. During the presentation of gifts cute smile, looking at the gift recipient's face as they try to hide their contempt about awarding them the badly wrapped present.
46. ​​Swear to yourself that next year you ask the goddamn gift wrapped in the store.