How to become more sociable and confident if you do not feel comfortable in society

Imagine a crowded hall, where dozens of strangers communicate, exchange ideas and business cards.
At this moment, you are standing aside, mentally convincing yourself that you are “not at your plate.”
Familiar? In fact, the feeling of discomfort in society is very common.
And most of all, it binds those who can't or don't want to get out of their comfort zone.
But as my experience with many different people shows,
From the popular celebrities to those who just find their place in the sun,
Becoming more sociable and confident is quite real.
The main thing is to understand what to work on first.


85954.

1. Understand your fears
The first step to gaining confidence is knowing what scares you in the process.
Often, shyness hides things like fear of judgment, fear of looking ridiculous or saying something inappropriate.
Try writing these alarms down on a piece of paper.
You will see that many of them seem frightening only in your head and have no real basis.


2. Use Self-Sustaining Internal Dialogue
Our inner voice is often prone to criticism: “I am not an interesting interlocutor”, “I have nothing to say”.
Try turning this installation over:
Say to yourself, “I can be interesting to others,” “My thoughts can be important and unique.”
Systematic change of a negative scenario to a positive one helps you feel confident in your own words and actions.




3. Work on body language
A confident posture, an open look and a friendly smile are not just details.
It's important signals that we send to others. If your shoulders are slouched and your eyes are down,
Even the most important words can sink into misperception. Watch your posture, keep your back straight,
The shoulders are relaxed and the hands are in a neutral or open position.
This will not only make a pleasant impression on the interlocutor, but also have a positive impact on your internal state.


4. Start with small steps.
If you want to feel free in big companies,
Start with simple things: talk to your housemate, have a friendly conversation in the store or in line.
Each such experience strengthens your faith in yourself and expands the circle of comfortable communication.
As small conversations become habitual, you’ll find you can support longer, deeper conversations.


5. Learn to listen.
A really good conversationalist is not someone who can endlessly tell interesting stories.
It's someone who can listen. Ask questions about the topic, and most importantly, show genuine interest.
People are drawn to those who delve into their thoughts and feelings.
The skill of listening not only brings you closer to the interlocutor, but also helps to avoid awkward pauses in conversation.


6. Practice public speaking
One quick way to get rid of social discomfort is to train in front of an audience.
Try to sign up for an oratory course or a debate club.
Yes, things may seem scary at first, but it’s these “challenges” that help push the boundaries.
Over time, you will notice that it becomes much easier to formulate thoughts and communicate them to the public.




7. Learn the Art of Compliments
The ability to make an appropriate and sincere compliment is a powerful tool in the social arsenal.
People love to be appreciated and seen by their best side. Learn to notice the cool details in the interlocutor:
Be it his style, ideas or professional achievements.
But remember: all compliments should be sincere and not look overly flattering.


8. Do not forget about rest and self-control
Excessive stress in trying to become “always open and always confident” can lead to the opposite result – burnout and frustration.
Give yourself the right to take a breather, engage in meditation or light exercise,
to relieve the accumulated tension. Take care of your psychological state - then it will be easier and more pleasant to communicate.


Remember, true confidence comes not from trying to adjust to someone else’s expectations, but from a deep understanding of your uniqueness.
Find your pace, your themes, in which you feel calm and interesting.
Over time, the ability to communicate freely will become an integral part of your life.
A discomfort in society will occur less and less.
After all, you are the main author of your story, and it is up to you to decide what colors to add to it.