The story of a mother who raised a selfish son, and now can not cope with him

Modern literature and modern psychologists tell us that egoism Be a successful person who only thinks about himself. Such behavior, in their opinion, will necessarily lead to wealth, fame and triumph. You need to be a predator, a shark, go to the intended goal and do not pity anyone in your path.



Glossy magazines are full of photos of such “alpha males” and promote this model of behavior. But in the real world, things are different. Selfishness in adulthood can become on their own only with great effort. A normal person will always show empathy. But to educate an egoist is a trifling matter. But where does it lead?

To have an only child when you are 38 years old and not pamper it is something on the verge of fiction. Ask any parent with late children, they will confirm. That’s probably how my instincts work, but my husband and I just couldn’t. Besides, we had a lot of attempts before and it ended badly. I don't even want to remember.

Already in kindergarten, teachers reproached us for the fact that Oleg was very spoiled. He wanted all the toys and didn’t want to share them with anyone. I tried to take someone’s stuff home and cried. It's not good enough, but it's just a kid. Even adults change over time. The kids are so old.



But at school, these signals kept coming. As parents, we tried to give our son the best. Therefore, they did not skimp on tutors, good clothes, pocket money and so on - everything that was needed. Oleg was a solid good man, but he was called to the director from time to time. He wasn't a fighter, no. But I could have ruined the lesson because of something small.

Classmate cheated on the test? There will be a scandal. The teacher gave a low grade? The lesson will not continue until this issue is resolved. And it was not about the assessments as such. A three would do him. But the fact that Oleg is infringed somewhere... That was unacceptable to him.

We had hoped that such displays of character would help him in his adult life. You need to be ambitious if you don't want to work in a factory all your life, right? But classmates thought otherwise, and Oleg often had to fight for his beliefs. Well, at least he didn't study these days. Now children are mostly softer and more loyal. And in the past, it would have been much more serious. Much!



Unfortunately, we failed to enter the Institute on a budget. The grades were too low, and the son would not have pulled the exams. Therefore, I had to tighten my belts and fork out on a paid basis. Not that it somehow motivates Oleg, but without education in the modern world nowhere. Unfortunately, after the third year he was kicked out. Failure and frequent absenteeism, and there was no possibility to agree.

My son didn't want to go to work. He tried some schemes on the Internet, but for this he had to invest some money. We didn't have any, and the bank refused to lend. In addition, six months later it turned out that all this soap bubble and, in the end, it burst, leaving many investors without a penny in their pocket.



Then Oleg tried himself in marketing. He traveled around the city and distributed booklets advertising a new Chinese product. This story did not last long, competitors recruited even more of the same guys, and ended with the fact that the product became so massive that it no longer brought profit. The agents were not even paid, and the founders of the “firm” simply disappeared from the radar.

Oleg became officially unemployed. We certainly didn’t show him anything. Where should a young man go in such a situation? He continued to live with us in our two-bedroom apartment. The only thing I feared was that he would start getting carried away by the computer, shut himself up and stop going outside. For a while it was, but then he met Mary.

Masha is a complicated person. She doesn't work anywhere either. He wears screaming makeup. But for Oleg, she is like an angel from heaven. As a mother, I like to think my son has a couple. But I understand that if these kids don't learn to survive in society, it will end up very, very sad. The problem is they both don’t want to change.



My husband, despite his age, continues to work and even has a part-time job. I also sometimes go to the office building near the house. It takes a minimum of time and effort, but always pay on time. When combined, it makes a good amount. But it still disappears when it comes time to buy food. And young people don't help us.

Maria has already moved her things to us. So we'll have her for a long time. I don’t mind, they’re always in their room. But it annoys me that a girl never even says hello. He won't ask how he's doing. Maybe take the bathroom all day and go rummaging in the fridge at night. It is clear that this attitude is formed because I do not know her very much. But it still causes negativity, understand me.

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My son says they are almost married. So my dad and I need to learn to see her as a family member. I haven't even seen her parents. Just friends. These bloodsuckers often come to us. Very noisy. I speak to them differently. I'm not holding myself back because I won't tolerate a mess in my house. But it's all negativity and irritation, too.

My husband and I decided that we would not be able to buy an apartment for our son. There's not enough money. If you take a mortgage, it is not known whether they will pay for it, even if we help with the down payment. You can't lose that kind of money. But young people need space, and we need peace. Perhaps we will be able to change our two-room apartment with a surcharge for two one-room.



Unfortunately, we see no other way out, but we have to live somehow. I hope my son takes his head before he becomes a father. We will no longer be able to support our grandson. And while everything is in limbo, it is only necessary to trust in the Lord and believe in the best.