I am 65 years old, I have raised three children, but now I feel completely unnecessary to any of them.

Life is full of surprises and surprises. Sometimes, even for a week or a month, it is impossible to make plans that will come true. What can we say about long-term plans, when a person seriously discusses how he will spend the next couple of decades, how he will meet old age?



Today's edition. "Site" She will share the story of a woman who planned to move to live with her children at retirement age. But it was much more complicated. And now our reader is confused. She has three children, but none of them is in a hurry to help her. It's like it's for them. junkie.

It is very bitter to feel that in old age you are not needed by anyone. I have two adult sons and a daughter. But they all have their own concerns. And I am not a native person for them, but just a burden, Elena complains.



“I was a widow at 33 with two young children. I couldn’t be alone for long and married again. It seemed that everything was getting better, gave birth to a son Vanya. But after 9 years there was a divorce.

“The youngest decided to stay with his father. I didn't mind. I knew my father could give him more than I could. I didn’t know how I would at least put my elders on my feet. But somehow we survived. The children grew up and went their own way. It seemed like everything was going to be okay. And in my old age I will be with my family, with my children and grandchildren.”



And then the problems began with the eldest son. He began to drink, quarrels with his daughter-in-law began. Then he started getting drunk more and more, and their family was cracking at the seams. She eventually kicked him out and he came back to me. Now he's out of work in my retirement, drinking and hanging out with the same crap as himself. No help, only shame and headache.”



“Daughter got married late, son-in-law brought us here. They live badly, and that's what she blames on me. It's my fault the four of us live under the same roof. It's the fault they fight all the time that they have nowhere to have children. The eldest son does not make claims, everything suits him. But he would have been better without me, too. Where should I go? ?



“Only Vanechka is doing well. He has long since left for Germany, settled there, earns a good living. I visited once a year and then stopped. He calls occasionally and has not been seen live in three years.”

“I have repeatedly told Vanya that we live here together closely. She said it would be good for me to move out of town or somewhere else. But he never replied intelligibly.”

“Of course I am not asking him to go to Germany. I don’t want to be a burden, and it’s scary to change something at 65. But I'm his mother. He could help me buy a little house where I could live out my years. From older children, help is no longer necessary, Elena laments.



I wish it had turned out like this. It seems that the eldest son and daughter of Elena have not become independent people, if they can not independently build their lives and give the retired mother so much trouble. It is hoped that the family will find some solution that will change the situation for the better.