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How a Rebenka Statement Affects Relationships
Love is sometimes blind. What women do to keep a man: go for plastic surgery, radically change the style or radically lose weight. Only not always these methods work, and even then many decide on the old, seemingly someone tested, method - trying to get pregnant. But is it worth it?
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Editorial "Site" I decided to find out whether trying to have a child will help to save the family and whether it should be done.
The idea of having a child to keep a husband in the family is not at all new. It was used by our grandmothers. But then she was more capable, because leaving the family was a shame. It's not a good move right now.
Women think, childbirth"And he can't go anywhere." First of all, think for yourself, having a baby can heat up a relationship even in a couple where everything was fine. It is unlikely that a baby who needs all your attention will help to mend the relationship between you. Not only did you have problems before, but new ones will be added.
A couple who were on the verge of breaking up, a child can be separated forever. This leads to a vicious circle, because you did not solve your problems, and then new worries were added. So if you think that a child will just erase all past grievances and problems, you are very mistaken.
The success rate of such a plan is terribly low. Yes, men often stay in the family, so as not to spoil their reputation, for example. One does not allow pride to leave, and the other - conscience, no one wants to become a scumbag who abandoned a pregnant wife. Although this does not work with all men. And you realize this is pure manipulation, don't you?
DepositPhotos
All right, let's say the man stays with you. And suppose you don't care if he's left out of pity or just because he's well-bred, not because of love. But then what? Building relationships on manipulation, turning a small defenseless creature into a weapon of war? This is what happens in most cases, because there is nothing else in this relationship.
And then another question arises, who will be better off: you with a baby in your arms, whom you gave birth simply to make a person be with you; a man who is with you out of a sense of duty; a child who, having barely been born, has already become a party to family conflicts? I'll assume no one's gonna be okay.
DepositPhotos
You can't keep your husband with a baby forever. And for the child will not be able to constantly create the illusion of a happy family. When he grows up and realizes that his parents are together because of him, there will be a collapse of values and complete disappointment. If you are constantly fighting with a child, it is unlikely to make him happy.
A child in this atmosphere will be nervous. Children’s mentality will inevitably suffer from constant conflicts. In addition, children learn from their parents, and you do not want the child to grow up and repeat the same model of relationships in marriage. As you can see, all options are not very rosy.
DepositPhotos Yes and always remains the option when the man just leaves. Then you're left alone with the child and start blaming him for all the troubles. You realize that nothing good comes of it. So maybe you shouldn't have a baby just to save the marriage?
If the relationship is not glued, then either try to fix it or separate. You can try to go to therapy, talk, establish relationships, there are always options. If nothing works, it’s best to just end the relationship, break up and become happy apart.
A child is not a glue, a weapon or a way to solve all problems. Children should not be raised for revenge, for manipulation or for the preservation of the family. A child should be born when you both want it, when you can provide him with a full and loving family. Children should have a happy childhood. That's what you need to understand.
DepositPhotos
There are many famous people who used this technique to keep their husband. Public people are a little more complicated, because they are always under the watchful eye of the press. The most striking example is Victoria Beckham. Many times the press began to write about the discord between David and Victoria, but soon stopped because there was a much more interesting news: Vicky's expecting a baby.
And so she did after almost every major scandal. Now the couple has four children, in which David does not like the soul. He adores his sons, is proud of them and cannot rejoice in little Harper. In 2015, after a major scandal, Victoria thought to give birth to another child. Yes, she manages to save her family in this way. But is it worth it?
It's up to you anyway. We made arguments and shared our views on this. The choice is yours, but always consider the fact that you decide not only for yourself, but also for your unborn child.
Sometimes it's better to just leave. Recently, we wrote about when to decide on a divorce and how to do it without unnecessary drama.
What to do if you already have a child in marriage? Earlier we talked about how to help a child survive the divorce of parents.
Would you take that step? Do you think you can do that? Tell us in the comments.
DepositPhotos
Editorial "Site" I decided to find out whether trying to have a child will help to save the family and whether it should be done.
The idea of having a child to keep a husband in the family is not at all new. It was used by our grandmothers. But then she was more capable, because leaving the family was a shame. It's not a good move right now.
Women think, childbirth"And he can't go anywhere." First of all, think for yourself, having a baby can heat up a relationship even in a couple where everything was fine. It is unlikely that a baby who needs all your attention will help to mend the relationship between you. Not only did you have problems before, but new ones will be added.
A couple who were on the verge of breaking up, a child can be separated forever. This leads to a vicious circle, because you did not solve your problems, and then new worries were added. So if you think that a child will just erase all past grievances and problems, you are very mistaken.
The success rate of such a plan is terribly low. Yes, men often stay in the family, so as not to spoil their reputation, for example. One does not allow pride to leave, and the other - conscience, no one wants to become a scumbag who abandoned a pregnant wife. Although this does not work with all men. And you realize this is pure manipulation, don't you?
DepositPhotos
All right, let's say the man stays with you. And suppose you don't care if he's left out of pity or just because he's well-bred, not because of love. But then what? Building relationships on manipulation, turning a small defenseless creature into a weapon of war? This is what happens in most cases, because there is nothing else in this relationship.
And then another question arises, who will be better off: you with a baby in your arms, whom you gave birth simply to make a person be with you; a man who is with you out of a sense of duty; a child who, having barely been born, has already become a party to family conflicts? I'll assume no one's gonna be okay.
DepositPhotos
You can't keep your husband with a baby forever. And for the child will not be able to constantly create the illusion of a happy family. When he grows up and realizes that his parents are together because of him, there will be a collapse of values and complete disappointment. If you are constantly fighting with a child, it is unlikely to make him happy.
A child in this atmosphere will be nervous. Children’s mentality will inevitably suffer from constant conflicts. In addition, children learn from their parents, and you do not want the child to grow up and repeat the same model of relationships in marriage. As you can see, all options are not very rosy.
DepositPhotos Yes and always remains the option when the man just leaves. Then you're left alone with the child and start blaming him for all the troubles. You realize that nothing good comes of it. So maybe you shouldn't have a baby just to save the marriage?
If the relationship is not glued, then either try to fix it or separate. You can try to go to therapy, talk, establish relationships, there are always options. If nothing works, it’s best to just end the relationship, break up and become happy apart.
A child is not a glue, a weapon or a way to solve all problems. Children should not be raised for revenge, for manipulation or for the preservation of the family. A child should be born when you both want it, when you can provide him with a full and loving family. Children should have a happy childhood. That's what you need to understand.
DepositPhotos
There are many famous people who used this technique to keep their husband. Public people are a little more complicated, because they are always under the watchful eye of the press. The most striking example is Victoria Beckham. Many times the press began to write about the discord between David and Victoria, but soon stopped because there was a much more interesting news: Vicky's expecting a baby.
And so she did after almost every major scandal. Now the couple has four children, in which David does not like the soul. He adores his sons, is proud of them and cannot rejoice in little Harper. In 2015, after a major scandal, Victoria thought to give birth to another child. Yes, she manages to save her family in this way. But is it worth it?
It's up to you anyway. We made arguments and shared our views on this. The choice is yours, but always consider the fact that you decide not only for yourself, but also for your unborn child.
Sometimes it's better to just leave. Recently, we wrote about when to decide on a divorce and how to do it without unnecessary drama.
What to do if you already have a child in marriage? Earlier we talked about how to help a child survive the divorce of parents.
Would you take that step? Do you think you can do that? Tell us in the comments.