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How to Deal With Shame
Under normal circumstances, shame helps regulate behavior. When you do something bad or out of common sense, you feel embarrassed and ashamed.
Many people suffer from shame too often. This feeling is more acute, which prevents them from feeling comfortable in any situation. Such people painfully perceive trouble, underestimate their self-esteem and in every way hide from the world.
So today's editorial office. "Site" will tell more about this problem feeling, explain the nature of its origin, and also tell, How to get rid of feelings of shameMake your life more interesting and fuller.
Shame is poisoning our lives, making us feel insignificant. A person is ashamed to make mistakes, ashamed to admit ignorance, ashamed to express emotions, ashamed to attract attention, ashamed to occupy a lot of space or time. It minimizes any activity in order to be less ashamed. And suffers even more.
In ancient times, the condemnation of others could even mean physical death. It seems to have been recorded at the genetic level. Especially in our country, where communism was built for a long time, suppressing all dissenters.
Today, many still depend on the opinions of others. The proverbial “what will people think” puts pressure on each of us. Some have learned to deal with this pressure, some have not.
DepositPhotos
There. shamefulness. It guards our principles, our moral standards. By moving away from them, we get remorse. And we're back. Without such support, it is easy to get lost and do stupid things. For example, a healthy sense of shame prevents us from walking naked on the street or defecating on the playground. Healthy shame is good.
But there is. toxicity. It eats away at our confidence, destroys our self-esteem, suppresses our emotions. Toxic shame makes us very susceptible to external influences. Other people’s opinions are more important to us than our own. We are losing our identity.
DepositPhotos
Steps to getting rid of toxic shame:
By being ashamed and defending ourselves against rejection, we deprive ourselves of acceptance. People around you may think you are a wonderful and talented person, but as long as you devalue their words, you will think otherwise. Toxic shame. It occurs in contact with other people, so in a relationship it must be destroyed. Just let yourself take risks.
DepositPhotos
Risk to believe that the words of approval and support in your address sincere. Take the risk of compliments not as flattery, but as recognition of their merits. Take the risk of relying on yourself when a new challenge arises. Every positive feedback will only convince you that you deserve more. shame It will melt every time.
Earlier, we talked in detail about the hidden complexes of men. And also found an interesting connection between the zodiac sign and childhood fear. It seems that at an early age all the fears that later poison our lives begin. What do you think?
Many people suffer from shame too often. This feeling is more acute, which prevents them from feeling comfortable in any situation. Such people painfully perceive trouble, underestimate their self-esteem and in every way hide from the world.
So today's editorial office. "Site" will tell more about this problem feeling, explain the nature of its origin, and also tell, How to get rid of feelings of shameMake your life more interesting and fuller.
Shame is poisoning our lives, making us feel insignificant. A person is ashamed to make mistakes, ashamed to admit ignorance, ashamed to express emotions, ashamed to attract attention, ashamed to occupy a lot of space or time. It minimizes any activity in order to be less ashamed. And suffers even more.
In ancient times, the condemnation of others could even mean physical death. It seems to have been recorded at the genetic level. Especially in our country, where communism was built for a long time, suppressing all dissenters.
Today, many still depend on the opinions of others. The proverbial “what will people think” puts pressure on each of us. Some have learned to deal with this pressure, some have not.
DepositPhotos
There. shamefulness. It guards our principles, our moral standards. By moving away from them, we get remorse. And we're back. Without such support, it is easy to get lost and do stupid things. For example, a healthy sense of shame prevents us from walking naked on the street or defecating on the playground. Healthy shame is good.
But there is. toxicity. It eats away at our confidence, destroys our self-esteem, suppresses our emotions. Toxic shame makes us very susceptible to external influences. Other people’s opinions are more important to us than our own. We are losing our identity.
DepositPhotos
Steps to getting rid of toxic shame:
- Detect toxic shame
If we are afraid to admit that shame interferes with our lives, we are doing ourselves a disservice. Shame is pushed into the unconscious and there has a destructive effect on us. If shame prevents you from living, eradicate it. - Accept.
Admit your mistakes and imperfections. Think of things that were fun, but made you feel ashamed. Discuss these situations in your head. What would have happened if you had no remorse? It's okay, isn't it?
DepositPhotos - A new emotional beacon
Imagine that you don’t know the sense of shame and relive the “shameful” life situations. How would you react now? Scroll it in your head and define a new pattern of behavior. - Self-control
Watch your emotions and notice behavior changes when they make you blush. Positive emotions will show you are moving in the right direction. By lowering your level of toxic shame, you open up new opportunities.
By being ashamed and defending ourselves against rejection, we deprive ourselves of acceptance. People around you may think you are a wonderful and talented person, but as long as you devalue their words, you will think otherwise. Toxic shame. It occurs in contact with other people, so in a relationship it must be destroyed. Just let yourself take risks.
DepositPhotos
Risk to believe that the words of approval and support in your address sincere. Take the risk of compliments not as flattery, but as recognition of their merits. Take the risk of relying on yourself when a new challenge arises. Every positive feedback will only convince you that you deserve more. shame It will melt every time.
Earlier, we talked in detail about the hidden complexes of men. And also found an interesting connection between the zodiac sign and childhood fear. It seems that at an early age all the fears that later poison our lives begin. What do you think?
