What should the son of a mother for what she bore him, gave birth and raised him? Bashny.Net

Adult children sometimes want to express their Thanks to parents for their education. Someone just supports relatives, someone helps financially. Not because you have to, but because you want to. However, there are cases when conflicts arise on this basis. For example, when parents demand something from their children under the pretext that they owe them. Whether this is correct and whether it is possible to solve such a problem peacefully, read further in the article.



In our editorial office came an unusual message from our subscriber Alla Sergeevna. She writes: 'I'm 64, my son just turned 44. He got married a few years ago and started living separately. We've been fighting a lot lately, although I don't understand why. Sometimes I call him to ask for help. To hang the shelf, to fix something else. But the son began to refuse, saying: “Just because you gave birth to me, does not mean that I will owe you all my life.” I'm very sorry.""

The reader is desperate: I don't understand why my son talks to me like that. The other day he told me to stop calling him. Maybe his wife is turning him against me. We used to live under the same roof for so many years. I do not know what to do or how to make contact with my son.”



Well, let's deal with this situation together. It is not clear in what tone the woman asks her son for help. Surely she is used to the fact that he is always there and ready to help her out at any time. He is 40 years old and has a family of his own.

Perhaps the son of Alla Sergeevna for many years lived in reproaches and just tired of it. Obviously, the woman is lonely. We don't know where her husband is, but it feels like he might have left his wife. The son became for the woman a rescue island that is always nearby. And when he moved, it became difficult for the heroine to cope with her life alone.



It is important to understand that the negative reaction of adult children is usually justified. No one is going to be rude to their mother out of the blue and quarrel with so many years together. By the way, this is also one of the possible reasons. We are convinced that living with parents, being already a mature person, is more harmful than good. This creates new problems and conflicts.

There are parents who literally demand attention from their grown children. And sometimes not only attention, but also money. There must be some kind of gratitude for education.



But should I? Do people have children just to end up caring for them, trying to pay for their lives? It sounds at least strange and ridiculous. All gratitude must come from the heart. It is foolish to demand from relatives anything: it is even more repulsive.

The birth of a child is a responsible decision for spouses. And his education is a great job. When children grow up, they start their own independent life, and this is a normal process. But sitting next to my mother’s skirt, being already a mature man, is simply wrong.



The son of Alla Sergeevna should not neglect his own happiness or banal comfort for the sake of his mother. Another thing is to talk about it directly and openly. If the mother puts pressure on the son, he should tell about it, otherwise in the future it will just worsen.

In any relationship, there is only one rule. Respect begets respect, love is the result of love. The negative can only be negative. So Alla Sergeyevna needs to understand why her son behaves in this way. Perhaps to correct this, you need to change something in yourself?



How do you think older children can express themselves? Thanks to parents for their education? Boldly share your thoughts in the comments!