Why the profession of a son-in-law is no longer important for creating a strong family Bashny.Net

Meet the groom Often the lottery and does not always go according to the previously planned plan. So, even if the daughter is completely delighted with the young man, the mother can always tell you how it will be better. Or can't she?



Our reader Irina had this situation. The only daughter is in love with a young man. It seems to have everything you need for happiness. Not really.

My only daughter is getting married, but my plans are to do everything to prevent this wedding. Don’t get me wrong, I am not a meger and wish my child only happiness. But believe me, it will be better for everyone.

I raised my daughter alone. We did not have anything serious with her father: we diverged and converged. They could not come to a common denominator. Believe me, it only looks funny in the movies. In fact, everyone suffered. When Mary arrived in her second year, we decided to separate. No offense or insult. Dad exhaled deeply and left for the last time.



Then he went to another country to work. But I admit, he is still a good man: until the age of 18, he gave his daughter money and gifts. A couple of times he even sent me something, even though he didn’t have to. At least I didn't ask for anything. But back to my situation.

So, Mashenka grew quickly and now she is moving to high school. Good academic performance, most of the subjects passed on "excellent". That's despite the fact that she never really sat at the textbooks. I just understood the essence of the subject and memorized the most important parts. I think that's the way to learn.

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Yes, there were boys chasing her, but that never really interested her. Movies, museums, and all her "romantic" trips after school, as far as I know. The same thing happened at the university. Few people really interested her. And on parties, parties and other “joys” of young people she somehow did not care. A couple of friends and walks around the city - this is the rest my girl loved most.

And so I began to notice a change in her character and behavior. If before it was mostly boredom and just the usual calm of a confident person, now I saw how Masha smiled every little thing, every little thing. She was happy even because she was at least annoyed.



“Butterflies in the stomach, no other way. I guess I fell in love, I thought, and I was right. A few weeks later, I saw them. They walked in a local park holding hands. The young man said something and they laughed. Good clothes and high height made a positive impression on me. Why not?

After telling my daughter about what I saw, I kind of asked for an informal meeting with a young man. Find out his name, who his parents are, etc. Nothing serious interested me. I got a lot more than I expected.



“Mama, his name is Kostya and we will get married. I'm glad you know, I'm feeling better. We thought and decided. I am not a little girl and I will not change my decision.

In principle, I supported Masha, so reluctantly (for the tick) agreed. But on the condition that I come to meet his parents, because they are not strangers.



Then there was the nightmare. I came by taxi, with flowers, to the outskirts of the city. Everyone was waiting for me. Panel house, two-bedroom apartment, though clean, but with repairs from the past. Some results of an amateur needlewoman were hung on the furniture (as I later realized, it was the work of Constantine’s mother).

There was a carpet on the wall, you know? Yeah, yeah, like the '90s. The neighbors kept making noise behind the wall. As I understand it, an attack of sudden evening repairs. We've had this before. But in brick houses, the sound of a punch is not so heard. And educated people stop all work up to 5-6 hours.

My "future" relatives are a cartoon couple. A thin tall woman with sunken eyes and a nervous smile and her husband is a smug, short fat man with a lush mustache. He was constantly joking or quoting some nonsense, no one knows where he read it. Well, that's okay. The worst thing I learned later. It turned out that Constantine and his father worked as a plumber. They're partners, employees. And the young man is 29 years old!



Do you understand the whole prospect of marriage? Moneylessness, despondency and a complete nightmare in a relationship. I can't wish that on my daughter. After sitting for a while longer and listening to the strange stream of thoughts that this family threw at me, I was going home. In the corridor, Masha stopped me and, seeing the tears frozen in my eyes, asked me to talk about it at home, in the evening of the same day.

The conversation was not in high tones, but I still broke down. We'll be married even if I don't come. She is not interested in how her fiancé earns, they will succeed. His job, you see, is promising, I just don't understand. I would be ashamed to invite a friend. You know what “furchet” they are waiting for there for the home kitchen and songs of some Serdyuchka.



I don't know what to do. I fully understand what youth is and that my daughter is not going to make any compromises. But I raised her alone and I know that such a union can not lead to anything good. Perhaps there is someone here who can give me advice on how to influence the stubbornness of his own daughter. I don't know, it can't let me go because the wedding is only a couple of months away. Thank you so much for reading.