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Nurturing the child: the road HOME
This incident occurred when her daughter was little more than a year. Since baby, never favor any slings (for stiffness) or the stroller (the distance from my mom), started to go — she began to ignore any vehicle. For a walk had to take the entire set of accessories and juggle them – maybe something will work at least for 10 minutes.
That evening we walked from guests overexcited child never agreed to the sling or the stroller, or even on the handle. And we walked...
All the hours that we overcame the distance that an adult can pass in 15 minutes, I thought about how this is our Odyssey is reminiscent of the process of nurturing the child.
Instead of going to vigorous step by the shortest way, you are forced to trudge at a snail's pace,constantly deviates to one or the other direction relative to the route, stopping on the way back. It seems that you never get to the end of the road where you can relax. Often, losing patience, I want to drag the child to the goal by force, let it cry and rests, the accomplishment.But in this case, instead of getting to your destination tired but satisfied from the done way the child will be broken and disappointed that he was not allowed to go this way myself, and the parent will be nervous from the “terrible behavior” “ungrateful” offspring.
And how many times in this way will help the child to rise after an unsuccessful step, to comfort him, if filled bumps; to stop, to protect from danger; even to bear because he was tired, and again brought down to earth because he wants to continue. Might have to listen to the comments of strangers about a spoiled or excessive independence of the child.
Adult on this route is both simpler and harder. Easier because he knows where to go and what to expect along the way. Harder because, no matter how desirable, this way will not collapse, “to cut off” distance does not work, you need to help your child go through it from beginning to end.
Child: harder, and easier.
Harder, because he doesn't know where they're going and what to expect. Easier, because the ultimate goal of the way of his interests a little, it goes for process.
It's more important to gain in this way their own experience than to listen to parent comments: “the Stone is dirty, don't touch”, “just Think, a bug – nothing interesting.”
And that's the way the road leads us to understand the key points of alpha parenting: how much freedom we've given to a child on the path to growing up, the leading role must still remain for adults.
We don't quite trust a little child to lead us home (literally, not figuratively) if you don't want to get lost, because for him it is overwhelming responsibility. Therefore, similarly it is unwise to allow the child to lead us on the way of his nurturing and upbringing.
Yes, in real life there are situation when you really have to drag myself to somewhere abutting the child because it is really necessary. But on this metaphorical road to adulthood we can show more attention, sensitivity and empathy for what a child needs, even if it appears to us that it is neither the time nor the energy. Happy journey! published
Author: Irina Gift
Source: alpha-parenting.ru/2014/05/15/vzrashhivanie-rebenka-doroga-domoy/
That evening we walked from guests overexcited child never agreed to the sling or the stroller, or even on the handle. And we walked...
All the hours that we overcame the distance that an adult can pass in 15 minutes, I thought about how this is our Odyssey is reminiscent of the process of nurturing the child.
Instead of going to vigorous step by the shortest way, you are forced to trudge at a snail's pace,constantly deviates to one or the other direction relative to the route, stopping on the way back. It seems that you never get to the end of the road where you can relax. Often, losing patience, I want to drag the child to the goal by force, let it cry and rests, the accomplishment.But in this case, instead of getting to your destination tired but satisfied from the done way the child will be broken and disappointed that he was not allowed to go this way myself, and the parent will be nervous from the “terrible behavior” “ungrateful” offspring.
And how many times in this way will help the child to rise after an unsuccessful step, to comfort him, if filled bumps; to stop, to protect from danger; even to bear because he was tired, and again brought down to earth because he wants to continue. Might have to listen to the comments of strangers about a spoiled or excessive independence of the child.
Adult on this route is both simpler and harder. Easier because he knows where to go and what to expect along the way. Harder because, no matter how desirable, this way will not collapse, “to cut off” distance does not work, you need to help your child go through it from beginning to end.
Child: harder, and easier.
Harder, because he doesn't know where they're going and what to expect. Easier, because the ultimate goal of the way of his interests a little, it goes for process.
It's more important to gain in this way their own experience than to listen to parent comments: “the Stone is dirty, don't touch”, “just Think, a bug – nothing interesting.”
And that's the way the road leads us to understand the key points of alpha parenting: how much freedom we've given to a child on the path to growing up, the leading role must still remain for adults.
We don't quite trust a little child to lead us home (literally, not figuratively) if you don't want to get lost, because for him it is overwhelming responsibility. Therefore, similarly it is unwise to allow the child to lead us on the way of his nurturing and upbringing.
Yes, in real life there are situation when you really have to drag myself to somewhere abutting the child because it is really necessary. But on this metaphorical road to adulthood we can show more attention, sensitivity and empathy for what a child needs, even if it appears to us that it is neither the time nor the energy. Happy journey! published
Author: Irina Gift
Source: alpha-parenting.ru/2014/05/15/vzrashhivanie-rebenka-doroga-domoy/