Found the formula of the perfect refusal Bashny.Net

The researchers investigated the behavior of students in groups, namely, their use of a variety of rejection techniques and studied the feedback of those who made requests. As a result, the most effective and painless form of communication for a denied request was derived, which was called the “communicative pie”. The technology lies in the conclusion of a bitter “stuffing” – a rejection between two “layers” of positive statements. Thus, the ideal rejection consists of three main parts: a judgment containing a positive assessment of the personality of your interlocutor, your relationship with him or her.

Negative answer: your refusal, supported by one or more objective reasons;

Your attitude towards the interlocutor, the hope for a successful resolution of the situation or the forecast that in the future you will certainly be able to help him.

The researchers investigated the behavior of students in groups, namely, their use of a variety of rejection techniques and studied the feedback of those who made requests. As a result, the most effective and painless form of communication for a denied request was derived, which was called the “communicative pie”.



The technology lies in the conclusion of a bitter “stuffing” – a rejection between two “layers” of positive statements. Thus, the ideal failure consists of three main parts:

This communicative formula has a really high efficiency, because it is based on the laws of human perception: we most emotionally react and better remember the beginning and end of communication (conversation, lectures, presentations). The content of the middle part is quickly erased from memory and emotionally “lubricated”. Thus, your “no” will be perceived calmly and without bright negative reactions – especially if you support it with a statement of objective reasons.

The application of the above technology makes it easier to refuse to the one we refuse.

Source: estet-portal.com