Time management for busy parents Bashny.Net

Time is a complex category. Physicists are still arguing whether it is objective or subjective. And if we think, in some moments, five minutes becomes an eternity, and in some of these five minutes pass so fast that we cannot even detect them. Modern life is arranged in such a way that we have no way to think about this: we are born, quickly get into kindergarten, school, College, go out to work. The mode in which we exist is defined by external forces, we are not able to manage time.

First, we set the mode of the parent or a kindergarten, then we come to a school where there is a forty-minute lessons and breaks, and after-school activity, again run by parents. Then we go to College and get a job where the same thing happens. And very often — especially women — the first time we are faced with time only after birth. When a child is born, we're alone in our apartment, and time fills the entire space. I have a hypothesis: young mothers in a hurry to run away from home back to work because they have their first encounter with time, and at this point it appears that they have no skills to deal with it.





 

When you start to take the first steps related to the planning, it is important to understand what you people. There is a typology in which people are divided into organized, able to this space to understand, and the so-called chaoticom who are characterized by creative mess. These people are very different, and the tools of time management and life should be different.

Some have a predisposition to planning due to childhood experiences, they are more Executive, but there are people more spontaneous and less prone to this. However, what kind of person you were before the baby is born, you have to review the tools of planning and control: need something to give, something to add, and combine different types of activity.

 

Self-control will Power arises in that moment when we experience internal conflict when we want to and parallel to one another. Depending on how "beefy" the power of the will, we can either cope or not cope with some temptation. Three years ago I was doing research, meeting with people who considered themselves to be strong-willed, and people who considered themselves, on the contrary, weak-willed.

I talked to them in a specific pattern, figuring out some patterns, the features associated with this concept. As a result, I came to the conclusion thatmost people believe that willpower is something that is born, and in the extreme case that is formed in childhood. Either you were born strong-willed (for example, I decided to quit Smoking and quit), or you're out of luck (as a child you do not support parents, but because you grow up weak-willed).

I spent about 60 interviews, and in 80% of cases people said that way: "this Not me" or something like "My dad made me squat a hundred times, and thanks to dad I now like this". Fortunately for many of us, modern research disproves these stereotypes. In fact, willpower can be improved through training, even in adulthood. If you know what to do, it is possible to cope with all sorts of temptations, and to organize their time in such a way as to achieve more at the same cost of effort, time and energy.

In addition to that will power trains, it is still consumed throughout the day on the mouth of many Western scholars. In the Russian practice it is known to a lesser degree: we have willpower, and in General these concepts are only interested in within sport psychology, that is when you need to grow the athlete. At the household level, about the will there is little information, basically all sources — conversion. We may have this problem are interested in to a lesser extent, the power associated with this bias.

 

Disease and stress to understand how to manage willpower, enough to know a few facts. Force of will is influenced, first, a chronic disease and, second, a stressful situation. If suddenly at the moment of time there is a stressful event, or suddenly you have developed a chronic disease, in this situation, a very large reserve of energy expended in overcoming this situation.

For example, if I am in the process of divorce is very difficult for me to do something in parallel. So you need to consider that you or your loved one may be ill, and therefore not to plan everything for a certain time and not to expect that you will have plenty of internal resources to seriously change your life. In this situation you need to treat yourself gently and understand that, unfortunately, miracles do not happen, and if something robs you of energy, then with high probability to spend it on something more effective in a given period of time will not work.

 

Sleep is the Best way to increase the available reserve is to perform three simple elementary things, namely: sleep, eat well, and exercise. I think this is a feature of the Russian mentality — to think that, despite the fact that our body badly, we ate little, slept badly and very long since I've done Hiking, we all can overcome.

Yes, to a certain point, we, of course, cope with it and overcome. But at some point the body will say stop. It gets sick, or otherwise break. To avoid this, we must first good night's sleep. The average person needs to sleep eight hours, but we all have different body chemistry and you need to focus on yourself. Usually less than six hours is not enough, although there are exceptions.

They say that Napoleon slept four hours, and Salvador Dali did it slyly, slept, then woke, then slept again. However, these six hours — minimum level, and better if this time more. Redistribution and imbalance happen if you lack of sleep, and consequently, your body needs more glucose. The increase in the consumption of glucose leads to very diverse consequences. Relate this to your experience: is not sleep, and upon awakening immediately want sweet.

The brain is the most energy consuming organ in our body that uses the greatest amount of glucose that enters the bloodstream together with meals. Accordingly, if we didn't get enough sleep, most of the glucose goes to the other reserves: first, we start to eat more sweets, and it often ends up not very good. Second, glucose is still not enough, why first of all suffers from the youngest part of our brain, i.e. the prefrontal cortex, which lacks energy.At a time when we are experiencing a long period of chronic lack of sleep, do not expect that you will be able to be efficient, to plan their lives, to become more productive.

 

Physical activity Sport in our lives is very important. I mean regular morning load. Now a lot of different "challenges" that run in social networks. For example, do 20 squats a day for a month or every evening walking briskly. Important such simple things. In any case it is impossible to set goals from the category of "now I'm an hour and a half to engage in the program Cindy Crawford". It doesn't work, because once you do, you will hang the child, and it's all over in 20 minutes, and more you will never return. Find yourself some exercise and do it at least five minutes a day for a month. After this period you certainly will turn into supervoltage and productive person, but you will notice changes in yourself that will motivate you to change further and become more responsible to himself.

Apart from the fact that the sport is coached by everyday stress, it also flushes out stress hormones, which undermine our health. It is now believed that the best sports daily load for people who are not engaged in professional sport, is walking. If you select 30 minutes in the evening for a walk and do it regularly, life will become much nicer.

 

"Monday I quit Smoking..." Very often, one effort entails concessions. For example, you ran, came home and ate a doughnut. If you count from the point of view of calories, the calories in the doughnut that you ate, and how much you ran, it was possible not to run and just sit and eat it. This happens not consciously, but unconsciously. Things you need to know: if you find yourself caught in this desire, you will be able to stop myself or say to yourself, "Not now, later!" and to give a ten minute delay. It is a simple technique that works very well with your brain.

If you want to abandon some bad habit, our brains are a very afraid of everything that cannot be changed. "Monday I quit Smoking and will never smoke, instead of two packs a day I smoke one before that Monday," and Monday, of course, nothing happens.

Much better if you want something to give, saying to herself, "Now, ten minutes of respite, I now will go to smoke, and in ten minutes." This usually works very well, the desire disappears in a minute. Worth a minute to go, and then it becomes easier. And another trap of the brain: we believe that tomorrow we will be others. We think that "now I eat dessert and a Monday stop". We spoken, we begin to believe and get fooled over and over again. If you do not make extra efforts, all our good intentions will remain good intentions. I think each of us has a bunch of examples of how we wanted to be different and what came of it.

 

Self-criticism

There is another feature of the Russian mentality. If from childhood, we are quite critical of himself and other children, we think that if we point out mistakes to myself and our children, then it will turn out something good. In fact it is not.

Self-criticism — due to the fact of how our brains undermine self-control. Many people have experienced this feeling when I was trying to do something different, and then still broke. For example, people who lose weight, are often frustrated. "I held on, held on, held on, and now suddenly ate the pie". One pie should be the second, then another and another. After the first pie, it was fine, because no one has died from one pie. But once you've worked up, decided that "I can't do this", and motioned with her hand, the terrible was not one of the cakes, and those ten conditional pies that were then. It's hard, but if you remember this and work in this direction, then at some point begins to happen. I must say to myself: "One pie — one pie" — not concentrating on it attention, and to continue on the chosen path.

 

Chronotype many people Have the concept of chronotype: people-larks, people, owls, people, pigeons. According to research, thirty percent of people — larks. They get up early in the morning, their productivity is higher than in other times of the day. Thirty percent — owls, which form the later the better; it is the people who in the morning generally do not see, do not hear, they need to drink ten cups of coffee to recover, and the most productive time for them is the night period. And the best part is the people who can be and larks, and owls, depending on how organized their lives.

Therefore,it is important to know the periods of highest productivity during the day to plan at this time, the most complex tasks that require the greatest resource of the brain, and in accordance with these data thus try to organize his regime during the day to this time was free for the important tasks. It is important to take this time nothing else but to work, and, consequently, more time to plan some other things.

 

The number of Miller Very often, when we try to change something in your life, we want to change everything at once, "start a new life." Like "I want to start to play sports and simultaneously lose weight, spend more time with the child." The brain has one interesting feature, which was called "Miller's magic number". The magic number of Miller in the original reads as 7 ± 2, but now our ability to memorize and the ability to manage different projects in the broad sense of the word has decreased because of the fact that the amount of white noise around greatly increased.

What happened to the information in the 50-ies, when the number of Miller opened? C 50-ies up to the present time the volume of information has increased tenfold, if not more. White noise is information, which we deliberately do not consume, but it exists all around us. It is possible to carry TV, commercials, people talking around us, Newspapers, magazines.

Despite the increasing amount of noise, our ability to remember and process information has not changed — and may even have decreased due to the fact that it's been hard with this amount of information necessary. Our brain is not changing so quickly, it was formed millions of years and evolutionary adapts very slowly. So, if you want to change something, it is better to act consistently took up the challenge, drove her to the end, recorded, took up something else. A maximum of three tasks. For example, you have a child, and you devote a lot of time, and the more children you have, the less available the resource remains in some other things.

And that's why a mother is work. If classes with the child, quarrels with her husband and problems at work takes a lot of energy, expect their forces, keeping in mind the number three. No need to plan what you will also begin to play sports or be to lose weight. Plan one thing, for example, that would be every morning for five minutes to squat 20 times, or to download the press 40 times during the month. When you do, look at what has changed and only then plan something else.

 

The sequence When you move consecutively, the probability of success is greatly increased. Many people have morning productive evening. One can imagine a bag, to put your will power and start to spend during the day on different things — for example, children who require a lot of will. You somewhere yourself bit and not yelled at the child, where it required a lot of time during cooking.

Why do most failures happen in the evening? Why we eat tonight, why do we in the evening often more emotionally unrestrained, why most of the fights happening in the evening? Because the bag with a force of will to evening is empty, we have no available reserve, we have nowhere to take resources to sustain itself and to better manage themselves.If you want to introduce something new into your life and make decisions, plan for it better in the morning because in the morning you are more productive.

 

Writing to Write is a very important skill of planning, which we often neglected, as it seems to us that we all remembered, and then it turns out that we planned to do three things at one time. Writing is a key technical skill that greatly helps to increase productivity, helps to implement some healthy habits related to planning time. Not only plan, but also write down and do revision. Recorded some tasks made the task list — sit down in the evening and see what you have done and what is not. Planning for planning, no need, no need to write lists and never to them not to look. If you started to write something in the evening, check the results at the end of the week, because otherwise it does not make sense.

 

Simple tasks to Perform simple operations that require up to three minutes — an important skill. If you know that there is some task that will take little time will solve it immediately. For example, you work, the child comes to you and asks you: "Read me a book!" And very often it turns out that I'm starting to explain to my son that I can't because I need to finish his business, the child begins to whine, hanging on the foot, and in the end, I can't finish the job. I want to be consistent so as not to look bad in the eyes of a child and in his own eyes, in the end, I spend much more time and effort. I have repeatedly verified that if I sat down and read him this book for five to seven minutes, then he would leave me alone and let me finish what needed to be done.

It is important to stop yourself, and some things are best done immediately, and then return to something more long lasting, than to attempt this task to be postponed. If there is a child very often his request should not be delayed. published

Author: Pauline Rychlov

 

P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©

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Source: theoryandpractice.ru/posts/11891-polina_rychalova