"As I crossed the US"

"In England all drunk, and in America - Relaxed»

Details about this trip, as well as the Grand Canyon, New Orleans, Death Valley and Coachella music festival, read this article.

Principle ticketing

Sitting listening to music: "Damn, great group, it is necessary to look at the route, where they play music." Moscow - no. And where it is? You look - Stockholm. Well, for example. Buy tickets - and everything must go. So I went to the Queens of the Stone Age to Cologne for Tame Impala in Stockholm on Godspeed You! Black Emperor in Milan, Amsterdam on Mars Volta, London in CSS, in Austin at the Trail of Dead. Somewhere else it was naturally. Italian football I also like very much, am a fan of "Juventus" and traveled to Rome for their match. This should be done much in advance, I'm less than a month, I do not plan - an average of six months, then the tickets are cheaper. You can plan in the fall, where to go for holidays in May.

It seems to me the perfect way to - to go it alone: ​​you can afford to break very quickly, and if going to a big company, it is very much necessary to arrive just in time to date, to prepare, to save money. I usually just buy the following pulse.


During a trip to Coachella, I spent thousands on all 100, including tickets and the festival. The main expense - housing. On average, $ 50-60 for two in a motel - they are the same everywhere. Between the first and the second trip, I read a book by Ilf and Petrov - a lot left as they describe, although it was influenced by the modern world. Wherever you spit, you will find a pharmacy, which is water, snacks, you'll be able to pay for the phone. You will lie on the same bed on which lay in the neighboring state three days ago. Cockroaches, mice, there was no mold. All standard - that's the beauty.

San Diego: training in the Coachella

In San Diego, I met up with her friend Masha, who lives in Miami. We bought all sorts of blankets, foam, a tent, because last year the tent melted. I still bought in England at the festival - there is rain, cold, all buhie, mud boots, all the yelling. Some crazy happens: your tent at night a drunk man falls, gets up and starts yelling Oasis. Only if England are mainly people live in tents, camping here - it is a large parking lot in the field: machine, and standing next to the tent. I put the tent and went to the very territory of the festival to listen to music, hang out. In the evening, I come - a tent the whole curve. I thought: "Maybe someone came, pulled the pegs." But it turned out, the day fries +40 ° C, and melted plastic support under tension caved. I had to buy new.

Procuring went to WalMart. Life hacking is that WalMart - it's too big a network, and in principle they not care at all. In this tent, we slept five nights at the festival and in the canyon, I spilled beer on it. Then he packed up back in the cardboard package and the words "I do not fit, my legs are too long," returned to the tent, blankets, anything else. Useful knowledge.

There is a chain of restaurants with crabs, where you're talking to the waitress: "I want you to be danced" - and they dance. Mary jumped up, too, began to dance. There's beauty, embankments, very cool - I was there to run about, and it certainly will not run in Marino, other sensations. People on the street a bit, because it's hot. In all the cities in the north-west of a climate and a dead city. People sit in pools at home under the air conditioner. And do not go anywhere.

"In America, everything is standard: you will lie on the same bed on which lay in the neighboring state three days ago. That's the beauty ».


360 days a year, this is an ordinary town, there is nothing interesting. And these are two of the weekend - just Shiz. There comes many people in this field - it is generally for the Polo.

They lose their unreal amount of phone, keys, credit cards, cameras. They annually spread on Facebook the list of lost and found, and look: there and iPhones, and "Nokii" and cameras, false teeth, glasses, caps. On the morning of the first day, we went to play dodzhbol - it's like bouncers, two teams, and the number of participants - the number of goals they put them. And three goals and three members, the balls are in the center, the participants run to them and they start to knock down who is the last - the winner.

You can have fun and before the festival, and then, even without going to the territory of the festival. Free internet, yoga in the morning, the giant queue for the shower.

There I met with the farmers - they have some kind of community. As our Lavka, once they give up all devices. Living at the farm on the fact that they produce. Really hippie. Girls with obodochkami, pigtails, children with huge eyes. They say they gave up everything, how should change consumption. You know that their efforts, of course, ridiculous, compared to the harm caused by the East, where everything is thrown into the river and not steamed, but did not want to disappoint them this fact. They're great. In general, all open, the atmosphere is cool. All Nakuru. You stand in front of the stage, and someone is close, smoke, and then sends back.

Masha and covered the six scenes, but I was not in two, but it rarely has the other four. Americans sluggish side impact, the same English - crazy. They immediately roar, shout, sing. Last year, when we played at Coachella Arctic Monkeys, are all, I look and there is a small crowd with the British flag - these are my guys. "Dude, you're from England?" - "Yes, we're from England." - "Come together: Arctic Monkeys!» But in general it is a very relaxed festival. Of course, there are sometimes emotional speech or superenergichnye. Last year, all under Madness ugorayu, some dance staged. You run, there is such a crazy slam - glasses flew off cap. You think, 'To hell with them! "Slam finishes to suit you:" Here are your glasses, here's your cap. " Dude lost his phone, and there immediately picked up the phone: "Whose phone?" I think everyone understands why they came, what they were doing.

The road to Death Valley

In Death Valley, the climate: the day it is very hot and the wind, and at night the temperature drops to zero. Stones freeze at night, and formed an icy crust that melts in the morning, making the stone begins to crawl on the ice pillow - called creeping stones. I madly wanted to look at it. But it did not work because the machine: he had to go ten miles through the desert, it is very hot and did not catch the phone. About to go on foot, all of question: is the history of how man once mathematically calculated that at a certain weight on such and such a distance Death Valley need so much water. He took so much water has gone. Whether ten, or 15 kilometers of walking - it is very hot, dehydration is very fast. He did not reach half a kilometer, and died from dehydration. We have long thought and have decided that we should not try to perform the feat.

Death Valley

At the entrance to the Valley is a hotel. I read that a woman in the early twentieth century, bought the building is destroyed and rebuilt it into a hotel and a concert hall. There began to come Louis Armstrong, BB King - all the legends of the time. They played Frank Sinatra. Place of worship, a place of jazz, blues. There everything is closed and it looks like all deserted - like a broken museum and next refill.

Death Valley itself is not very big - it can be a couple of days to travel all over the whole, but there are so many things. Earlier in Death Valley was a telephone booth; It could be from a different location of the booth to dial a number and make a call. If someone was nearby, he picked up the receiver. It was kind of like to call anywhere. And you can talk to the man in the desert. There is always something broke off and took with them; the service was so expensive that the telephone company thought that it would be better to remove the machine. The film "Phone Booth" is inspired by precisely this phenomenon.

Death Valley is located 80 meters below sea level. And the climate there is very strange. This is a great salt-box - there's nothing there, it's hot, the air heavy. Despite the fact that the place is tourism, people almost none. In the midst of this "Sea" is a great hotel. It laid a good way. There are coyotes and other animals. While this happens in a fairly large city, for example, when we returned back to Masha from the Hollywood hills, on the road there were two coyotes. Masha they are very afraid, so I told her that it was a dog. They looked at us and just barely dragged track.

In the Valley, we decided to break camp. Putting a tent is not easy - there is such a stone ground that I could not drive a peg. And the wind stronger: someone next door blew off the tent. It began hurricane. People jump, going all the shakes. I give up: it is necessary to look for a place for the night. We are on the GPS-navigator scored the nearest place where you can stay. It is 50 miles - have to go.

Las Vegas

We decided to stay on the Strip - a boulevard where all the casino hotels in general, the whole life. In America, you can not drink on the streets - there you can drink. In America, you can not smoke in the rooms - there is smoking allowed. This is the place where all the sins available. There are half-naked girls, luring you into a casino, sit some people with cards - playing the game. Mary arranged for us to raise the level of free rooms - we were given a room overlooking the Startek Casino Bellagio.

After the tent, after three days in the wilderness, when you're three hours a shower was finally going to the steep bar. We dressed up, drank. When you play, you give the free alcohol. I took a beer, Masha - any cocktail. We have tried to deal with machine guns: the charge ten dollars to much not to lose. Let's go to another, with Superman. They took another beer. And then it began. I do not even understand what happened - there is some kind of bonus. We went with five - and there is already $ 26, then 65. As a result, we reached $ 70, took 60 dollars. And I was like, "Stop! We won 60 bucks at the casino, go guzzle them. " And on the same evening at the bar all drunk Vesper - the only bar where the bartender did not care.

Vegas - disgusting place in actual fact. There are beggars everywhere, black guys, popping a CD. I realized that this was the perfect solution - spend the night, get drunk, play in a casino, pack up and leave. A terrible place to Vegas, I will not go ever.

Grand Canyon

I love the Grand Canyon. There are no words to describe it. The essence of all the parks in the United States that there is a lot on your responsibility: it can be deadly, but no you will not walk. You have to himself. Everywhere there are caveats: take water, take the food, do not do it. But no one is watching over you.

At the entrance stands a box - say, the entrance fee. We have paid. Take bukletik, read the rules, go to the water. Grand Canyon 400 kilometers in length. There are trails for hiking, many trails - many are at the very edge, and two or three lead directly to the river. Depth - 1, 6 km. It is understood that not so easy later. Last year, we were able in one day to reach only up to the plateau. It has an edge, you go down - a plateau, you go down below - the river. Next - great elevation changes, large load, large drop up and down the body ofigevaet. If you go down, then spend the night at the bottom - that's all we have considered.

This year was the rain. Down - load decent. You walk with a backpack. I was carrying five liters of water, Masha - two liters. Even some bananas, snacks, a sleeping bag, tent, sweatshirt. With this backpack go down. Behind kilogram ten, ten miles down. About nine hours of walking speed. And the last four kilometers, we were alone, the people in general no one. Masha done. It is difficult sometimes to find the person who first goes to the festival, and then a wheelbarrow back and forth and then in the Canyon.

There's a bunch of squirrels, which are considered the most dangerous animals in the Grand Canyon, because they carry the plague. We saw a deer. From below, it looks completely different, you know: to get up there you have to walk 16 kilometers. We descended from the southern region, as camping at the bottom of the northern region, there is a bridge Bright Angel. He is old, it has a pipe for its water comes in four states - Utah, Arizona, California and Nevada. It runs the cleaning power. We went to see what was going on back - a backpack covered in holes. This protein and immediately felt zhrachku gnawed Masha backpack that we do not put into WalMart, naturally. Then we went to watch as the sun sets. I get stuck on the river, the bridge, beauty.

There's always something rustling. You think: "Damn, where am I?" I got into the Grand Canyon, drank beer, and lay on the bridge. Going up - this is hell. There is a formula. Apparently, those who live in a bungalow, and lazy ride on mules, there is no self-examination. A lot of older people, 70 years old. They descend on the two days. But last year there were more people in the low season this year, also in April, camping was not fully packed. In the morning we were awakened by a ranger, "Dude, where your permission?» - In the end we were fined 70 dollars. With justice everything clearly. Up we went a different path, one guy advised us to go for the path of mules, it is shorter, but more difficult - there are large steps, steep slope. We went for 4, 5 hours. It was very hard.

Navajo Indian Reservation

On the road to Monument Valley Navajo standing along the road selling their jewelry, make grill. We stopped at some Indians who made barbecue - have decided to buy a burger and ribs. Disgusting was the taste, but bought from the Indians. They contemptuously refer to all such we Navajo, and you come to our land. Americans believe that the Indians a little brazen: they do not pay taxes, they have the financial concessions and subsidies, they are surly, lazy and sloppy. These reservations do not have homes, they live in caravans, huts collapsed in machines - in general, similar to the large repair shops.

Monument Valley, which is located on the territory of the Indians - a former Gulf of Mexico when the glaciers melted, the sands washed out, and it remains unclear Education. These things look very impressive. In the valley there is a territory where the most interesting thing - arches, rock paintings, and there can be only with the Indians there. We came up: "How much will you go?" - They are twisted 180 dollars. We have so many were not. There's a lazy man sitting alone, but found the strength to get up. And he said: "Dude, let me take you for 120'll take two." We agreed.

They sat in his pickup - here you can still ride on simple wheelbarrows. Next on the reservation every rock has a name: Ladoshki, Eye of the sky, the wind ear, finger, sleeping man. We went to the place where we were alone. He stopped and did not hurry. The friendly was, he liked me. Feeling as if on Mars, it looks funny. In general, 120 bucks is not given in vain.

New Orleans

The next day we were leaving in the morning. Mary returned to her in Miami, and I went to New Orleans. This is a special part of America, which used to be very French, the eastern part of Canada. The relatively large city - there is a skyscraper, business center, and there is the French Quarter. It is very different in architecture - small huts with balconies. There are a lot of jazz, all play on the street, where the Mississippi, all eat fish, crabs, shrimp. New Orleans is famous for the fact that they drink absinthe. I met a girl, and there we drank absinthe in the hour of the day, polished Bloody Mary, then ate crayfish.

New Orleans is considered criminal city, because there are a lot of black. The city has not yet recovered from Hurricane Katrina, some houses collapsed, they were abandoned and left. The French Quarter at night turns into a binge - seven days a week. You can drink in the streets, smoking in schools. I met a guy at the bus stop, it all my life was nowhere, and his previous three generations never had. He says to me: I like you, be careful. He said that he can deceive the money on phones. He has a great trick: take ten, change it for a dollar, and you put all the pocket. The rest of you put into the boot. He saved it several times. You stop, start something to rub aggressively, they say, drive headstock. You took out a ten dollar papers, toss them and immediately run away.

The first day we hung out a new girl friend, then flew her friends. And the second day I just walked around the city, went to different places. It began to rain, I went to some bar, sat down at the bar, was the English football championship, I took a beer. Behind the counter sat an elderly black, gray, drinking beer. He turned to me and stared. I look back. He sat close, and we had a long conversation.

They have a very interesting accent - a bloated and fast, this is not Texas, where they were minted words. Often not a word apart. In New Orleans, there's something un-American. Creole cuisine is very spicy. The shops sell all kinds of strange sauces - they are called like "farting raccoon", "Burning Ass", "cockroaches", "Biker bitch." The city beautiful ride vintage trams 1, $ 5 fare. They are very old: to stop, you have to pull the rope.

Everywhere and everything - about jazz, they even named Louis Armstrong Airport. They also have a tradition in the trees and the houses hanging beads.




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