How to deal with poisonous people

Toxic people can turn even the most cloudless life into a series of emotional storms.
They inspire guilt, they hint at the failure of the interlocutor, they manipulate emotions.
And all this under the guise of friendship or intimacy.
As a journalist who has encountered this phenomenon in many different fields.
From office groups to social gatherings, I can say with confidence:
The ability to deal with toxic people is vital.
Otherwise, they will suppress your inner light, destroying your self-esteem from within.




Why toxic people have such a strong impact
Surprisingly, many people do not realize that they are communicating with a person.
They are gently but persistently poisoning their lives.
Some hide behind too close family ties, others - corporate subordination.
When a boss or colleague is not easy to avoid.
Guilt and the habit of justifying others’ destructive behavior also play a role.
However, psychologically, the poison spreads quite quickly.
causing chronic stress, irritability and decreased self-esteem.


Identifications of “Poisonous” People

• Constant criticism. A toxic person is not so much an indication of real flaws.
  How much he tries to shake your confidence, ridicule ideas and decisions.
• Manipulation of feelings. Able to professionally cause guilt, shame or anxiety
  I want you to do what they want you to do, not you.
• egocentrism. Any topic is reduced to their person, the interests of others are not essential.
• Double standards. What they allow themselves to do, they sincerely condemn in you.
• Constant “heating” of conflicts. It is important for them to maintain the atmosphere of drama in order to always stay in the center of events.

7 Strategies for Behavior with Toxic People

1. Clear boundaries.
   Do not allow the interlocutor to be personal, insult or humiliate you.
   Be clear that you are uncomfortable with such treatment, and if the situation does not change,
   You can break off communication.
   Boundaries should be not only in the head, but also in actions.
   
2. Practice indifference to provocations.
   Toxic people often put pressure on sore spots.
   They can make fun of your mistakes, downplay your achievements, and compare you to others.
   The task is to learn not to react sharply, but to keep a neutral tone.
   Remember, they are literally feeding on your emotional explosion.
   
3. Don't be afraid to ignore it.
   Sometimes the best answer is complete silence.
   If the other person tries to rock you using aggression or sarcasticness,
   Just don't keep talking.
   After a while, the person will realize that you are not a convenient target for their toxicity.
   
4. Keep your critical thinking.
   Toxic people often twist the facts.
   They question obvious things or try to suggest that “everyone around them thinks the same way.”
   Turn on “Verification Mode”: Are the words really true?
   Ask yourself, “Do I have proof that he/she is right?”
   
5. Don't let guilt take over.
   One of toxic people’s favorite tools is guilt.
   “You don’t love me if you don’t help,” “If you were normal, you would do that.” . . .
   Understand that this is just a trick to subdue you.
   In healthy relationships, people negotiate, not blackmail with guilt.
   
6. Look for allies.
   In the working environment or even in the circle of relatives, not everyone can immediately understand who is provoking conflicts.
   Tell those you trust about what’s going on.
   They may have similar observations, and together you will find a way to minimize the effects of a toxic person.
   
7. Think ahead.
   A toxic relationship (whether it’s a friendship, work relationship, or even a romantic one)
   It lasts for years and nothing changes, so ask yourself:
   Why do you continue to communicate that destroys your self-esteem and inner peace?
   Sometimes the best way out is to decide to distance or break up to make room for a healthier relationship.
   

Don't forget yourself.
Toxic people, like emotional vampires, are quietly draining your resources.
Therefore, it is important to learn to protect yourself from their negative influence.
In addition to these strategies, do not forget to take care of yourself.
It can be sports, creativity, socializing with positive people or even consulting a psychologist.
Anything that helps restore balance strengthens your emotional resilience and lowers your emotional balance.
The possibility of being exposed to someone else’s poison in the future.


As much as one would like to believe that “all men are good,” one sometimes has to admit the reality:
Toxic personalities will always find their way to you unless you learn to set clear boundaries.
To maintain your inner balance is to learn to say no in time.
Do not be afraid to stop communicating and value your own feelings more than other people’s manipulations.
And then no “poisonous” attacks can darken your life.