My mother was very bored, so I decided to take her abroad, but now I regret it.

Even if mommy retiredShe tries to help her children as much as she can. Especially in a tough year. We are always children for our mothers. And that's not surprising. Much more embarrassing are stories in which mothers behave differently.



But do not forget that our parents have to get older. There is no old energy, the old fuse. Friends are getting smaller, if they stay at all. Increasingly, they need ordinary human attention. As children, we need to be closer. Even if it brings some difficulties at home.

Help me with advice, people are kind. How to live with your mother in a foreign country, and even if you have absolutely no time for anything but work? I'm slowly going crazy, but I don't know what to do. Even my husband noticed the oddities in my behavior, and he usually doesn't give a damn about these little things. This is terrible!



Peels, let me tell you a little bit about myself. Married at 27. At 30, my husband and I moved to the United States for permanent residence. Both settle down, find jobs, get used to unfamiliar surroundings, people. Basically, we're good at it. I become a manager at a chain restaurant. The husband, as in his homeland, goes to the auto mechanics. It takes 5 years.

By this time, my mother is 63 years old. I love and appreciate her very much. But after her father's recent departure, she's getting worse. Worse morally. Don’t get me wrong: Mom is a grown woman, but she had a special bond with her father. She didn't make any real friends, or I don't know anything about them. Being alone at your age becomes even more difficult. There's no one to go out with.



And so, I suggest she come and live with us. She agrees, it's not without a problem that we do all the paperwork, and finally, my mother ends up in my house. I take two days off and we spend time together. Sunshine, pool, lots of good food. Why not? Mom acclimatizes right away, and it's kind of supposed to be okay.

But then came what I was talking about from the beginning. I had to go back to work and leave my mom alone. She doesn't know English, she can't drive. Even to connect to the Internet, I have to be home. What is she supposed to do? I don't even have a swimming pool. So it's a prison in a sense.



Peels Mom didn't go for it either. She doesn't want to meet someone new. Even if the person came from former Soviet countries. After work, I didn’t want to go anywhere, and we live outside the city. Half an hour by car to spend forty minutes in some local restaurant, even if not bad? And then get back to sleep without your hind legs? I'm not that old myself.

The husband, instead of helping us, completely abstracted. He was nice to my mom, but nothing more. As I went to work in the morning, I came back late at night. He was lucky, he liked the work, he liked the team, he knew the language before moving. Even used to local football, which is more like rugby. In short, my husband is doing very well.



A retired colleague's mom advised me to send my mom to a nursing home. But first of all, it's not our method. And secondly, my mom isn't that old yet. She could take over for me at work if she knew the language and had more energy. But what do we do now? I can't give it to strangers. It's out of the question.

Mom needs to live here for at least a year. Don't ask why. You just have to, that's all. Somehow this time you have to try to live. They do not quarrel with each other and, if possible, do not go mad. If you have any thoughts, I would love to hear them. I don’t have any ideas and my husband doesn’t help.



Peels, things happen in life. It's true. But I am not going to hurt my mother. She did not give birth to me and raised me so that I would betray her after all this. That's not what people do. And my decision on this is a flint.