How to raise a daughter Bashny.Net

Society operates on gender stereotypes. It is believed that the girl should be a nice creature, docile, kind, obedient, economic. That’s how it is, these qualities are inherent in women to a less or more degree. But not just these.

Raising a girl, you do not need to immerse her in the framework of the same type of behavior and patterns. In today’s world, household responsibilities are increasingly shared equally between men and women, and in some European countries, both men and women are required to take maternity leave. Who knows what will happen next?

We will tell you about the main mistakes that, according to psychologists, make modern mothers, raising a girl. Try not to repeat them.





DepositPhotos Raising a Girl

1. Become her girlfriend.
   When a girl trusts her mother, shares her thoughts and feelings with her, it is good. But when a mother talks to her daughter on an equal footing, it's bad. If she talks about her problems, asks the unformed person for advice, shares not always favorable details of the relationship with her husband, that is, the father of the girl, the daughter begins to feel to some extent responsible for the emotional state of the mother. She learns to keep quiet about her own problems, because the one around her is so bad.
   
   This girl is trying to become a psychological support for the mother. The result is not friendly, but consumer relationships. Friendship with a child can be made if you build it on his interests and experiences.
   
   
   
   
   
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2. Tell her, "You're a girl!"
   It is the imposition of standards of conduct. To become free from restrictions, the girl chooses the reverse line of behavior, conditionally boyish, because, as it seems to her, the boys do not follow any conventions. The girl should be treated first and foremost as a person. Also use me-messages. Instead of "You're so sloppy." A girl shouldn't be like this" say, "I get upset when I have to clean and wash a lot.
   
   
   
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3. Raising a daughter, trying to realize her dream of a son
   Sometimes they wanted a boy and a girl was born. She is recorded for struggle, taken on fishing, hunting, blamed for emotionality, brought up in strictness. Such a girl will not be happy and will have problems with self-identification. At the same time, if she chooses one of those things, the more often the boys get involved, nothing bad will end.
   
   
   
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4. Forcing the eldest daughter to sit with the youngest child
   Taking care of the child is the responsibility of the parents. They are responsible for his life and health, minor children do not bear such responsibility for their younger brothers and sisters. If the elders agree to help or show a desire to spend time with the younger, then so be it. But you cannot force them in any case, every child has the right to childhood, even if he was born earlier.
   
   Imposing obligations can lead to a deterioration of relations between children and the reluctance of the eldest daughter in adulthood to have children.
   
   
   
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5. Punishment for fights and boy games
   Sometimes parents are afraid that the daughter will grow up unfeminine, aggressive, rude and therefore suppress her interest in active games or shooters. It's unnecessary. For a girl to grow up feminine, dad needs to stop seeing her as a kid, and mom needs to set a good example. And then there will be no fights, the daughter will unconsciously follow her mother’s example and meet her father’s expectations.
   
   
   
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6. Demand too much
   The daughter, who is constantly demanded, will strive to earn love by deeds. And that's wrong. The child must understand that he is loved for nothing. The girl should be praised, to show her warmth and affection, no matter what. Then she will want to be kind and righteous.
   
   
   
   
   
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7. Teach your daughter to count only on herself
   Being able to take responsibility is important. But it is also important to be able to trust people, work in a team, conduct a dialogue, seek advice. A girl who counts only on herself will find it very difficult to rely on her husband in adulthood.
   
   
   
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8. Requiring her to be quiet and obedient
   Parents are very comfortable when the child does what he is told, does not show claims and even wishes. But it's uncomfortable for the baby. A girl who obeys absolutely everything will not learn to build her own boundaries. As an adult, she will continue to suffer psychological discomfort or even physical abuse because she is so used to it.
   
   
   
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9. The father does not pay enough attention to his daughter.
   When dad rarely praises and hugs his daughter, she feels deprived. And she grows up with a sense of needlessness, since even her father didn't pay attention to her. She tries to get the attention of cold and detached representatives of the opposite sex, to hear from them recognition of her merits.
   
   Therefore, each father should spend at least 15 minutes a day with his daughter in the format of high-quality warm communication.
   
   
   
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Education of boys and girls It's different. Girls are very sensitive, even those who try not to demonstrate the subtle structure of their nature. Features of girls' education consist in increased attention to their emotions and the need to show affection, including tactile contact in the form of hugs.

Read more about the education of girls and the imposition of gender stereotypes in our next articles. Follow the links.